MrFerret
Today, it's my birthday, and my present is that my mom is coming over to see me so that she can borrow three hundred dollars. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Anonymous
United Kingdom
Today, it's my birthday. My parents, with whom I live, told me that they didn't get me anything, but instead they said they would knock off a bit of the housekeeping I owe them. FML
bannana0zoom
Canada
Today, it's my birthday. My mom got me a gym membership and a bunch of clothes that are a few sizes too small. FML
Anonymous
Floral Park, United States
Priorities
Today, my mother flipped out that I spent $20 on a gift for myself for my birthday. Instead of getting a gift for me, she spent $300 on a new vacuum cleaner, and claims that we didn't have enough left in our budget to spend on me. FML
Trew Love
Fort Saint John, Canada
Mix up
Today, it's my birthday. I called my mom to thank her for the gift she'd sent. She was surprised and said, "Oh I thought you were waiting to open it." She ended the conversation with, "OK, I'll call you on your birthday." FML
story of my life
Partyblocked
Today, it's my birthday. I'd asked my mom weeks ago if she could watch my kids, so my husband and I could go celebrate. She told me an hour before we were supposed to leave I'd have to reschedule, so she could watch my brother's kids while he goes out for fun. Gee, thanks mom. FML
crookedteeth
United States
Today, for my birthday, my mom presented me with a $4,000 check to pay for my braces. I've been very self-conscious about my teeth for years. Everyone applauded and told me how happy they were for me. Later, my mom asked me for the check back. Apparently it was just meant to make her look good. FML
Username
Life is a roller coaster
Today, it's my birthday and my mom took me and some friends to an amusement park. Looking for a tampon, I found a phone in my mom's purse that I didn't recognize. Turns out my mom is cheating on my dad. Happy birthday to me, I guess. FML
mybmw
United States
Today, was my mom's birthday. I recently got my first job, thanks to her, and could finally afford to buy her something nice. I spent my first paycheck ever on buying her a very nice bracelet. She said it was nice, then asked if I would mind if she exchanged it for one she actually liked. FML
Anonymous
United States
Today, I missed a call from my mom. It's my birthday, and glad she remembered, I called back to thank her. She was surprised when I brought up going out for dinner, and asked me what the occasion was. FML
Poor Student
Canada
Today, my mother "borrowed" money from my stash to help pay for her vacation to the Dominican Republic. The same trip I'm not allowed to go on. FML
Top comments
CareFace 16
Best present EVARRR. That's the price you gotta pay for putting her naughty spot in a world of pain. :)
MarkFeehily 0
happy birthday! :D
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Comments (115)
CareFace 16
Best present EVARRR. That's the price you gotta pay for putting her naughty spot in a world of pain. :)
alicianoar 7
Hahahahahahaaa.
Heather_x0x0 6
LMAO!!!!!!! I can't decide if that's a win or not....but it was funny...
i_love_grrr 0
well his mom was any like mine she would not have felt it lol
CareFace 16
You're calling your mother a big hole? I wouldn't hand THAT on a card for mothers day..
Kawboy 1
lol #28
xXBlAcKxWiDoWXx 0
its my birthday too!!! happy birthday!
AMagicalLeoplura 0
happy birthday OP & 95, it's also my birthday :)
MrNiceGuy569 18
But it's her fault...
TylerX 0
Don't whine, at least she came to see you.
Felipeg33 0
I love my mommy :) and would definitely help her out whenever she would need
spazzy910 0
#2 I hope your joking every mother should see their child AT LEAST weekly
10thPrestige 0
Why are you so ungrateful.
MarkFeehily 0
happy birthday! :D
TheRealFamilyGuy 5
my mum tried to take money from me once, I told her she would have to work for it. long story short that's how I got my extension built
mostyn 0
No-one finds your comments funny. Please rethink your strategy to get likes.
TheRealFamilyGuy 5
congrats you just made it to the top of my "must kill list". I hope you're happy.
SchiTzenGiglez 0
you know, legally he's allowed to call the police
SchiTzenGiglez 0
that's a legitimate death threat
TinyDude 10
6 are u that stupid to make death threats on the internet? u mu have a deprived childhood.
TheRealFamilyGuy 5
oh no somebody call the wambulances!!!
iLazy 0
Please just stop you are tuning family guy for everyone because even the viewers have the logic to know he only uses Internet for ****. Please gtfo FML and do that since you seem to idolize him so much.
iLazy 0
Ruining*
Mustardnight 3
dude shut up... no one likes a firestarter as for OP, sucks to be you (srs) but birthdays are relatively unimportant anyways. i didnt celebrate my 18th
TheRealFamilyGuy 5
all I have to say to that ilazy, is firefox is shit and Internet explorer is way better lol
iLazy 0
All I have to say is the similarity between you and Peter griffin is the lack of IQ.
TheRealFamilyGuy 5
you missed our rugged good looks and our awesomeness? i count 3 similarities :)
iLazy 0
Our? Nah you're just a wannabe. So I guess you're a 200kg man with a ********-shaped chin and is stupid enough to drink diesel as a replacement for red bull thinking it is fuel for your body?
TheRealFamilyGuy 5
stupid? you mean ingenious! i can get 1 litre of diesel for $1 but only 350ml of redbull for $3. yes my liver will take a hit but hey that's why I pay for health insurance.
Kyakan 1
I love how with that statement you actively called yourself idiotic
littlemissFYL 5
Stop hate. Piss glitter.
TinyDude 10
no wonder all ur insurance agents bailed on u. sad man.
e077 15
Now I know your full of it firefox is shit and Internet explorer is way better in what universe lol .
Rainbow_dumpster 28
STFU about Firefox. Firefox is hot and IE's not, Troll. IE doesn't do shit but get viruses and loads too slowly. Get a life, you loser.
shenaniganry 3
81: taking Internet commentary too seriously.
SchiTzenGiglez 0
I loath you with every fiber of my being
supersixfour 7
just shut up.
Livinia 11
Aww :( Other than that, I hope you have a wonderful birthday :)
ElGranOrgo 0
you are such a sweetheart
itsmahum 1
wow your mom sucks - I hate it when parents do that
dreamering 16
Your mom spent way more than $300 for your caprices when you were a child. Payback time.
KaanTech 0
agreed
emariebake 0
that is stupid. nobody asks to be born. if they didn't want to pay for that stuff, they should've worn a dicksock. I'm a mom, and I will never ask my child for money.
dreamering 16
Yes, you're right. Make sure you buy him PS3 with a 46" flat HDTV when he asks for on his 6th birthday, a Wii for his 7th, an expensive car for his 16th, college money and so on. Later on you never know what life can bring. Few years ago many people lost their retirement money, or God forbid any medical condition it may occur, etc. Kids will be the first where you will go for help. Trust me for that. It happened to me with my parents and I was proud to help them.
Thanatos1206 0
She could be dead tomorrow for all you know so be grateful she's visiting.
shenaniganry 3
...wow.
jess6blondie9 3
It's true.
deafeningsilence 8
Well if the only reason she's visiting is to mooch off her own son, then OP is not being ungrateful, he's being logical.
BamBarBiYaKergud 2
mon is mom. u did right thing if u gave her money. she gave u much more than 300.
ugliness 6
you don't owe your parents anything, they are supposed to raise you without being a drain on your hard earned resources in life