Today, I went down on the girl of my dreams. While I was down there, I started to put on a condom. As I came back up to start having sex, she told me she couldn't cheat on her boyfriend. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, while finally about to make love with my long-term boyfriend, he came from putting a condom on. FML
Today, I was about to lose my virginity to my girlfriend, with whom I am genuinely in love. Right after I'd got the condom on, she said, "You do know this is break-up sex, right?" FML
Today, I lost my virginity to the girl of my dreams. I could tell she really enjoyed it, because she muttered, "Well, that was disappointing." afterwards, then got dressed, said she'd made a huge mistake, and asked me not to call her again. Yep, total stud. FML
Today, I went down on my boyfriend while he was drunk, and he told me to get protection from his bedroom. I came back, he was passed out on the couch. His parents then came into the room after hearing noises. I was sitting there naked holding a condom while he was fast asleep. FML
Today, I was having sex with a girl. After we finish, she tells me she already has a boyfriend, and that his penis is larger than mine. FML
Today, I finally hooked up with the girl of my dreams. We went back to her place, and I explored every inch of her body; luscious lips, hourglass curves, genital warts... The worst part was when she got angry when I refused to continue, shouting, "No wonder you're still a virgin!" FML
Today, I was going down on a girl. When I looked up she was texting. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were getting intimate, and I gave her a condom to put on me. She tried to open it with her teeth, but ripped it. That was my only condom. I'm now sitting here watching a soap opera with a boner. FML
Today, I finally got intimate with my girlfriend, the girl of my dreams. I undressed and, ready to step in bed with her, I see her staring at 'it'. Which was quickly followed by laughter. FML
Today, I was having sex with a girl I really like for the first time. After a while I told her I was about to come. Her response, "Lucky you." FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Steffi3 40
Because obviously going down on someone doesn't count as cheating. Wait...
selfsabotage 4
Wonder how her boyfriend would feel about his girlfriends "loyalty". Sucks to be you dude but if this is the girl of your dreams I would think you know enough about her to know she had a boyfriend.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (198)
AFCCT 7
Plot twist: She's blonde and you are her boyfriend!
Muny_fml 17
Dude I feel real sorry 4 ya
The_Big_Boss 20
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
TIL oral sex isn't cheating. Thanks OP
laden_swallow09 35
I'd facepalm, too. 15's face. With a backhand.
Ladisa 28
Why? 15 was obviously being sarcastic. Or am I seeing more than there actually is?
ChibiChibi_fml 28
Were you aware of this girl's relationship status before you went down on her? If you were than quite frankly you are an ass for getting with a taken girl and I feel you deserve the blue balls. She's of course a huge c*nt for screwing around behind her boyfriend's back and I hope her boyfriend finds out soon. If you weren't aware of her relationship status then f your life and I'm sorry that you had to suffer because of a c*nt like that. I hope you find a not taken girl who tickles your fancy as well as your pickle.
marrkkoopolo 1
I actually read all that :)
BellaBelle_fml 23
What an accomplishment. You should be proud of yourself.
bonnie04 5
thats not nice to call him an ass, he didnt know
ChibiChibi_fml 28
Hence the word IF. IF he knew than he has been called an ass. IF he didn't than he hasn't been called an ass.
Quiet_one 22
But... she already did... This kind of "logic" hurts my brain.
perdix 31
Translation: Your pussy-eating skills are awesome! Don't even think of coming up and wanting more. Lick away, monkey boy! I'm glad I could help.
zaise_chsa 19
You should have given her a good tongue lashing. Maybe if you tell her boyfriend he'll lick her into shape.
jude_iscariot 7
It's all good. Just ask her to suck your ****, then. Clearly oral doesn't count.
perdix 31
I wouldn't be surprised if the boyfriend was ok with her outsourcing the work in that department to you. He'll probably happily buy you a beer and some dental floss. ;)
yscpunkchick 14
Well, maybe she's an MC Chris fan? "eatin' ain't cheatin'".... (I in no way agree with that logic, BTW)