youdontknowmewhy
Keller, United States
Today, I was called a selfish brat for asking for a pillow as my birthday present. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Anonymous
United States
How could you?
Today, my mom called me a bastard because I asked for the Target gift card my dad had given to me. FML
Anonymous
I hate surprises
Today, my family and friends threw a surprise birthday party for me, after I'd said multiple times that I didn't want one. I turned and left and now everybody is angry at me and calling me ungrateful and spoiled. FML
BirthdayBoy
Madison, United States
Today, I was uninvited from my own birthday party. FML
MeanMother
Saint Louis, United States
Today, I realized just how much of a bitch I am when I grounded my son for not telling me what he got me for my birthday. FML
A……
United States
This going to be fun
Today, my wife asked me what I wanted for my upcoming birthday. Mindful of our budget, I said I just wanted to relax at home all day and then get a nice dinner with her. She blew up and yelled that I'm "using my birthday to be a lazy slug." FML
happy21sttome
United Kingdom
Ironic
Today, after five years in a row of my family doing absolutely nothing to even acknowledge my birthday, I got train tickets to see my boyfriend for the weekend and celebrate with him. I woke up to six angry texts about how I'm "selfish" for not staying at home with my family. FML
Anonymous
It isn't
Today, it's my birthday, none of my friends wished me a thing. I spent the whole day crying and then decided to call few of them and sobbingly demanded an explanation. Most of them didn't pick up, the rest called me a drama queen, saying that my birthday isn't as important as I think. FML
Anon
Calgary, Canada
Birthday Bitch
Today, I received an angry phone call from a friend whose birthday party I missed last night. Yesterday, I gave birth to my son. She claims that I ruined her party and demands I still bring her a birthday gift. FML
Anonymous
Floral Park, United States
Priorities
Today, my mother flipped out that I spent $20 on a gift for myself for my birthday. Instead of getting a gift for me, she spent $300 on a new vacuum cleaner, and claims that we didn't have enough left in our budget to spend on me. FML
blank sheep at work
Richland, United States
Pulled a sneaky on you
Today, I found out that my work threw me a birthday party alongside my coworker’s birthday. Said coworker spread a rumor, telling everyone that I wanted each person to buy me flowers and cake. Everyone thought that I was a weirdo for asking for those things from them. I wasn't at work today. FML
Top comments
assurant 12
unless the pillow is made of solid gold then they are a selfish brat. FYL
summer4me 25
There's nothing wrong with wanting a little comfort in life
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Comments (80)
summer4me 25
There's nothing wrong with wanting a little comfort in life
Anonypus 20
Such a brat for wanting to be comfortable!!1!1!!1!
NathanTheJuggla6 3
Hold down the shift bar when hitting the 1 key. Don't put ones in with exclamation points, dude
immortalhmars 14
It's part of the joke m8
Anonypus 20
I did it purposely, but thanks for the advice
iseebearbears 27
Please explain the joke, because despite my many attempts, I just don't get it.
Anonypus 20
It's sarcasm, but I didn't want to put mind the sarcasm because I'm lazy so I just added ones with my exclamation marks
Aimeejasmine 15
Oh my god shut up it's just a few ones chill
mds9986 24
33- using ones with exclamation points is used to express sarcasm. The idea is you are so super excited about something that you accidentally add ones to a series of exclamation points because you are mashing the keys as you type.
Brandi_Faith 34
Never heard of the 1's for sarcasm before.
bandaidstations 28
Thank you 45. I always wondered how so many people did that without wanting to fix it.
5secondsofvvifi 21
Or if you're on mobile you could always just hold the exclamation a bit longer to get ¡ But I think the ones suit sarcasm better.
I_Bite 22
we used to use (!) for sarcasm. . the 1s male more sense
MossyMegaMan 20
Gr8 h8 b8 m8
FunnyStranger 7
this joke is outrageous!! too many 1s!!! :p
assurant 12
unless the pillow is made of solid gold then they are a selfish brat. FYL
exoticDeath 20
I wish I had more information about this...it's just a pillow.
trey600rr 22
I am sure it was a large textured body pillow. That's what my daughter asked for.
kellyem2 20
Agreed. Context would be good here.
tylercarolinex 21
Happy birthday OP, that's not selfish, at all. Unless it was diamond encrusted..
ColdRoxas 18
selfish for wanting comfort? only in texas
big_country12 17
Easy there bud, not all Texans are like that
cattisanerd 9
It says OP is from Colorado...
abbyade 21
I wonder why they called you that. Everyone deserves a nice pillow. Don't be offended OP, just overlook them.
mutiplyyou 20
FYL how hard is it to spend $20 on a pillow for someones birthday. They are the selfish assholes.
leogachi 15
Where are you spending $20 on a single pillow? You're paying too much for your stuff.
IndigoPhlo 6
I mean, I have a body pillow in my dorm that was 15 and then another 10 for the cover. And even still, 20 isn't a lot for a birthday gift, especially if it's something practical.
_Reign_ 15
That seems unfair OP. I can understand if you just got new ones before hand. But it sounds like that's not the case. Also there is a loop hole, ask for just plain cash for your birthday and buy yourself a pillow. Or maybe some gift cards to places like Target or Bed Bath And Beyond.
Welshite 40
You spoiled youngsters wanting soft pillows and such. Back in my day we used rocks for pillows and used animals as blankets.
NotAKumquat 4
Ah the good old days where we walked up hills both ways just to go to school
Brandi_Faith 34
...barefoot in the snow.
Geckosrock99 33
With only a belt to hold our books.