Today, I was eating lunch when my grandmother came over and started watching me. Suddenly she said, "I see you're getting breasts". I'm a guy. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was talking to my grandmother, who was lying down on the couch under a blanket watching TV. As I was leaving, I said "See you later Nana," and patted her on the shoulder. Her shoulder was soft, and moved more than I expected. It was her boob. I felt up my grandma. FML
Today, I was eating lunch with my grandmother when a very muscular young man entered the restaurant. As soon as he walked in, my 70-year-old widowed grandmother looked at him and said, out loud, "Ooh, eye candy!" Everyone in the restaurant began staring at us, and the poor guy's face was red as a tomato. FML
Today, I was finally having a conversation with my granny, who I don't get to see often. First thing she tells me was that she was going to have surgery soon, because her "women's insides" were "dangling out." FML
Today, I was feeling really down and insecure after a friend joked about how small my boobs are. When my grandma got me to tell her what happened, she reassured me that all the girls in our family were late bloomers. I said "Really?" and she replied, "Oh no dear. Quite the opposite." FML
Today, I was at a restaurant with my grandma. A young, ripped gentleman suddenly walked through the door and my grandma looked at him and shouted, "Look! Eye candy!" as loud as she could. He heard it and was extremely embarrassed. To make it worse, my grandma is a widow, so she might have actually meant it. FML
Today, my grandma and her neighbor compared their sports bras in front of me. FML
Today, my grandmother said to me, "You look just like your mother did at your age. Except you're fatter of course." FML
Today, away at college, I called my grandmother to hear how she was doing after her knee surgery. She ended up talking about Hooters and how I should work there because of my "rare body". When I mentioned I've been studying computer science, earning a 3.8 GPA, she replied, "But you're a girl." FML
Today, I told my mom I was excited my boobs were getting bigger. She told me that that's what happens when you get fat. FML
Today, I was having breakfast when my mom's boyfriend came and sat right across from me. He didn't try and hide the fact that he was staring at my chest and told me, "Wow, you're getting bigger." I glared at him. He winked at me. FML
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Top comments
Ranimal 12
Elderly people for the win, again.
grahmagog 14
I got the moobs like jabba
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Comments (76)
ocampo 6
maybe she wants you to take the hint
tomgun_fml 16
At least it was your grandma who told you it could of Been worst you never now who might just give a wink
graceinsheepwear 34
Gynecomastia is one possibility-it's a medical condition.
WhiteCrimson 23
You have one cool grandma.... Leave it to the old timers to set the record straight without major implications... Or you just need to lay off the roids man.
Zeke10 12
Stop snacking when you're bored, and hit the gym.
imtooshy 18
I'm jealous and have breast envy of a guy ;)
Arthur_Corey_E 7
Maybe your just fat so its your own fault
PoisonedLiquor 17
#34, you're probably fat anyway. Seeing as you're getting on your high horse calling others "fat". Maybe OP's not fat and is just a bit bulkier than others - perfectly normal. Not to mention, being fat is really out of question. A boy I went to school with wasn't "fat" yet he had moobs. Some have genetic/medical conditions.
upallnight11 19
Just work them man boobs! No need to be ashamed. Well... Maybe a little.
kewpiesuicide 29
Hopefully you just have moobs from being chubby; those are easy to deal with. Gynoclymastia requires surgery.
SiegeOfTheSiren 9
"Yes, grandma...they are probably bigger than yours."
RedPillSucks 33
Not something to brag about.