Today, I was on a long-haul plane journey home from my holiday. After 5 hours, I decided to stretch my arms whilst watching a movie. Little did I know that a little girl was approaching, running down the aisle as my arm stretched out. I accidentally clothes-lined a little 9 year old girl. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I flew to see my long distance boyfriend who I haven't seen in 6 months. Upon seeing me, he ran up to me, picked me up and swung me around like they do in the movies. In doing so, my foot hit a 4 year-old child who was running past and knocked him out. FML
Today, I was boarding a plane and a woman's bag started to fall. In the spur of the moment I thrust my arm up to catch it. I didn't catch the bag, but I did catch her boob. I had to sit next to her for the rest of the flight. FML
Today, I boarded a plane. A woman decided that she didn't like where she'd put her carry on luggage and pulled it out from over my head. The heavy luggage then fell right onto my face, the wheel smacking me in the mouth and busting my lip open. She just laughed and waltzed away without a word. FML
Today, I was asleep on a plane. I woke up after feeling the plane jolt and I screamed at the top of my lungs. The little girl next to me told me I was a sissy. Everyone around us laughed. FML
Today, I was on a plane and a cute girl was getting ready to sit down beside me, but upon making eye contact, she asked to switch seats. FML
Today, while watching a movie with my girlfriend, I had to go to the bathroom. As I returned, I thought it would be cute to jump over the side of the couch and land next to her. I accidentally landed on her arm and broke her wrist. It wasn't as cute as I expected. FML
Today, I was getting onto an airplane and happened to admire the stewardess. I was walking onto the plane and was just about to talk to her when my foot slipped into the crack between the boarding ramp and the plane. Not only did she laugh as I limped to my seat but now I have bruised nuts. FML
Today, I went on a long flight. I was fortunate enough to sit next to a great girl. However, she must have thought I was not so great, because she moved to the empty seat across the aisle. Next to my dad. Who then told stories about how I always get motion sickness on airplanes. I then threw up. FML
Today, I was boarding a plane and an elderly woman asked if I could put her carry on into the overhead bin. Eager to help, I energetically lifted her bag up, and smacked her in the face with it. FML
Today, I was sitting in the airport, watching the baggage handlers load the plane I was about to get on. They were being really rough with it, one bag came open and all the clothes spilled out onto the tarmac. The clothes looked familiar. They were mine. FML
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Top comments
onebadsummer 0
brats parents should have their child under control.
CyclonePsycho 1
You know Twinklestar, I am glad you are privileged enough to be able to fly first-class anytime you want. But the rest of us simply can't chose the more expensive options. It's not up to everyone else to adjust themselves accordingly because children are roaming around the plane like little demons. YOU need to control YOUR kids. Is it too much to ask that school-aged kids not act like maniacs in tight crowded spaces? Just because we expect that kind of crap doesn't mean we should tolerate it. Sure she was just going to the bathroom. But why wasn't she walking? Babies and toddlers acting up is one thing, but that girl should have been taught better than to run down the aisle of a plane. Nine years old is old enough to know how to behave in public. She's not "little" by any standards.
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Comments (130)
netfreak 0
lol nice
joeyisinsane 0
don't be a prostitute in Russia and you won't need insurance
RileyFerrari 0
The little girl deserved it. Running on a plane? Stupid.
Justforlolz 14
Owned. :D
BowserD 0
she won't be doing that anymore
WoGxFALLEN 0
he should consider going into WWE
belkinbra 12
This is so funny. She deserved it for running down the aisles.
fivehuskies 6
That dumb bitch deserved it.
Kajay1978 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
loser
flyinmysoup 0
maybe you shouldn't call him a loser, but rather "THE PUNISHER." There's a good chance that little girl will grow up and do some horrible, bitchy thing in the future. The OP just punished her preemptively.
Bojanglies 0
Loser? or Winner? I think this man has finally broken the man-slapping barrier that women have held sacred for years. Now let it be known, that men can clothesline little girls when they get out of control!
Shady_R 0
You're being awfully dramatic. It was an accident. The kid was out of control and if anyone did anything wrong, it was the parents who didn't have better control of their kid. By comparing it to partner abuse, you minimizing the awfulness that is partner abuse.
Thunderbender 2
#57 is my hero
crazytoaster 2
Why? He didn't clothesline the girl. Kids suck!
lovergirl7 1
ahaha this made my day :) thank you very much
guyfawke 5
the kid deserved it for running in an aircraft.
wazdog 4
That made me laugh.
koolitaliano 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
she deserves it, I hate little kids on planes, there should be an age limit. I hardly ever go on flights but there always seems to be a baby who won't stop crying and a little kid who keeps pressing the hostess button!!
Twinklestar 0
If you have no tolerance, don't be cheap and fly in business or first class.
CyclonePsycho 1
You know Twinklestar, I am glad you are privileged enough to be able to fly first-class anytime you want. But the rest of us simply can't chose the more expensive options. It's not up to everyone else to adjust themselves accordingly because children are roaming around the plane like little demons. YOU need to control YOUR kids. Is it too much to ask that school-aged kids not act like maniacs in tight crowded spaces? Just because we expect that kind of crap doesn't mean we should tolerate it. Sure she was just going to the bathroom. But why wasn't she walking? Babies and toddlers acting up is one thing, but that girl should have been taught better than to run down the aisle of a plane. Nine years old is old enough to know how to behave in public. She's not "little" by any standards.
hedgehogs 0
Babies sometimes have a lot of ear pain in the air, particularly at takeoff. Not fun for any of us, but it is painful and terrifying for them.
gingersnapper 0
Don't blame the kids, blame the lazy, indulgent parents. Whenever I fly Aeroflot, there's almost never any screaming kids. Why? The eastern European parents keep them from making a scene.
Twinklestar 0
Actually Cyclone, it's not up to everyone else to adjust their plans because you are intolerant. If you can't afford a car and take public transport, you have to deal with the other people taking public transport. If you can't afford to fly first class you have to deal with the fact that children will be on that flight and that babies will cry when their ears hurt, young children will get bored sitting for 10+ hours on long flights, and sometimes older children might run to the bathroom. If the kid on the OPs plane was "running around like a maniac" he would have heard her coming, so don't exaggerate. Most likely she was hurrying to the bathroom. Running to the bathroom is hardly misbehaving, especially if she is bored as hell on a long haul flight. Get a grip.
blazingman311 1
"There should be an age limit" ? What about families with young children? If you ask me, there should be an IQ limit for this website.
whataloadofbull 0
You guys take FML way too seriously. Just shut the hell up, read it, laugh, and move on to the next one. Jesus, this ain't a debate forum.
wordnerd42 0
Maybe because OP was watching a movie, and thus wearing headphones, he was unable to hear the little girl running down the isle?
cookeemonster 7
Yeah, I get that a lot too. Take off and landing stuffs up your sineses and creates a lot of pain in your ears and on either side of you nose
ElystTheBeast 11
An age limit?! Are you serious? Families all over the world need to travel for vacations and visitation to families.
onebadsummer 0
brats parents should have their child under control.
stillxsearching 3
this
sensboltsfan84 4
I agree that people need to control their children, but some children have special needs that prevent them from behaving.
arielhoee 9
Hahahahahha nice one! I'd probably do the same, only it wouldn't be an accident. ;]
jair_lhao 0
lol jajajaja bet she won't be running down the hall any more
thatssomeBS 9
I laughed at that...
amberbby69 6
Haha, i would've loved to seen your face and the faces of everyone around you. lol Oh well, the parent shouldn't even be mad. It's her fault for not being able to control her 9 year old daughter. Who just decides to run in an airplane?!
untoldfame 3
Number 7 has the worst stutter. Bet doesnt even start with the letter J.
SlightlyGPirate 0
Actually, they were probably intending on saying hahahaha but pressed j instead of h. that or they're from another country that say ja. I'm going with option 1.
sadistmonkey 19
no, it's just that the joke is lame
CyclonePsycho 1
Doesn't ja = ha in Spanish or some other language? I mean, the j in Spanish sounds a lot closer to the h in English than a Spanish h, so it makes sense.
Ascaryrobot 0
Saying Jajajaja is a thing from waaaay back on the internet, it's just a stupid mini-meme. It's like people saying Kekekeke and stuff like that.