Today, I was at my sister's wedding. Everything was going flawlessly. That is, until our visibly drunk mom started a punch-up over who got to cut the cake first. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was supposed to get married. I called it off only 20 minutes before the ceremony was supposed to begin because I saw my fiance punch his own mother in the face. FML
Today, I went to pick up my sister's wedding cake. It was a nice day, the shop was close, and the cake wasn't too big so I walked. On my way back, I stepped aside for a kid on a bike, tripped over my shoelaces, and dumped my sister's expensive, custom-designed cake. The wedding is tomorrow. FML
Today, my son took his very first steps. Unfortunately, it was during my sister's wedding. She had a full-blown bridezilla meltdown over how he "stole her spotlight". FML
Today, I stood too fast, got dizzy, and fell over. I fell on the grandmother of the bride, pushing her into the wedding cake table. Cake ruined, grandmother in hospital for a broken arm, and everybody mad at me. FML
Today, as I’m single, I got permission to bring a friend as my plus-one to my sister's wedding. He’s religious so I thought of all people he’d be one to behave. Nope. He got plastered on champagne, slapped the brides ass as she was walking down the aisle with our dad, then started a fight. FML
Today, I got into a fight with my mom because she believes that my fiancé is "irresponsible" and "immature". I stormed out and drove back home. There, I walked in on my fiancé and his friends. They were in a heated and almost violent argument over which CSI is the best. The wedding's next month. FML
Today, I was at my best friend's wedding. As she threw the bouquet, I was punched in the face by another bridesmaid. Later, as I was explaining what had happened, I punched myself in the face. FML
Today, my mother thought it would be a wonderful idea to make me late for me own wedding. It wouldn't be so bad if she hadn't focused solely on my sister because my wedding didn't center on her. The sister in question snubbed being my maid of honor over a year ago, and just decided to randomly show up. FML
Today, I was the maid of honor at my sister's wedding. I was the first one to walk down the aisle, where I managed to trip over a wire, shutting off the music and falling on my face. My family cheered and took pictures. FML
Today, minutes before I walked down the aisle at my wedding, my drunk mother stumbled up to me and told me she was depressed and wanted to leave. FML
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Top comments
tayza249 20
Mmmm.. Cake
every1luvsboners 11
Don't cut the cake. There's a midget stripper in there with the biggest bawls in the world. Yes I know, don't ask how.
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Comments (79)
1bluesky1 6
I think it would be wise not to trust your mom with knives.
Minorchord 4
You had the pointless snide remarks of hammerhead sharks. The pot will call the kettle black... it's a drunken punch-up at a wedding.
vbmg152 19
Isn't this your sisters FML? not yours!
Enslaved 38
It's still embarrassing for the OP since it's her drunk mother making the scene. I'm sure the bride would have written it but she's most likely busy on her honeymoon. (:
RockstarRN 10
Is a punch-up like a beat-down??
rattusrattus 19
Traditionally, a beat-down is more one-sided than a punch-up.
The_Great_Zucchi 15
OP, this would be the perfect time to put in for a family-transfer, preferably one where people can hold their liquor or at a bare minimum have the decency to wait till the official bit of the wedding is over.
SxeDaze 13
She started a punch up because someone in the crowd brought up "the cake is a lie."
cdh531 0
soo who got to cut the cake??
daydreamer244 13
if only you had wedding security.
Sebastian_NG 17
No, no, no, no, no, no No, no, no, no, no, no No, no, no, no, no, no No, no, no, no, no, no No, no, no, no, no, no No, no, no, no, no, no No, no, no, no, no, no I don't know why you bother Nothing's ever good enough for you (By the way) I was there It wasn't like that You've come here just to start a fight You had to piss on our parade You had to shred our big day You had to ruin it for all concerned In a drunken punch-up at a wedding, yeah Hypocrite opportunist Don't infect me with your poison A bully in a china shop When I turn around, you stay frozen to the spot You had the pointless snide remarks Of hammerheaded sharks The pot will call the kettle black It's a drunken punchup at a wedding, yeah Oh, no, no To anyone who got that I luvs u
patrickalamo 48
Punch-up???? WTF