Today, I was walking through the mall with my husband. We came across a guy who was selling some weight loss pills. He tried to sell me some and I kindly declined. He told me not to deny my weight problems. Thanks. I'm 7 months pregnant. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my husband wants me to apologize for getting angry when his father told me I'm getting so fat that I look like a whale. I'm not fat, I'm just 8 months pregnant. FML
Today, I was grocery shopping. When I turned around I noticed a group of teens passing by laughing. I didn't think anything of it until I got to my cart. The losers had left a pack of Slim Fast in my cart. I'm pregnant. FML
Today, I ran into an old friend at the store with my infant daughter. As we caught up, she assured me that I could get rid of all my baby weight from the pregnancy. If only I had actually been pregnant. My wife carried her and looks fantastic. FML
Today, a customer greeted me with, "So! When's the baby coming!?" I'm NOT pregnant. I just gain weight in my guts. FML
Today, the creepy skin care guy at the mall with the heavy accent asked me if I was pregnant. When I said no he replied "Oh, too many donuts then?" FML
Today, I was taking my 3 month-old nephew for a walk in his stroller, when a lady stopped me to coo over him. Then she patted my stomach and said, "Don't worry, you'll lose the baby weight soon." I've never had a baby. FML
Today, while at a family baby shower, my grandfather thought it would be funny to inform me, in front of everyone, that I had gotten fat. I'm 7 months pregnant and the baby shower was for me. FML
Today, I was carrying some bags out of a store, and my shirt had scooted up a little. I had no free hands, so I ignored it. A woman stopped me to tell me that bare midriffs are only attractive on skinny girls, "not fat ones." I'm 6 months pregnant. FML
Today, while shopping for clothes, I asked the assistant to recommend something for me. She took me to the maternity section. Thanks, but I'm not pregnant. FML
Today, in the middle of the store, my daughter pointed at my belly and loudly announced that she was going to have a brother. I'm a man, and apparently I need to lose weight. FML
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Top comments
MrsUchiha 0
The best thing you can do is move on.. I mean there's no way this ****** up your life. You and your hubby know you're not fat so that's all that matters. Congrats on the baby. :)
astro_plastic 0
Train your baby to be a ninja assassin and come see that guy again in a few more months.
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Comments (147)
justkeepinitreal 0
You should be able to determine a pregnancy bump from a fat bump. If someone is genuinely confused between the two, their either completely retarded, or you were fat to begin with, and are just using the "I'm eating for two" thing a little too literally.
cynima 0
You know what? It would have been better if you ended with "I'm not pregnant." Or just, nothing at all.
kokonator 0
there's nothing bad about this just say that ur pregnant lol ... -_-
qzamml 0
i really don't think thats such a bad thing you know? it could have been much worse. like if you were REALLY fat and someone thought you were pregnant?
jeniilouise 0
why is this a fml? he thought you were fat but your actually not. so?
brichewyy 0
whoever said you deserved it is stupid
spktr 1
hit him in the face. how do you like them apples?
mkd0713 0
to hell with that guy. he's lucky it wasn't me bc I was hostile while I was pregnant. he would have gotten punched.
goonie85 0
Hmmmm, unless you have been pregnant (or at least an OB/GYN), let's not say when you should/ shouldn't start showing or how fat you're "allowed" to be. Everyone is different, and frankly, you don't know. So shutty your face.
rosaa_fml 0
at least u r not fat. u r just pregnant. what is THE fml?