Today, I've invited friends and family to my birthday party. I've also come home to find that my parents didn't pay the water bill. I either have to tell everyone I know that they are uninvited or not to take dumps in my house. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, I was uninvited from my own birthday party. FML
Today, it's my birthday. My parents, with whom I live, told me that they didn't get me anything, but instead they said they would knock off a bit of the housekeeping I owe them. FML
I hate surprises
Today, my family and friends threw a surprise birthday party for me, after I'd said multiple times that I didn't want one. I turned and left and now everybody is angry at me and calling me ungrateful and spoiled. FML
Today, I spent a lot of money buying a birthday gift for a close friend, only to find out I'm not even invited to the party. FML
No means no, Deborah
Today, it's my birthday. A month ago, I'd told everyone I invited to my party that it was going to be adults only. One of my friends brought her kids with her anyway, then started screaming and trashing the place when I politely asked her to leave. The cops had to be called to finally get her out of my house. FML
Today, my roommate forgot to pay the water bill on time, so they shut it off. Now we're without running water for 3 days and I'm taking my morning dump in Target next to a stranger. FML
Today, all of my friends bailed from the birthday party I was throwing myself. This was also after they had encouraged me for months to have one, knowing I'd never had my birthday celebrated before. FML
Get better locks
Today, my friends, led by my best friend, threw me a surprise party. Bearing a cake, they all happily yelled, "SURPRISE! HAPPY BIRTHDAY!" by suddenly barging in… through the bathroom door. I was on the toilet, in the middle of taking a dump. FML
Today, I found out that the day I moved out of my parents' house, they invited my whole family over and had a party to celebrate the fact that I was gone. FML
Party for one
Today, I invited all of my friends to my graduation party, and even paid for them all to be there. They all didn’t show. FML
Top comments
aaron123111 11
Invest in a bucket
DooleyFTW 17
You could just tell everyone that the water is temporarily cut off and leave a sign in the bathrooms or something like that!
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Comments (83)
AntiPrude 26
Get them to perch up on your compost bin and take a shit into there. Free manure. Good for the garden.
mannatee 19
Explain the situation, they'll understand
Kay_Noelle 11
that most have been some shitty party.. no? ok.
patrickalamo 48
Rent a portapotty and blame the water being off on a plumbers mistake.
skittles_kitten 4
Oh that's all right, op. There's no shame in saying your water temporarily not running. Happy birthday !
rgri 11
Go to bowling, pool hall, park, etc. Some places let you hold a party there for free, just tell them you dont want to pay for any games just use their space. They don't usually charge for that because you are bringing a group that most likely will pay to play anyways.
brandoneyez1 25
You can rent a port a john and get some antibacterial...or have your party somewhere else. Problem solved. Enjoy your party.
omgbrainZ_fml 24
Tell your friends that your sister blocked them all. :P
perdix 31
Oh, you need an excuse to tell people not to take dumps at your house? I always tell my guests at the front door to take their shoes off and they're not allowed to shit in my house. I don't get much company . . .
TwistedCherub1 15
We have a friend who makes a point to wreck the bathroom every time he visits any of us. I make a point of telling him he may not go in our house. I threatened to remove the toilet seat and TP.
masterof1 7
make #2s in a garbage bag around the toilet lid, dispose afterward