Today, I went to a club to celebrate New Year's Eve. A cute guy came up to me at the bar and asked my name. I thought my 8 year long dry spell was finally about to end. I smiled and said "Chrissy!" He said "That's a whore's name!" and wandered back off into the crowd. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I saw a cute girl at a night club. When I approached her and introduced myself, she said "Don't you remember me? We danced here last weekend... but you were smashed that night". I cheekily replied "Oh really? That's hot, what happened next?" She said "You were hitting on me. So, I left." FML
Today, I was at a club with a friend. A cute guy kept smiling and looking over at me. He left his seat and went to the bar and brought back two drinks. He waved me over and then said, "Can you tell your hot friend that I bought her a drink?" FML
Today, I dressed up in my nicest clothes and spent ages putting makeup on before going to a nightclub, hoping to meet someone nice. The only person who acknowledged me was a guy who yelled, "Hey, wanna fuck?! Not like anyone else would ever touch you, am I right?!" FML
Today, desperate to meet a guy, I went clubbing. The only guy to show any interest opened with, "You're hot, for a black chick!" FML
Today, I finally turned 21, so my friends and I decided to go to a club. There, I met this hot waitress and we were really hitting it off. I ordered a drink. She replied, "No problem, kiddo." FML
Today, I saw a cute girl at a bar and decided to go and chat her up. After charming her with my usual crap for a while, I told her she was really pretty, and asked for her number. She replied, "You asshole, I met you here a year ago and gave you my number, and you never called me." FML
Today, I was at a club and caught a cute guy's eye from across the bar. He smiled at me, got up and came over, then said "Oh shit! You looked way hotter from back there. Damn!" and walked away. FML
Today, I went to a club with a couple of my friends. I met a really cute guy and we were getting along pretty well. We eventually exchanged numbers. Later on I decided to call him and set up a date. The number he gave me was the Rejection Hotline number. FML
Today, I saw an adorable girl at the bar and I went to talk to her. I decided to use my cheesiest pick up line to make her laugh. After I said it, she knew who I was. It was my cousin I hadn't seen in 8 years. FML
Today, I was out clubbing, when I saw a pair of very cute girls sitting at the bar, so I went over, hoping to introduce myself. I swung my leg over the stool, and through no fault of my own, sat on my own balls. I quickly got thrown out for "harassing the ladies." FML
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Top comments
MrSassypants 34
If he's going to be all pissy, and throw a hissy, for your name being Chrissy, you shouldn't mess with that mister, missy.
tranced_ 45
Well that's whorrable!
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Comments (114)
Dreamsorrow93 24
When I go to a bar just to get laid I use my ***** name Star. It works well.
xninix_fml 36
How the **** is that a ****** name?
ZenoTheBeano 13
.
teentee401 37
I'm wondering how him asking your name meant that your dry spell was about to end...
xninix_fml 36
Because he was hopefully going to hit on her? Although I think she's better off without him.
brasiliano 16
Lucky you for not ending your dry spell with a guy that knows well which one is and isn't a ****** name. He probs paid a few to know.
hi_low18 6
Was his name Bitch?
GunSlinger69 19
Wow, what a dick but that is pretty funny.
cheesyfeet2001 31
Happy new year!
artiststatement 21
Happy new year to you! So who else is getting this badge tonight?
Arathis 19
Me
brianlarkin 7
What the ****?
laden_swallow09 35
… Huh??