Today, I was finally given a parking spot at work. It turns out to be between an expensive sports car that never parks straight and a giant truck too big for its space. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I had to come to terms with the truth that I'm absolutely terrible at parallel parking. After three failed attempts, I finally gave up and parked in a spot labeled "No Parking" just to make it stop. Of course, a car pulled in right behind me and blocked me in. FML
Today, I thought I'd found the perfect parking spot at work for once. Turns out, it was actually perfect for the parade that was scheduled for later in the day. My car got towed to make way for marching bands and floats. FML
Today, I was parking my car outside of my apartment, but the big truck next to the spot went over the line. I squeezed in anyway. Later, I discovered the truck had left and someone keyed my car. They left a note saying, "Good parking job, asshole." FML
Today, the last parking space outside my work was tiny but I tried to parallel park there in desperation. A school kid saw the whole attempt and sarcastically clapped me as I gave up and drove away. FML
Today, I'm so bad at parking that I saw the guy next to me openly cringe as I pulled into a spot. FML
Today, after I arrived at work, somebody crashed into my parked car and left a big dent. The impact pushed my car up onto the curb and I got a parking ticket. FML
Today, I found a parking spot in front of my work. I parked and another car pulled into the spot just in front of me. The next thing I know, the car in front backs up and slams into my car. Turns out she didn't notice the fire hydrant next to her spot and screamed at me cause I, "stole her spot." FML
Today, I had to drive through a parking lot that they fucked up so bad that you have to put your car in reverse to go around it. I have to go there 6 times a week. FML
Today, when leaving my apartment, I instantly noticed there was a giant dump truck in our lot, which turned out to be directly behind my car. After making a 20-point escape from my parking space and getting to work late, my roommate texts me, "DUDE guess what I got last night." A giant dump truck. FML
Today, I walked to work. I later discovered that my husband had parked my car in a no-parking area. My job is towing cars. I had to tow my own car. FML
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Top comments
zaynakins 12
great! you can be that guy who always has half his car parked out of the parking spot.
jelly_bennett 23
Maybe your boss will be generous enough to give you a new one?
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Comments (90)
Omniprism 15
Get there before they do or leave a note to the sports car.
TheNewGuy03 29
You could always park directly behind them, which would force them to talk to you. The downside is that you will equal or surpass their douchiness, *and* you might get your car towed. Life's decisions. You're better off leaving a note on the car, or taking down the license plate number and reporting the person to your boss (unless the owner of the sports car *is* your boss, which would render you as helpless as a lamb).
worldclassrager 41
Invest in a motor scooter or a motorcycle?
auctiongirl 10
Pull in and climb out the trunk.
GreenMonster68 11
Show up before them
JKPwnage 27
Looks like the always-tap-"you-deserved-it" trolls just skipped over this one
Faeryl_fml 6
Show up early and park properly, let the inconsiderate people figure out what to do
thelaxersvlog 9
Get there earlier to beat them to it
lifesabish 9
1- Get there first. 2- Leave matching notes saying something along the lines of just because THEIR dicks are small doesn't mean you should have to damage their pretty paint jobs. 3- Show your superiority by bringing a really hot chick to the next work gathering (this one works if you are male or female).
TwentyFourBeerz 18
I hate when people do that, I still pull in. If they can't get in than oh well. Get over it