Today, I was jogging when a woman ran out of her house and handed me an invitation for a party. What was the invitation for? A weight loss treatment party. Guess the jogging isn't working. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I proudly showed off my new body, after losing 80 pounds. My life-long best friend immediately uninvited me to her upcoming wedding, and won't explain why. FML
Today, I was at a party and saw this girl who used to be overweight. She'd lost a significant amount of weight and looked so good, I went to chat her up. She immediately told me to get lost. According to her, if I "didn’t appreciate her at her worst, I don’t deserve her at her best." FML
Today, I finally went running to help me start losing weight. I got 50 metres before someone in a passing car shouted out "Run fatty, run". I can't work up the courage to go for a run again. FML
Today, a girl I met recently asked if I wanted to go jogging with her, and I excitedly agreed. A while into our run, I ran out of breath and doubled over panting, all while she kept jogging and slowly disappeared down the street. What a way to spend time together. FML
Today, I went running for the first time in a few months. I had what I thought was an asthma attack. When I got home, I realized that it was not asthma, but instead I have gained so much weight that my running bra restricted my breathing. FML
Today, I went running. My girlfriend was so surprised at the fact that I'm exercising that she accused me of making it up so I could cheat on her. I'm just trying to get in shape. FML
Today, after several months of eating right, exercising, and weight loss, my mother has yet again arrived at my house, unannounced and with a very sugary cake. She's been doing this most weeks since I lost 50 pounds. FML
Today, for my birthday, my friend bought me a book on how to lose weight. FML
Today, I told my gym trainer I’d do anything to get in shape. He challenged me to run a mile without stopping. I agreed, then got winded halfway through and dramatically collapsed on the track. A 70 year-oldish woman jogged past me and said, “You’ll live.” FML
Today, I got an invite to my high school reunion. With visions of wowing my former classmates, I set about starting a diet and exercise regimen. The universe had other plans. On my first run out in the fields, I managed to trip over an invisible pebble, fall into a puddle, and fuck my ankle up. The only thing I'm reuniting with now is my couch and a bag of ice. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
JTthePurpleNinja 5
Jogging helps :) keep at it !
Mirorbo 27
Ugh... I know people think they're trying to help when they do stuff like this, but really, all it does is hurt the person's feelings and make you look like a total ass.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (81)
Enslaved 38
Jogging/power walking is one of the best ways to shed pounds off fast. But you need to include dieting to make it extra successful. Don't worry about that lady, she's just trying to make a living. Keep up the effort. (:
StoryOfTheYear 15
If I see a few new soccer moms powerwalking at the gym I'll know who to blame.
perdix 31
If a fat lady can bolt out of her house and run you down on the street, you may need to pick up your pace!
kikiluv 1
Lol
shazza26 1
Try and see the good side of it... Someone cares about your health!
FollowMe 2
Or you know in this world, they only want your money.
cheeseboy77 0
go to the party. all thin from your jogging. you most likely met a troll woman.
taazer 12
I wouldent see it as a bad thing.. Think if it as a opportunity to Meet new people and get more motivated to lose weight :)
jaccq 2
maybe she thought that you wanted to lose weight(even if you are slim) and was just trying to help? after all, many slim people think that they are fat! (: dont be demoralized by it!
Rachel1987 4
Agreed! :)
porcelainkisses 5
Atleast you're doing something about it, OP!! (:
texas_redneck88 10
So are you gonna go to the party?
DRSNICK3RS 2
Should have said " no thank you, you look like you need it more." :)
terrask 11
Isn't working??? Welcome to the real world where a healthy, steady and durable weight-loss is of about 1pound per week when you genuinely have too much fat. 52 weeks in a year, I'll let you do the math.