Today, I was ringing an elderly gentleman up at work. As I went to package up the buns he ordered, he held up a hand and told me to wait. He then looked me in the eyes, started squeezing them, then winked and told me to go ahead. I've never felt so violated. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, at work at a grocery store an old couple came through my checkout lane. As I was putting their bagged groceries in the cart, the old man started feeling me up. FML
Tip off
Today, an old man wanted to give me a tip for bagging his groceries. He slipped some money as deep into my pocket as he could, stroking my thigh for a few long seconds in the process, then he gave me a creepy smile and winked before walking away. FML
Today, out of habit, I said "See you later" to a creepy old male customer who stared at my chest the whole time I was serving him. His response was to wink and say, "Oh, you will." FML
Today, at work, I put on a smile and went to take an elderly gentleman's order. He looked at me, asked if I'd stick a finger in his sweet tea to make it sweeter, then complained that it was a shame I wasn't "on the menu". FML
I just want to go home
Today, at work, I handed an old man his drink, and our fingers accidentally brushed. He gave me a creepy wink and a smile, but I ignored it. He's now been sitting in the store for two hours watching me. Only four hours to go until I get off. FML
Pervy perv walks
Today, I was at work as a grocery store cashier. I felt a hand slap my ass. Turning around I saw an old man winking at me and I screamed. When my manager came to deal with the problem she didn't believe me and gave the man a $25 gift card for "the trouble" I caused. FML
Thanks, I guess…
Today, I was working at the grocery store and a very old woman wanted to give me a tip for bagging her groceries. She slid a quarter into my pocket against my thigh as deep down as she could get it, then she gave me a smile and a wink. I was groped by a grandma. FML
Today, an elderly gentleman customer decided to tell me that while I'm not attractive at all, he'd still bang me all the same. Then he gave me a pained smile, like he was struggling not to shit himself, and left. I'm starting to hate working retail. FML
Today, I was cleaning at work when an elderly gentleman walked towards me, paused, and with a wink said, "That's what I like to see: a girl on her knees." This is the same workplace where another old man informed me that my yellow uniform made me look like a "suggestive cheesecake." FML
Dirty old bat
Today, as I was bent over at my waitressing job, an elderly woman walked by and smacked my ass. I looked at her, shocked, and she said, "It was too tempting with you bent over like that, I have a dirty old mind." I didn't know whether to be flattered or horrified. Maybe both. FML
Top comments
CommanderCman1 15
Be happy those are the only buns he squeezed.
awkwardloveannie 28
you violated? imagine how the buns must feel! and Theyre going home with him
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Comments (74)
emilycb93 12
Oh the elderly can get away with everything.
EdenCrystal 21
Just be glad he was squeezing those buns...
worldclassrager 41
I don't know what he does back at home with them..
Razi_tail 25
Grandparents need to spice up their love life too, maybe they just use buns for more fiber instead of whipped cream!
GEBEH 14
'Americanbun'
TaliaAmaraS 13
They must have been some hot buns...
breakinlegs 19
We talking hamburger or hot dog buns??
Razi_tail 25
Either way he wants to stick his meat in it!
applebramble 22
Gross... Totally got the disgusting image in my head now WTF! :s
AFCCT 7
You know what that means... He wants you to slide his hot dog into your buns. His brittle hands can't separate the bun while handling the moist wiener. God OP, get your head out of the gutter.
TXFernwoods 26
The elderly are creepy.
greekk 21
Maybe he wanted to feel if they were fresh before purchasing?
Nicole819 11
i'd say that senario isn't very likely since he winked but if he didn't do that, your comment would be valid lol
Sports_guy3 28
FYL, OP.
smokecloud_ 37
He just needed to check and make sure those buns were soft, yet firm. ;)