Today, I was watching TV on the couch. My mom then kicked me off so she could lie down. Exhausted, I asked if I could sit at the end. She said no. A minute later she called the dog to come sit with her. As I was sitting on the ground, my mom told me to move because, "the dog can't see the TV." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was sitting in my room watching TV when I heard my mother obnoxiously yelling for the dog. Minutes later she stomped into my room, swatted me over the head, and yelled at me for not answering when she called. She actually got my name mixed up with the dog's. FML
Today, after watching TV, my boyfriend and I had to go walk our dog. I was too lazy to get up from the couch immediately so I teased him by turning off all the (smart) lights using my phone. He got mad and went upstairs to continue watching TV, so now I have to walk the dog alone. FML
Today, my boyfriend kicked me out of bed so the dog could get under the covers. FML
Today, I fell down the stairs. My mom came running from the other room because she thought it was the dog. She rolled her eyes and walked away when she saw it was me. FML
Today, my mom's dog saw a cat in our yard. I watched as he tried to jump at it, only to smack face-first into the window. He did this twice more before curling up on the floor and whimpering pitifully. When my mom came in and saw him there, and me laughing, she accused me of beating him. FML
Today, my dog and I were sitting on the couch. I went to the bathroom, came back, and saw him walk over the remote, which caused the TV to change to the Hustler channel, just a few moments before my girlfriend walked through the door. FML
Today, my mother yelled and yelled at me until I apologized to our cat for not petting him when he sat on my lap. FML
Today, I was laying on a couch with my dog watching TV when I heard my dog fart. I looked at her, she looked at me and started waving her tail, blowing it into my direction. FML
Today, my mom was in a really bad mood, so I stayed in my room to avoid her. It didn't take long before she barged in and started bitching about my dog, who'd pissed her off by acting too happy. Yes, she's actually that insane, and I have to deal with it on a daily basis. FML
Today, my mom and I were going to the store. I stayed in the car while she went in. In the car next to me, there was a dog in the driver's seat barking at me. Bored, I barked back at it until I realized there was someone in the passenger's seat watching me. FML
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Top comments
BKF 0
LMAO! But seriously, FYL your Mom's a bitch.
NGM_KID 0
Well, what makes you think you're more important than her dog? lol jk!! Your mom is such a bitch!!
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Comments (199)
deathbot 0
God forbid the dog doesn't get to watch tv.
carl4rules 0
plut
Zxmbye 0
I snicker to myself everytime I read a comment that says the mom's a bitch. XD Maybe you should "accidently" run over the dog. >=D
xO_starstruck_xO 0
your mom doesn't love you.
ShenziSixaxis 0
You live with that lump of meat? Ouch.. I feel sorry for you.
MyAchilles 0
Yea your mom is a douche.
tk89 0
#37, not everyone has a dad that's alive, or that they live with.
thequeenofscots 0
@42: I don't know, I think it depends. Shit like Two and a Half Men and How I Met Your Mother? Not really. Thinks like Band of Brothers and other series that are actually well-written and valuable, yes.
teehee520 0
Hope thats not an everyday thing and she's just PMSing.
Weil 0
If you did move, you are a pussy.