Today, I woke up to "we're leaving". I'm now homeless because my Dad and his girlfriend got into an argument over toilet paper. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, the lease on my house ended and I finished moving in with my girlfriend. After everything was moved in, she broke up with me. Hello homelessness. FML
Today, I'm living in a hotel and my mum took a fat dump, clogging the toilet. When she tried to plunge it, it began overflowing. I had to start running in and out with trash and clean the room as fast as possible so that they didn't have any extra reasons to kick us out. Turns out they can't do anything tonight. FML
Today, after my housemate handed in his notice to vacate without telling me beforehand, I had few days whilst working to make a decision to stay or vacate. In a panic, I chose vacate. On my day off I sat down with my finances and discovered I can't afford elsewhere. I asked to stay, my landlord put up rent by 50%. I might now become homeless. FML
Today, I'm being evicted from my apartment for not paying rent. My father is the on-site landlord, meaning I now have to move my stuff downstairs into his place, and hear every day how I'm a failure. FML
Today, I went to the bathroom at my boyfriend's house. Right as I sat down and started taking a dump, I looked over at the empty toilet paper roll and remembered his roommate had told us the night before that they were out of toilet paper. FML
Today, after I got into an argument with mom's boyfriend, telling him to piss off because no one wanted him, and he did so, saying he was done putting in wasted effort, now he's gone I realise how much he did for us, or that his share of the bills paid the rent. We may lose our house because of me. FML
Today, I got a notice in the mail saying I had been fired from my job. My dad's the boss, who I happen to live with. FML
Today, I brought my girlfriend home for the first time to meet my parents. They were having a heated argument because my mom had bought "the wrong toilet paper" and my dad was angry because "she should know that he has a sensitive anus." FML
Today, I woke up to find my house TP'd. I also noticed our entire house was devoid of toilet paper. Someone had broken in just to steal our toilet paper and TP our own house with it. FML
Today, I ran out of toilet paper. I yelled from the bathroom for my parents to bring me some toilet paper. My dad slipped one tiny piece of toilet paper under the door and boomed, "THE FINAL TEST." FML
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Top comments
steveykinz0967 16
Wow their relationship is really in the toilet.
Allornone 35
you roll the paper over, not under, dammit.
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Comments (67)
thebrainiac 9
That relationship prob wouldn't have worked anyway if it was so fragiel
Mobetta_2300 22
Thats pretty crappy
vikky538 29
I toilet paper can make you homeless
worldclassrager 41
How does this make you homeless? I am a little confused follow up please
sorasaveshyrule 16
OPs dad left his girlfriend and her house, where they were living, making OP homeless.
Colon_Man 17
AAHHH! Thanks for clearing that up for me, too.
Justabastard 10
That's a shitty way to become homeless
Cinderella88 8
Buy them their own special toilet paper
Exaspera 55
Probably the "last sheet" of the relationship
Eilsel_fml 2
I think maybe OP and his/her father lived at the Girlfriend's house.That seems like the most plausible reason to me.So she kicked the father (and obviously OP) out over toilet paper.
bluefairy_fml 24
Marriage prep classes? That actually exists? wow :))
sailorarctic 22
I honestly think there's more to it than that though P if toilet paper was enough to set them off there's obviously problems brewing long before that