Today, I was in my family's hotel room taking a dump. The lock to the bathroom was broken so we had made a deal: when the door is closed, someone is using the toilet. The maid didn't know that. She punched me in the face because she claimed I scared her. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I went in the one-person bathroom at work to pee. Next thing I know, a woman forced the locked door open and walked in on me, because she didn't believe another person who said, "I think someone is in there." I'm reluctant to use that bathroom in the future. FML
Today, my supervisor locked me in the women's bathroom as I was cleaning it. I heard the owner scolding him, so I waited for the door to open, thinking he got in trouble. It wasn't until I heard the front gate locking that I realized I'm staying the night in the bathroom. FML
Today, I was using the restroom when a little girl tried to open my stall. It was locked, so she slid under the door and tried to have a conversation with me while I was pooping. FML
Today, I was taking a dump in the bathroom. The lights turned off and I was too embarrassed to come out of the stall. The janitor walked in, turned the lights on and asked If anyone was there. I stayed quiet. He turned the lights back off and locked me in the bathroom. FML
Today, I was taking a shit in my friend's bathroom when his brother's girlfriend walked in. Nobody decided to tell me that the lock didn’t work. FML
Today, I was standing in the shower drying off when my sister came in the bathroom. She must have thought I was a burglar because she hit the shower curtain and punched me in the face. FML
Today, I took my brother to the bathroom at a restaurant. The stall next to mine was locked, so I assumed he was still in there. I yelled his name a few times, then banged on the door out of annoyance. I gave up and returned to the table, where he was sitting with a grin. Turns out I just traumatized a poor lady in the stall. FML
Today, at work, after a visit to the bathroom, the lock broke in my hand and the door was jammed. I called the janitor on my cellphone and told him about the situation. He told me to fill out a complaint and leave it in his post box. He then hung up. FML
Today, at work, I was on my break when I had to use the bathroom. I was on the toilet taking a dump when the door latch loosened and the door swung open. The little girl standing there took one look and screamed. Security busted in. My pants were still down. FML
Today, while on a road trip, I went to the bathroom at a gas station and locked the door. Turns out the lock was automatic and I'd actually unlocked it. My mom walked in on me, but instead of apologizing and leaving, she yelled at me in the middle of the gas station. FML
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Top comments
A7X_LoVeee 10
I guess you could say...you scared the shit out of her!
futtbuck101 1
That's a shitty situ- *shot in the face*
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Comments (128)
alex6946 10
you should report her.. lmao that little scene i imagined in my head made me laugh (:
unluckiestperson_fml 14
Maybe the stench startled her.
Jitter 0
no comment sir.
NeatNit 33
That's weird. I see one.
cockseverywhere 2
haha 32. you're my favorite type of person. C: people are so dumb
siege10 0
this statement is false
docdizz 0
so what you are saying is that you pee with the door open.
unluckiestperson_fml 14
It was a poop and there was no lock.
techweed 12
Kung-Fu that motherf*cker!!!
mintcar 10
Were you able to finish pooping?
lmaoatall 6
she actually took the time to make it all the ways over to where you were on the shitter to hit you. I would wipe my ass on the walls for that! get a do not disturb sign for the bathroom door.
7mood75 7
I don't understand why the showers are always exposed to everyone in the room.
NeatNit 33
Your family is dumb. If the lock is broken, tell the hotel administration and they'll either fix it or give you a new room. YDI
MrXerxes5 6
Go sue them