Today, I was getting intimate with my husband, and I tried to do a swift position-change like they do in the movies. I wound up flipping off the bed and busting my nose open on the floor. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my husband and I were getting frisky. All was going well until I decided to go down on him, causing him to freak out, thinking I was going for his butt, ending the night with a black eye from being knee'd in the face. FML
Today, in the middle of sex, my husband accidentally headbutted me, almost knocking me unconscious. FML
Today, after a long dry spell, I spent a day treating my wife, ending with a full body massage. She was wearing only panties, breathing heavily, and spread her legs, so I reached for her crotch to finger her… and she kicked me in the head so hard I fell off the bed and split my head open. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. Feeling goofy, I thought it’d be funny to try to reenact that horrible sex scene from the movie Showgirls. I threw my body back, but completely lost my balance and smashed my head on the headboard. I ended up with a bad concussion and a huge hospital bill. FML
Today, I was fooling around with my partner after his shower. He moved my hands up to push me against the wall. Instead of hitting the wall, my hands hit the shower rod. It fell on my face and I got a bloody nose. FML
Today, my husband thought it would be romantic to pick me up and fall on the bed with me while we were kissing. Our faces smashed together as we hit the bed, and my tongue is still bleeding on and off. FML
Today, I was going down on my boyfriend when he stood up on the bed to get a different experience. I started to get aggressive and pushed him up against the wall. I forgot our bed was on wheels and the bed started sliding away and his body slid down the wall. So much for being sexy. FML
Today, as I was on the floor playing with the dog, my husband walked past, tripped over something, and fell on me, smashing his bony elbow right into my crotch. FML
Today, my fiancé and I attempted to have sex in my childhood bedroom. As we were falling onto the bed, I smacked my head on the wall, which caused a shelf of stuffed toys to fall onto the bed. Not only did it kill the mood, the shelf also hit me in the face. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were getting intimate on the bathroom floor. Somehow my nose managed to start bleeding, so he bent me over the tub and kept going because he didn't want to "ruin the moment". FML
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Top comments
Tripartita 45
You were aiming for porno but life threw you a romantic comedy.
tumtum888 12
**** stunts are for pros only lol
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Comments (43)
teentee401 37
It's probably a rule of thumb to not base sex off of what you see on TV or in movies.
dirty_dan_ 15
Maybe you should try being a bit more careful haha. Have fun coming up with stories to tell the doctor
Kr1ket927 15
Totally something I would do lol.
emi_alejandra 23
Imagine trying to explain that to the doctors
SunshineBoy_fml 16
Try harder the next time! Put pillows all over the floor..
pandemonium307 10
I guess they need to put a do not try this at home, these are done by professionals disclaimer for you in the movies you're watching.
sirdannyboy1 20
Doesn't sound very sexy.
asiansapphire 10
**** movies should say as wwe, don't try this at home for such stunts.
hunnykhan 11
happens when you are married... those stunts are probably better outside marriage ;)
Xandriajoy10 18
You can break a penis doing crazy shit like that, which would require surgery. I'm not a man, but I'm fairly sure that isn't something they'd want to experience