Today, I saw my boss, so I mentioned to him, "Oh, I quit." He then interrupted, saying, "Great, I was going to fire you this week anyway." I wanted to tell him I quit smoking. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, I gave my boss two weeks notice for me leaving work, as I had received a better job offer with twice the pay. I thought he took it well until I heard him mutter under his breath, "About fucking time." FML
Today, my boss called me and asked why I haven't been showing up to work. I didn't show up because he fired me last week over the phone. Then he fired me again for not showing up to work. FML
Stuck
Today, I was told by my boss if I was late one more time he fired me. I replied, "Can I quit then if that's the case." He then said no, and gave me more shifts. FML
Today, I was fired for job abandonment. Yesterday, my boss told me to go home early because we were so slow. After I reminded him, he laughed and said, "Oh yeah... You're still fired." FML
Today, my boss found out I had applied for a much better paying job. He told me I'd do a better job and make more money there. Then he fired me. FML
Today, my boss made sure to do one last thing before he retired. Fire me. FML
Today, I told my boss that I quit, and handed in my two week's notice. A couple of hours later, I found my letter of resignation had been photocopied and copies hung all around the office with "Best day ever" written on the bottom. FML
Today, my boss was fired by the board. A few days ago, he dropped several strong hints that he was going to promote me soon. FML
Today, my boss made up a rumor that I was quitting my job so I wouldn't get the promotion that was coming up. There goes that raise I've been wanting for six months. FML
Today, I tried to quit my job. My boss pulled me into his office and gave me a write-up for quitting, told me that he knows where I live, and that I'd better be at work tomorrow or he's going to come and drag me into work. FML
Top comments
jbuckets_404 39
So tell him that you were referring to smoking, not your job; that way you still get unemployment benefits (if applicable). (Also, find out why he's firing you so that you can correct that issue in your next job.)
BurnInDemonFire 39
"Looks like I picked the wrong day to quit smoking."
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (6)
BurnInDemonFire 39
"Looks like I picked the wrong day to quit smoking."
RichardPencil 32
That story also made me think of “Airplane.” Hey, youngsters, look up that movie — see what we old farts found hilarious.
BurnInDemonFire 39
I want to disagree with you on the "old farts" thing, but my bad back won't let me.
jbuckets_404 39
So tell him that you were referring to smoking, not your job; that way you still get unemployment benefits (if applicable). (Also, find out why he's firing you so that you can correct that issue in your next job.)
WeirdUS 30
Do you know if you’re going to open up a conversation with your boss with a I quit you can’t necessarily be surprise that they assume you’re quitting your job
ThatOneLonelyAsian 31
should've been wuicker with your wordd then
JasonThorn 23
Think before you speak.