Today, I tried to be kind to animals and get my dad to buy cage-free eggs. When I told him it was dollar more, he started yelling and making a scene in the middle of the store, saying that chickens are ugly and they deserve to suffer. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was denounced for being a terrible person, because my family raises chickens, some of which we eat. I was then told how cruel I am for "killing innocent birds" and that "good" people buy their meat from the supermarket. FML
Today, as I fed my dog his dinner of chicken offal, a drumstick, a wing, a mackerel, and a raw egg, my dad bitched and moaned that I waste money feeding him meat instead of just buying the cheapest kibble at the store. FML
Today, I argued with my roommate about which eggs to buy: organic, pasture-raised, free-range, or AI-verified climate-positive. We settled on whatever was cheapest. They were $9. FML
Today, I was at the fish store asking if they were hiring. My stepdad decided to humiliate me by screaming at them repeatedly that I'm a good person and that I deserve the job. FML
Today, my dad got into an argument with the cashier about how overpriced the scented tampons were. FML
Today, I was in a store with my dad. He completely lost his temper and began yelling at the store owners. For some reason, he then removed his shirt in protest. FML
Today, my dad forced me to leave my empty shopping cart in the middle of a store, rather than return it to the corral. My dad’s word is law, and all I can think about is how much of an asshole I am. FML
Today, my son asked for candy at a supermarket checkout. I said no. He laid on the floor and began screaming as if I'd killed his pet rabbit. Other parents nodded at me in silent sympathy, while strangers judged me with their glares. I bought the candy. He still screamed. FML
Today, my vegan step-mom found out I ate at McDonald's yesterday. She gave me hell and asked me how it feels to give money to "murderers". All while my dad sat quietly by because he's too whipped to speak his mind. It wasn't even her house a month ago. FML
Today, I went to the supermarket to get some Easter gifts for my kids. At the register, I was verbally abused to the point of tears by the cashier, for having way too many items for the 12 items or less lane. I had 13. FML
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Top comments
WCARlover 35
Well if you're so concerned about it buy them yourself...not to sound harsh but your dad obviously isn't on board
unicornfairy 0
Chickens are not ugly! They are cute.
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Comments (282)
trollfaced 2
This fml cracked me up, no offense OP But if you really are that concerned, you should've probably bought it separately
ninjadinos 14
With cage free eggs you can consume animals with less cruelty. It is your opinion that animals are here for humans to consume, but not everyone thinks that way. For example, I do not believe that all animals are here just to fill our tummies. The world doesn't revolve around people.
jessie1 9
Sure, its ok to eat the animals, to sustain us and keep us healthy in order to survive. I don't recall it ever being ok to be unnecessarily cruel to them.
littlemsweirdo 12
Yo daddy is cheep cheep cheep!
VasilisaUzhasnaj 29
Somebody call Tommy Wiseau!
juturnaamo 29
If you care so much buy them yourself. You want your dad to foot the bill for your kindness to animals.
ninjadinos 14
Which is why cage free eggs are the way to go if you wish to be humane. No it isn't a bad thing, personally I am a vegetarian but I think it is fine for people to eat meat, as long as they are not doing it in a cruel fashion.
arcanevandal 0
Living in a cage your entire life is not painless. Though I do agree that fried chicken is delicious.
Trisha_aus 15
We were meant to eat them anyway..if you are so concerned then just buy them yourself
THE_A_TEEN 28
Avian species have been around longer than humans. I'm pretty sure we eat them for survival, not because "Oh it's here on earth, we must eat it".
downtime 13
How you know you're out of touch with the world: When you think the purpose of eggs is for human consumption rather than procreation.
squirrel1215 5
Okay, even if we're going along with your belief that we are "meant to eat them," "eating them" doesn't have to also involve stuffing them in cramped cages where they wallow in their own shit and are fed cheap, crappy food designed for the sole purpose of getting the best meat from them.
KendratheUnicorn 0
Chickens are cute :)
TheElderTROLLZ 15
And tasty.
AugustBurnsToast 14
Awwwe no your dad's mean chickens are adorable!
laevatin 2
Chicks are :D chicken is just chicken.