Today, I was at my sister's wedding. Everything was going flawlessly. That is, until our visibly drunk mom started a punch-up over who got to cut the cake first. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was supposed to get married. I called it off only 20 minutes before the ceremony was supposed to begin because I saw my fiance punch his own mother in the face. FML
Today, I went to pick up my sister's wedding cake. It was a nice day, the shop was close, and the cake wasn't too big so I walked. On my way back, I stepped aside for a kid on a bike, tripped over my shoelaces, and dumped my sister's expensive, custom-designed cake. The wedding is tomorrow. FML
Today, my son took his very first steps. Unfortunately, it was during my sister's wedding. She had a full-blown bridezilla meltdown over how he "stole her spotlight". FML
Today, I stood too fast, got dizzy, and fell over. I fell on the grandmother of the bride, pushing her into the wedding cake table. Cake ruined, grandmother in hospital for a broken arm, and everybody mad at me. FML
Today, as I’m single, I got permission to bring a friend as my plus-one to my sister's wedding. He’s religious so I thought of all people he’d be one to behave. Nope. He got plastered on champagne, slapped the brides ass as she was walking down the aisle with our dad, then started a fight. FML
Today, I got into a fight with my mom because she believes that my fiancé is "irresponsible" and "immature". I stormed out and drove back home. There, I walked in on my fiancé and his friends. They were in a heated and almost violent argument over which CSI is the best. The wedding's next month. FML
Today, I was at my best friend's wedding. As she threw the bouquet, I was punched in the face by another bridesmaid. Later, as I was explaining what had happened, I punched myself in the face. FML
Today, my mother thought it would be a wonderful idea to make me late for me own wedding. It wouldn't be so bad if she hadn't focused solely on my sister because my wedding didn't center on her. The sister in question snubbed being my maid of honor over a year ago, and just decided to randomly show up. FML
Today, I was the maid of honor at my sister's wedding. I was the first one to walk down the aisle, where I managed to trip over a wire, shutting off the music and falling on my face. My family cheered and took pictures. FML
Today, minutes before I walked down the aisle at my wedding, my drunk mother stumbled up to me and told me she was depressed and wanted to leave. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
tayza249 20
Mmmm.. Cake
every1luvsboners 11
Don't cut the cake. There's a midget stripper in there with the biggest bawls in the world. Yes I know, don't ask how.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (79)
Buttsexpirate 9
For some reason I misread this fml as if the mom punched their cake.
perdix 31
You should have compromised and let her cut the cheese first.
DemonicFatty 2
Great mom you got there...
trollsemen 8
Did she get her way??
cubbiesfan4life 0
oh wow.. your life's fd now???
Keyman1212 14
Challenge declined.
Nbrandwine 7
I believe it's; Challenge Denied
Mrsa7x 1
I think we are all thinking this.... what flavor was the cake??
perdix 31
I was thinking what kind of attention hog the OP is that what happens at her sister's wedding makes HER life ******.
satph 12
mmm yep i completely agree... yumm CAKE
Brandi_Faith 34
I think the sister wrote this as an fml because it was an experience she had, she was there, and she probably felt horrible for her sister! Plus, even if she wasn't writing it in a 'behalf of her sister' way, that would still be incredibly embarassing for her!! Your at an event where almost all your family, your family's friends, and your friends are at and your mother gets drunk and goes on a freakin rampage trying to cut the cake instead of the bride and groom. That's just messed up and embarassing for everyone there! Doesn't mean she's an attention hog or thinks it was worse for her than her sister! Just saying.
Brandi_Faith 34
I think the sister wrote this as an fml because it was an experience she had, she was there, and she probably felt horrible for her sister! Plus, even if she wasn't writing it in a 'behalf of her sister' way, that would still be incredibly embarassing for her!! Your at an event where almost all your family, your family's friends, and your friends are at and your mother gets drunk and goes on a freakin rampage trying to cut the cake instead of the bride and groom. That's just messed up and embarassing for everyone there! Doesn't mean she's an attention hog or thinks it was worse for her than her sister! Just saying.
Brandi_Faith 34
Posted twice. Sorry.
Enslaved 38
Okay, I'm a tad bit confused. In most weddings, doesn't the married couple cut the cake at the same time? Hand in hand with the knife?
Inspired22 11
Traditionally, yes. Apparently drunken asshole mothers don't go by tradition.
Holy_Schnikes 23
Maybe the mother wanted to be the one to do it and was upset she couldn't?
satph 12
more like f her life...
SmittyJA24 26
That's why funerals are better than weddings: there's one less drunken asshole family member at the funeral.
Llama_Face89 34
Hey now. I like being drunk at funerals. Makes it so much more amusing.
capslockisgood 19
MORE amusing? You are normally amused at the death of others?
Emerald202003 0
A drunken punch-up at a wedding. Sounds like a song I once heard.
x_KL_x 7
The wombats- My first wedding, by any chance?
massnerder420 4
Radiohead.
x_KL_x 7
Both are good