Today, I was jogging when a woman ran out of her house and handed me an invitation for a party. What was the invitation for? A weight loss treatment party. Guess the jogging isn't working. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I proudly showed off my new body, after losing 80 pounds. My life-long best friend immediately uninvited me to her upcoming wedding, and won't explain why. FML
Today, I was at a party and saw this girl who used to be overweight. She'd lost a significant amount of weight and looked so good, I went to chat her up. She immediately told me to get lost. According to her, if I "didn’t appreciate her at her worst, I don’t deserve her at her best." FML
Today, I finally went running to help me start losing weight. I got 50 metres before someone in a passing car shouted out "Run fatty, run". I can't work up the courage to go for a run again. FML
Today, a girl I met recently asked if I wanted to go jogging with her, and I excitedly agreed. A while into our run, I ran out of breath and doubled over panting, all while she kept jogging and slowly disappeared down the street. What a way to spend time together. FML
Today, I went running for the first time in a few months. I had what I thought was an asthma attack. When I got home, I realized that it was not asthma, but instead I have gained so much weight that my running bra restricted my breathing. FML
Today, I went running. My girlfriend was so surprised at the fact that I'm exercising that she accused me of making it up so I could cheat on her. I'm just trying to get in shape. FML
Today, after several months of eating right, exercising, and weight loss, my mother has yet again arrived at my house, unannounced and with a very sugary cake. She's been doing this most weeks since I lost 50 pounds. FML
Today, for my birthday, my friend bought me a book on how to lose weight. FML
Today, I told my gym trainer I’d do anything to get in shape. He challenged me to run a mile without stopping. I agreed, then got winded halfway through and dramatically collapsed on the track. A 70 year-oldish woman jogged past me and said, “You’ll live.” FML
Today, I got an invite to my high school reunion. With visions of wowing my former classmates, I set about starting a diet and exercise regimen. The universe had other plans. On my first run out in the fields, I managed to trip over an invisible pebble, fall into a puddle, and fuck my ankle up. The only thing I'm reuniting with now is my couch and a bag of ice. FML
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Top comments
JTthePurpleNinja 5
Jogging helps :) keep at it !
Mirorbo 27
Ugh... I know people think they're trying to help when they do stuff like this, but really, all it does is hurt the person's feelings and make you look like a total ass.
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Comments (81)
iliketurdles 7
Or, she just had no one to invite so she targeted joggers? Seems like a logical demographic.
graham11 14
Jogging helps a lot:) it just takes time.. Be patient and keep at it. You'll see results soon:)
dancer_is_hawt 3
Maybe she thought that since you were jogging, you wanted to lose weight so invited you because you were the type of person she wanted to have at her party. Doesn't mean you're fat.
xxtb0 0
well how long have you been jogging? you don't turn into a supermodel overnight. i say brush it off and continue what you're doing, op. i could never say that im going to start working out and never go through with it, haha.
xxtb0 0
*and actually go through with it.. oops
elkied 8
maybe she thought you could help with the program :D keep up the jogging!
summerwummer 2
Ugh that woman is totally asking for a good ol house egging!
motorcyclematt 0
Sounds it's not working, it sounds like she caught up to you too easily.
ashley0703 0
She prolly only did it cause she knew you were tryin to lose weight and was gonna be nice and give it to you
BrittRoxx101 7
Aww its okay at least your trying
frokeyman92 9
Jogging and a good diet you can loose up to five pounds in 2 weeks. Keep it up!