Today, I was driving home. I desperately needed the bathroom, so I was speeding a little bit. A cop pulled me over and gave me hell. He said he'd heard my story a hundred times and didn't believe me. I couldn't hold it and ended up marinating in my own piss while he ran my plates. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, while driving home I had to pee really bad, so I speeded up to get home quicker. I got pulled over for speeding and peed my pants. The cop, assuming I was drunk, made me take a sobriety test. I had to walk a straight line with piss all over my pants at 2:00 in the afternoon. FML
Today, I drove 100 miles from my parents' house to mine. I had only a few miles left when I realized I really had to pee. I didn't want to pull over somewhere when I was so close to home, so I sped up. A cop pulled me over a block from my house. I started to sob, and ended up peeing myself. FML
Today, I was pulled over for speeding. The cop asked if I had a reason for going so fast. I panicked and said, “I have to poop.” He followed me home with lights on, just to make sure I made it. FML.
Today, I was on a long road trip and I really had to pee. With no rest stop for miles and night having fallen, I decided to pull over on the side of the highway and pee in a fast food cup. A cop knocked on the window to see if everything was okay, while I was mid-squat. FML
Today, a cop car was tailing me. I was scared, and trying to avoid any tickets, I drove straight through a huge pothole rather than swerving to avoid it. The cop pulled me over and insisted I was intoxicated, because, "anybody in their right mind would've dodged that pothole." FML
Today, while driving my son and his friend home, I was so frantic to pee, I was bouncing up and down in my seat. I stopped and ran into a store but it was too late. There was a line and I made it 11 seconds. I was radiating heat from the humiliation of walking past dozens of people after peeing my pants. I even apologized. FML
Today, I was smoking while driving. A cop pulled me over and asked if I knew what I did wrong. I thought he could smell the tobacco, so I decided to just admit it. As it turns out, I was going well over the speed limit. FML
Today, I got pulled over for a broken taillight. When I rolled down the window, the cop asked me if I was smoking crack. When I told him I didn't do drugs, he didn't believe me since he could detect a foul odor coming from my car. I'd just passed gas big time. FML
Today, I got pulled over for speeding. I tried to make a joke to ease the tension and said, "I’m just trying to keep up with the traffic!" The officer looked around at the empty road and said, "What traffic? Are you under the influence? HANDS ON THE WHEEL!" It went downhill from there. FML
Today, I was driving home from work when I saw a cop come up behind me. Nervous about my expired license, I kept checking in my rear view mirror. In turn since I wasn't paying attention, I ran a stop sign. Needless to say the cop pulled me over and gave me 2 tickets. FML
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Top comments
Blackhawk706 23
Next time just stop at a gas station
jaspinkgrl01 18
Well...did he still give you the ticket?
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Comments (61)
justsayingbeach 15
Driving needing the toilet has been proven to be more dangerous than drink driving... Seriously Google it.
beeferjay 34
not true, I caused a 99 car pile up due to the pepsi
vikky538 29
You could have asked him... Can i use your bathroom?
melanielovejeff 15
I know exactly how you feel. When I was 16, I was a cashier at McDonalds. The employees were told that we are not allowed to use the bathroom during 12-1pm, because during the lunch rush, they need everyone working on the floor. I peed myself while taking someone's order. I had to walk around in my pee filled shoes until the lunch rush was over. Afterwards, I asked one of the managers for a change of clothes pretending that I got my period. OP- hopefully your next day is better than what you just went through.
middlenamefrank 8
How hard is it to go before you get in the car? Didn't your mom and dad teach you that years ago?
Catdragon 40
I didn't have to go pee until halfway through the trip. my brother refused to pull over or stop in one of the numerous places along the way. it was so bad I started crying. he just laughed at me. I contemplated jumping out of the car just to get to a bathroom. luckily, we made it to a bathroom before I pissed myself.
SPN_lover666 27
How do you know OP didn't? I have an overactive bladder which makes it hard for me to go more than 20 minutes without having the urge to pee. That means even if I pee before I leave to go somewhere, I feel the urge to pee again.
ndnpride88 25
Should've got out and did what you had to do on side the road. That way you'd have a legitimate reason for a ticket.
nitrog100 21
Bad idea. These days, there's a decent chance OP be shot in the back for fleeing.
CliffyB03 28
Just imagine if you had to poop. I think I would be in tears while he ran my information
rogwest 23
That's when you get out an piss on the tire right in front of him!
LilMissCanadian 22
I would have sprayed it at his face. For proof, of course.
phreaker913 21
just piss on the cop.
cynthianicole95 9
It's not that hard to hold it. Even though it's unhealthy for you.
theamazingd 17
There does come a point where your body says, "Nope, not holding it anymore." Congrats, #47 for having a bladder of steel, you lucky duck.