Today, I woke up to my boyfriend jumping on my bed exclaiming that he had "won the lottery." He broke the bed. Turns out he only won £15.80. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend came home, complaining about not having enough money for bills. He then pulled a stack of lottery tickets out of his bag, saying, "I hope one of these wins." FML
Today, I won the lottery. My ex-girlfriend has the ticket. I just broke up with her. FML
Today, I scratched a lottery ticket I had gotten for my birthday and won $10,000. In celebration, I jumped up and raised my hands directly into a ceiling fan. Oh, and it was a fake ticket. FML
Today, I woke up to a warm bed, the morning sunlight bathing my face, and my boyfriend sneaking my credit card out of my purse. FML
Today, my Dad called me to tell me that he had finally won the lottery and that I no longer had to worry about trying to find a way to pay for school. I was so excited I started crying. He then told me that he won $5 on a scratch off lotto ticket. He bought a sandwich. Funny dad. FML
Today, not only did my ex-wife take everything in our divorce, my most recent lottery ticket was off by only one number, I would have won millions and she wouldn’t have been entitled to a penny. Oh well, back to sleeping in my caravan, which is all I have left. FML
Today, I won 20 dollars on a lotto scratch off. My friend, pissed, makes me split the money, saying it was collateral for the gas money used to get us there. He then used his 10 dollars on a scratch off, and won 500 dollars. The jackass wouldn't split it. FML
Today, I went to get a scratch off lottery ticket, and the dude in front of me got the same one I was going to get. He won 500 dollars. I got 2 bucks. FML
Today, I woke up and found a trail of £5 notes in my bedroom, which led all the way downstairs and into the bathroom. I got to the last one, where I was then kicked in the balls from behind. It was my sister. She said it was the money she'd borrowed from me. I was left in my underwear writhing in pain. FML
Today, I bought a lottery ticket. Two hours ago, I found out that the ticket was worth $100. Five minutes ago, I found my dog eating it. FML
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Top comments
ArtIsResistance7 1
Well, if I've learned anything from MacGyver, £15, a blanket, and some duct tape, will make a pretty sweet hammock...
chocolatedrop 0
how much is that n dollars?
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Comments (101)
nikemike 0
haha
dabowlingman 14
you deserved it for using £ instead of $.. USA ftw
allen20 0
anyone know what ftw means?
ZombieDios 1
ftw = **** the world >.> yeeeeessss...he/she will believe that
ibanez370 0
its for the win .. lol :)
duranharold 0
how much is that in dollars
fadingaway 17
How much is that in rands?
zolltf 4
how much is that in gold mario coins?
nixonskatel 0
46 FTW haha
crackerkilla 0
stupid nigga
jmoose311 3
You shouldn't be sleeping with boys before you're married. YDI.
nerdsgetmehot 23
#53 That is so entirely irrelevant. OP said nothing about having sex with him-- and besides, not everyone shares your views.
TheIrishJaneDoe 9
Ugh, AGAIN with this?! Protip: If you're going to play the self-righteous troll role, the better approach here would be "YDI for gambling."
thefull9yards 4
same thing happened to me for $4
ashleytiffany 0
possibly f the world?