Today, I was sitting on the bus next to a hot guy who was texting. I sneaked a peek at his phone to see if he was texting a girl so I could know if he was single. As I looked at his screen, he turned it towards me and typed in caps "STOP BEING A CREEPER." He got out of his seat and off the bus. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was on a bus with my friend's older brother. He was kinda cute. I went to message my best friend, telling her how cute this guy was, how he was kinda packing downstairs, and how adorable he was. Two minutes later, he wordlessly turned his phone screen to me. It was the message. I sent it to him by mistake. FML
Today, while riding the bus, a creepy guy gave me the "rape glare" and another guy repeated every word to the conversation I was having with my friend under his breath. FML
Today, I was on the bus when my crush told me to come and sit with him. I got all excited, especially when he put his arm around me. He then whispered in my ear "Hey, is your friend over there single?" FML
Today, a guy hit on me. It's such a rare occurrence that I didn't know how to react, so I panicked and said "Sorry, I have to go!" Then I remembered we were on a bus, and just turned around and awkwardly pretended he wasn't there. FML
Today, I was riding the bus home from school. I was sitting by myself, and my backpack was occupying the seat next to me. A hot girl boarded the bus, and was standing right where I was sitting. I placed my backpack on my lap, freeing up the seat. The girl stood the entire bus ride. FML
Today, I saw a cute guy on the bus. I smiled at him and he smiled back. After a couple of stops, he got off the bus. He bumped into me, turned around, apologized, and winked. I stood there feeling good about myself. Then I realized he stole my wallet. FML
Today, I decided to to gather up the courage to ask the cute boy in my math class for his number. He gave it to me, and I texted him later that night. But little did I know he actually gave me the number of the creep in class who is always grabbing my ass. I ended up asking the creep out. FML
Today, I was riding the bus home from college. I was standing in the aisle and there was a rather cute girl sitting next to me. The bus came to an abrupt stop, I tripped, and fell into her lap. She shrieked, "Eww! Get off me!" and shove me onto the floor of the bus. Nice to know I'm revolting. FML
Today, I got off a long shift and went to the bus stop. Upon arrival, I saw a girl giving a guy a blowjob. Disgusted, I tried to avoid them and sat on the bench to wait. The girl popped up angrily and looked over at me. "Can't you give us some privacy?!" This is the only bus stop nearby. FML
Today, I was trying to take a sneaky picture of a cute guy sitting across from me on a train. My phone’s flash went off. I panicked, dropped my phone, and then had to awkwardly stand up to retrieve it while he just smirked at me, clearly aware of what had just happened. FML
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Top comments
Chfanfiction 0
It's what you get for snooping. EDIT: What's more annoying: someone going "First!" or someone yelling out whatever number they got?
someone2love 0
You're pathetic. Next time a simple "HI" will do!
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Comments (156)
AlexZB 0
Today, I got embarressed. FML
GeekBunny 0
If anyone ever needs it, #35 gave an excellent summary of suggestions. I don't know about 2, because I'm shy and generally try to avoid eye contact at first. 1 is honestly the major factor you need in talking to... well, anyone, the advice can go for boys AND girls. I've given almost the same exact advice to a male friend of mine who has trouble approaching females. On the "only look for X seconds" note, I will say you should definitely employ that if you're scanning for visual clues for conversation openers. Only open with something you're actually interested in (i.e. if you're not into sports, and he's wearing sports gear, don't bother), the conversation will probably bore you and it will be obvious. And yes, it is entirely possible to be both shy and confident at the same time. You could start out with "Hey, sorry to bother you, but..." followed by one of the openings listed. As long as you're smiling and don't look too terribly nervous, most guys will respond positively. If they don't, they're not worth your time, move on. Even though I have a S.O. I am perfectly happy with, I still use these tactics to meet new and interesting people to be friends with (and flatter hot chicks, heh).
p00p0ster0us 0
Dear Horny Woman: It's not surprising that both men and women don't like it when other people breech their privacy. Especially when they do it out of romantic interest, because most people who would reach for such devices are sneaky and scheming rather than open communicators.
Baby_Sweets21 0
Ahahahahahaha LMAO thats actually really funny. I guess not to you but don't worry its all good.
kc2_fml 0
he was obviously gay... he says "creeper"
Nissi 17
YDI. MYOB. Kthxbai. .. But really. Whether he was talking to a girl or not, it's absolutely none of your business.
Jazzywrites007 2
I HATE IT When people say kthxbai. It has NOTHING to do with this bleeding FML but Ugh, that phrase is so bitchy and overused!
NCISagentMcGee 0
so a guy that you'll never ever see again thought you were a creeper. big. *******. deal
xXlolololXx 0
Sounds EXACTLYY like something I would do. U don't even want friends lurking by texts, never mind some creepy chick on a fuching bus. YDI sooo badly
ChrissyC 0
you couldnt have deserved this anymore. creepy, never gonna get laid.
Aish_fml 0
Funny guy! I'd date him...