hospital
United States
Today, I started my first day at a new hospital. My first assignment? Shave an elderly man's testicles. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
dr mamour
Paris, France
Today, during my first day as a medical intern in a new ward, I was performing a rectal exam. My supervisor thought it would be funny to burst into the room and scream, "Who are you?! You don't even work here, you pervert!" FML
not as scarred as he should be
Cambridge, Canada
Today, I walked in on my mother using a razor to shave my dad's cream-covered testicles. FML
jonh_215
United States
Today, as a going away present after five years of military service and one combat tour, the hospital scheduled me for a prostate exam. FML
WTFFAIL
Montreal, Canada
Today, while getting a hernia exam, I accidentally ran my fingers through my doctor's hair. FML
Anonymous
Utrecht, Netherlands
Today, it was my first day working as a dental assistant, leaving me in charge of all cleaning. The first patient was so scared, he peed his pants. Which might have been understandable if he hadn't been a fully grown man. FML
Anonymous
This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff
Detroit, United States
The first day of the rest of your life (or not)
Today, it was my first day at my new job at a nursing home. Not only were we short staffed, two residents passed away, and I got beaten up by an old man. FML
Matthew
Wrong place, wrong time
Today, I awoke with a swollen, painful testicle. I called the ambulance and went to the hospital. After they'd done an ultrasound, it's a bad infection. My nurse was someone I used to know and had a major crush on. She's responsible for checking my testicle every 20 minutes when she checks my heart rate. FML
HairyBoobs
United States
So, here's the thing…
Today, I nearly sliced my nipple off while shaving my chest and had to go to the ER. Turns out it was a teaching hospital so I got to explain in front of two doctors and eight med students how, even though I'm a woman, my nipples are so hairy I have to shave them. FML
Buggga
Australia
Today, I was instructed to shave my back in preperation for my first tattoo. I'm a girl. FML
OhPleaseNo
OhPleaseNo
We could be heroes
Today, I was at work at my local hospital. I went to the toilet to empty my bladder; the door was half open so I assumed it was empty. Upon opening the door, I was greeted with a half naked old man, who then yelled at me and violently shat himself, all over the walls and floor. FML
Top comments
knibbsy 4
Man, you're new job is nuts! What a hairy situation. You did some hangin' around the office, only to get low-balled by your boss.
xxxbooxxx 16
Eww!!
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Comments (99)
xxxbooxxx 16
Eww!!
SMJ210 0
Fun! Did you use shaving cream? Would suck to have to deal with razor burn on what I can only imagine is such a sensitive area.
rushiee 0
oh gosh..... ******* sick :/
stephanie0613 0
That's ******* disgusting !
beelo44 0
My Name is Earl
EffinAhole 0
Thanks by the way! You were very gentle and my sak is nice and smooth now.
EffinAhole 0
ANTI-FLOOD PROTECTION CAN SUCK MY SMOOTH BALLS!
WallyTheWombat 0
You knew you would have to do crap like that when signed up for that job.
4evanucks 0
WHY THE HELL WUD AN 'ELDERLY MAN' NEED HIS ******* BALLS SHAVED?!?!?!
Michael216 0
I see what you did there.
confusdsincbirth 5
Wow Ayame.. Pretty lame.
Jessi2487 0
did his balls hang low? did they waggle to and fro? cant u tie them in a knot? can u tie them in a bow? can u throw them on ur shoulder like a continental soldier? did his balls hang low?
confusdsincbirth 5
Actually if you must know its a nickname from my friends. By the way, you look like a freak in your picture.
confusdsincbirth 5
And I am not attempting anything because I don't want to resort to moronic puns.
fritz2 0
amaye just get out. btw I agree you look like a freak.
stephanie0613 0
I agree with 132 and 133 Amaye shut the **** up and get the **** out.
xFalzz 0
Successful trolls were successful!
confusdsincbirth 5
Oh wow you are soo smooth I am sooo impressed! No.. You are annoying and they commented even though you werent speaking to them because you annoy them. They have a right to speak their mind.
JuliaM1000 10
How are you a docter, yet u have time to germt in the computer and screw around?
cporter125 0
wow, that must sucked... ...balls.
confusdsincbirth 5
Haha 63.
LexRB 0
aymen shut the **** up you stupid bitch. your damn annoying everyone
blueberry1223 0
I just had to point out that in your comment you say how much you hate when people show skin and make a moronic comment, yet this is exactly what you're doing here.
noobacabra 0
i just lost the game
BIGshooter 2
****
TheTigerRoars 0
He needs to look good for the women back at the nursing home. You know how it is. Just don't fondle someone who isn't interested OP. -The Fluffs
paid2think 0
Plenty of woman back in the nursing home. But he's goin after his young assistant :))
TheTigerRoars 0
Are you sure? I thought he'd go after Mrs. Grady, the widow who lost her husband in WW2. I was sure I saw the passion in their eyes towards one another. -The Fluffs
xxxbooxxx 16
it says it's in the work category..
AudaciouslyInsan 0
He was going after Ms. Grady last time I checked. -The Fluffs
paid2think 0
Maybe he is but I'm pretty sure he enjoyed that bubble bath his assistant gave him verryy much.
Tikwichka 5
Aw, #30, you gave the game away!
AudaciouslyInsan 0
No, I got banned. -.- FML gave the game away. -The Fluffs
paid2think 0
Damn you FML!
AudaciouslyInsan 0
So you mod that comment? Why it was the truth you know.
FFML_314 12
Are you going to learn?
AudaciouslyInsan 0
Learn what? To conform? No. -.-
FFML_314 12
LOL!
AudaciouslyInsan 0
I'm glad you're at least getting a laugh out of it. Well, tell MissGrinch she was my favorite person on here. I'm leaving like you guys wanted. I have enough stress and fml shouldn't add to it. Peace.
Freeze_fml 17
FML drama.
dreamering 16
Was he a **** star about to record a movie?
smallsmerry 0
no. but I am. lol jkjk
iluvharryp 0
visions of old people ****+shaving balls=TOTALLY DISGUSTING
azzaj 0
You love it.
knibbsy 4
Man, you're new job is nuts! What a hairy situation. You did some hangin' around the office, only to get low-balled by your boss.
GeneralCha 3
how long did it take u to think of that?
queencitystoner 0
first or not lol it was still great. well played sir
knibbsy 4
About 25 seconds from the first word to the last. I'm really that punny.
jsmith16 0
man ur comment is awesome!!
tbonea1990 0
ur a dumb ass making all the corniest jokes that's y u have no bf /gf
tbonea1990 0
ur a dumb ass making all the corniest jokes that's y u have no bf /gf
zoraman5 3
Heh, double post? Also, sort out your grammar please :3
Gumbinator 11
haha the man clearly made a funny...ur just jealous you didn't think of it....haha =p
itsgabriellee 4
113. Jeez. Way to lack a sense of humor.
TheOriginalKyrs 0
119-belzenef! :D I like how his comment didn't get chewed out, but the punny comment above did. I like this one better though. kudos to you :)
boticelli_fml 0
damn you're good !
kom84 0
how is this a FML? your at a new job working in a hospital so you must be a care worker or nurse.. your told in your training you have to do this sort of thing
fits138 0
^agree
RedPillSucks 33
Kinda like the guy who goes into gynecology because he wants to look at pussy, only to have his first patient be someones grandmother.
sydney_herbach 3
it might be something you have to do or something like that , but it still sucks to have to shave some olds guys sack ..
NurseHolly 3
It's certainly not a glamorous job! Trust me... There's worse things to come. Enjoy ;)
Freeze_fml 17
I'm sorry, but HOW does this relate to #2's comment? Are you learning how to comment?
Freeze_fml 17
Then you fail. If you really want to be at the top you should reply to #1. Duuurr.
paid2think 0
Oh didn't you hear? Mrs. Grady met someone outside the nursing home. I heard the old man did like her though. Poor him.