Today, I was playing with my vibrator. I was getting close when all of a sudden it short-circuited and made a sound like a laughing clown, scaring me half to death. FML
Geckosrock99 tells us more.
OP here. First of all, I'm nineteen. The ninety-nine in my username is just a random number. Not my birth year and not the number of geckos I have (or rather, used to have.) The vibrator wasn't running low on batteries. I had just changed them and, unfortunately for me, it was dying for good. I've had my fear of clowns since I was seven, because of that "IT" movie, so hearing that noise in the dark was pretty scary.
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Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
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Top comments
SkoomaKi 28
****** denied. Try again.
SeniorHaG 4
You've been trolled... By your own vibrator, lmao.
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Comments (181)
zandalee 20
1: Head straight for shower 2: Remove shower head from wall 3: Turn on water, warm and fast 4: Enjoy by applying water to your frilly-bits (Remember to threaten members of your household with death if they flush the loo whilst you are in pleasuring mode beforehand).
lil_ham1644 29
Frilly bits?
zingline89 18
**Prays to God that the 99 in your username does not mean you are 13**
Meme1988 18
That would be too early for a girl to have vibrator, i hope that too..
MochiDango 4
26 Girls in my town who are thirteen are already having sex, it is disgusting! So a thirteen year old having a vibrator (especially in my town) wouldn't surprise me... It's sad and sickens me, but it's true.
MissMae93 23
The average age for sex is now 11 - 14. Scary thought. That's like babies making babies. I honestly wouldn't be surprised if OP was 13.
bReLiNg 18
I know a few young prego kids.... *tsk tsk* I say we go back to chastity belts.
Hyde_is_Back 4
I'm all for that. Maybe that damn 16 & Pregnant show would be gone finally too.
Crazberry 5
I find it sort of ironic that there's such a big uproar about age now when a few centuries ago, a 21 year old such as myself would already be married with three kids (If I wasn't useless as a breeder and my husband wasn't dead). Don't get me wrong, the idea of an 11 year old doing anything other than holding hands is disgusting. There's no excuse for it now, since we have a higher life expectancy.
NicollieOlliO 0
Oh my god! Where is this statistic from?
MochiDango 4
44 That statistic is nasty, when I was that age I was spending time with my friends and being a kid. It's sad how they glamorize getting pregnant at a young age especially most statistics show that it results in troubled children (not saying all young parents are awful parents, because I personally know some that had kids at 16 and 17 that are excellent parents) but you can't tell me that those girls from Teen Mom are actually going to be successful, the only Teen Mom who was responsible is the one who put her baby up for adoption because she knew she wouldn't be able to give her baby the life that she deserved.
XxskyelovexX 13
I didn't know what sex or vibrators or any of that stuff was until I was 13. Okay well I knew that this so called "sex" thing made babies and a mommy and daddy would do it, but I didn't know it was for pleasure or anything like that so I ignored the thought of it
Tragichero92 12
Oh Mochi," did the dango ate your baby"?
MochiDango 4
Haha a Dango is another name for Mochi, but no, the Dango didn't eat my baby.
lovelyspyder 7
Key phrase- a few centuries ago....
MochiDango 4
I know, and they actually proved that a dingo did in fact devour that woman's baby.
DoomedGemini 38
Oh I didn't have sec that young, obviously that means all these young people having sex is a lie, right? Sorry, but it's true. 13 would be around marrying age in the past. I don't think they are old enough to make a good decision, but don't be ignorant. It's not "this age" it's not new, it's puberty. Puberty is getting the desires for sex, stop acting like it's ridiculous.
flopstar 21
My little sister was born in 99, she's 17 not 13(:
mcaisse77 17
This post is from 2012. It's four years old 17-4=13. So even your baby sister born in '99 was 13 then.
gichikku 14
#158, You also replied today. #13 replied in 2012.
Df1No 10
She commented that it was not her age. but then again it's 2016 now.. so..
flopstar 21
I did not see the Date!! Oops
ShyAnn29 15
That would scare me too! But the FML did make me laugh lol
jollyton 10
LMFAO!!!!! You made my day!!!! Thank you for your story... (^_^)
vero559 7
Dang that sucks.
Dodge4x4Ram 46
Not Another Teen Movie intro
zandalee 20
I know right! Today, I was like playing with my vibrator...
ShyAnn29 15
*movie preview guys voice* Coming up next: girls and their vibrators
vintage3113 6
HAHAHAHA I don't even care how much I get downvoted thats hilarious
MochiDango 4
I'm sorry that happened to you OP, I know that if it were me, I would have pissed myself and cried. Dying batteries and short circuiting makes everything sound demonic, I used to have a toy dog that if you pulled his tail he'd exclaim "It hurts! It hurts!" when his batteries started to die I put him in my closet and he'd be in there, at the bottom of my toy chest crying out "It hurts! It hurts!" at all hours of the night... Needless to say it was traumatizing.
PleadingInsanity 20
That's terrifying! I would have thrown it away or at least taken it out of my room.
perdix 31
Was that your "Fifty Shdes of Grey" BDSM sex toy?
MochiDango 4
45 He was thrown away, thank god, hearing "it hurts!" as a six year old kid coming from my closet used to terrify me. And 63 no, but thank you for ruining my childhood (I'm joking, I laughed hysterically)
Izabushel 65
I think that would terrify anyone at any age!
Enslaved 38
Too bad "IT" didn't get you off first. :P *** I never looked at clowns the same after that movie!!
Desfar 5
Between talks of OP possibly being 13 and OP getting pleasured by "IT", there's enough disturbing mental imagery here to last me a month...
MochiDango 4
Clowns are creepy enough as it is, full grown adults putting on tons of make up to attract the attention of and to play with small children? Seems pretty sketchy to me.
tarickman 13
That's why you don't buy your toys from the creepy clown at the circus.