Today, I was planning to start my fitness regime and lose weight, using the bike that had been lying unused in my garden for the past six months. Tonight, the bike was stolen from my garden. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I finally received the bicycle I ordered months ago. It was an expensive custom-made bike which perfectly fit my 6'9" frame. Today, that bike got stolen. FML
Today, I rode my bike to the store because I only had a few things to pick up. When I walked back out after five minutes, my bike was stolen. I had gone to the store to buy a new bike lock. FML
Today, the university bike permit that I'd ordered half a year ago finally arrived. Unfortunately, my bike was stolen months ago. FML
Today, I came home from work to find the lock to my bike busted and my bike stolen. The worst part was a nicer bike was sitting right next to it without a lock. FML
Today, I biked to the store to buy a new lock, since biking is my only form of transportation. I left my bike unattended for the last time, only to come back with a new chain, but no bike. FML
Today, I went to retrieve my stolen wallet from a train station. After I collected it, I returned to the place where I'd parked my bike, only to find that my bike had been stolen. FML
Today, not only did someone steal my bike, they also managed to get wasted and drunkenly ride my stolen bike through my new screened-in front porch, destroying it and the bike. FML
Today, I decided to bike to work. I normally forget the key to my lock, so I leave it out back and hope that nobody takes it, and nobody does. I finally remembered my lock key so I chained it up. After my 7 hour shift, I walk to the back only to find the lock had been cut, and my bike was gone. FML
Today, when I locked my newly repaired bike up, I carefully took the new rear light off it so that nobody could steal said light. Somebody stole my bike. At least I have a red light to play with. FML
Today, I discovered a purple BMX bike abandoned in my front yard. I wondered why it was there, until I looked over to discover that my own bike had been stolen. I guess they liked mine better. FML
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Top comments
aFreedom127 9
Chase the thief...it will be good exercise.
Buttsexpirate 9
******* garden gnomes. Always causing mischief.
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Comments (87)
SMHreally 0
Bad timing smh you can still exercise without a bike tho
stall2dude911 2
Exuses excuses
disney_blonde 16
Sounds like an excuse to me. You can exercise without a bike.
bubo_fml 11
Work in your garden & eat its produce...You'll lose a few that way...
OhHushDear 11
And now you're online, talking about it. Seems to me that you aren't very dedicated to losing weight O_o
Fmlsea 28
Ironic much
fourty_two 7
Seriously? Only one person noticed it says "fitness regime". Maybe a dictator stole your bike. I believe the word you're looking for is regimen. Don't use a word if you don't actually know it. Thanks.
Cartera 10
Why would you leave your bike in your garden unattended?
peete182 0
Stop making excuses you fat **** and go running
bizarre_ftw 22
The world is conspiring against your weight loss!! Still, better than your own subconscious doing so (plus, you didn't have to spend your day on the shitter)