Today, I was at a restaurant where the host is an attractive guy with only one arm. I was with my family, so I didn't want to be too obvious when checking him out. It seems like I was, though, because he came over and told me it was rude to stare at his arm. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I saw a ridiculously hot guy dining with his family. I decided not to flirt with him with his parents around but to ask his sister (who went to the restroom) to give him my phone number. When I came back, I saw her pointing a finger at me, and the whole family turning around and staring. FML
Today, I went to a family dinner. While waiting to be seated, a guy walked by and I looked to see if he was hot. Then my grandma yelled, "Get your eyeballs back in your head and quit staring at boys!" The whole restaurant heard her. Including the guy. And yes, he was hot. FML
Today, I was working behind the bar at a club. After serving drinks to a guy, he asked me if I could carry them outside to the two girls waiting for him. I scowled at him and told him I wasn't a waitress. That's when I realised he had one arm. FML
Today, I was yelled at in public for staring at a guy in a wheelchair. I was staring because he was so good looking. FML
Today, I was at a coffee shop, trying to get to know the cute new barista. I wanted to compliment his nice eyes, but I got nervous and blurted out, "You have nice elbows!" He stared at me, confused, as I quickly grabbed my coffee and left. Now I can't even imagine going back there. FML
Today, I went to a restaurant with some friends. I noticed a very cute waitress about my age, so I walked over to her and asked if she had a boyfriend. The extremely fit, attractive waiter standing next to her immediately turned, held out his hand and goes, "Yeah. Meet me." FML
Today, I was having breakfast when my mom's boyfriend came and sat right across from me. He didn't try and hide the fact that he was staring at my chest and told me, "Wow, you're getting bigger." I glared at him. He winked at me. FML
Today, I was at the mall and I noticed this guy staring at me from across the food court. He smiled and waved at me so I walked over there and tried to talk to him. He was looking at his girlfriend the whole time. FML
Today, I saw a drunk guy hitting on a girl sitting alone at the bar. She insisted that her boyfriend was there, but he didn't relent. So I went over and put my arm around her and asked "Who's this guy?" He walked away, but then I felt a tap on my shoulder. It was her boyfriend. He broke my arm. FML
Today, I was having lunch at a cafe. There was an attractive guy looking at me from another table. I smiled back and gave a little wink. A minute later he approached me. I introduced myself and asked if he wanted my number. He said, "Um, no but what are you eating? It looks really good" FML
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Top comments
nonsensical 26
"Oh this is embarrassing, I'm sorry. I was actually checking you out. You're very attractive." THIS WOULD HAVE MADE HIS DAY.
jet223 20
Why don't you just tell him that he was attractive? Well you were with your parents so I guess that's not such a good idea. I guess your only choice now is to say you zoned out and accidentally stared at him. Or just yell really loud and run out of the restaurant.
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Comments (57)
beaglegal 42
Well I guess it wasn't very (h)armless.
NeatNit 33
Wait, I don't get it. Was he handsome or not?
NeatNit 33
you guys wouldn't know a good joke if you hit your toe in it like a STUMP.
Emma1562 35
I hope you told him that you just were looking because you thought he was attractive op
holaitsdez 12
yes, I was hoping the same thing
radiocaf 29
#2 & #14 me too. Perfect opportunity right there if you ask me.
jet223 20
Why don't you just tell him that he was attractive? Well you were with your parents so I guess that's not such a good idea. I guess your only choice now is to say you zoned out and accidentally stared at him. Or just yell really loud and run out of the restaurant.
Fiorella1 19
Yeah, it's perfectly normal, I do it all the time. I mean the yelling and running out part.
nonsensical 26
"Oh this is embarrassing, I'm sorry. I was actually checking you out. You're very attractive." THIS WOULD HAVE MADE HIS DAY.
Miss_Chevious 37
OP can always call him and tell him... that would still make his day
cksmith51 14
OP would need his number first to do that
bapbap_fml 15
Or call the restaurant. A customer was once very rude to me and called my work later to apologize.
AbtractAngela 17
She was with her family, that was the reason she didn't want to do anything like that in the first place.
_Reign_ 15
It would take an arm and a leg to recover from that awkward situation.
johncanact 13
If you have to force it, it's probably shit.
iPixelCheese 19
It's better you tell him the truth
disbatch 14
yeah, truth is gimp I was checking you out
BantasaurusRex 13
Tell. Him. Da. Truth.
laden_swallow09 35
"What? I was- Nooo… *giggle* I was checking /you/ out, big boy!" Boom. The Flirt-O-Matic 1000 saves you from social faux pas once again! Now, I just need to adjust the master motivator and the timing pins…
SouthernSmartass 5
That's when you tell him you were looking because he was attractive.
whitetiger13131 26
A chance to say something smooth like "I was just picturing it wrapped around me"
RedPillSucks 33
smoooooooth