Today, I received a response to my perfectly straightforward online dating profile: "How about changing a dirty diaper, mommy?" FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I posted an ad online for house cleaning services. So far, all fifteen responses have been solicitations for sex. FML
Today, an old flame reached out with some truly filthy intent. After burning with righteous indignation, I ended up sending back some embarrassingly submissive pictures. What is wrong with me? FML
Today, I accidentally sent a screenshot of my Tinder conversation to my mom, instead of my friend. Yes, it was dirty. FML
Today, I sent a scantily clad pic to my boyfriend, to which he responded "Nice, but please clean your room". FML
Today, I signed up for a dating site and used a photo of my mother and me at a wedding. Everyone stops responding when they find out they're talking to me and not her. FML
Today, I thought it would be hot if I sent my boyfriend kinky message. He didn't reply so I sent a few more. 10 minutes later I got a reply saying, "Honey, this is his mom and you should be a little less desperate." FML
Today, a friend showed me my husband's online dating profile, which includes photos of him with our kids. FML
Today, after going on a blind date with a man I'd met on Facebook, we went back to his apartment. All was going good, until he took off his pants, only to reveal that he was wearing a diaper. FML
Today, my boyfriend's response to me saying, "Most women like a bit of filth in the bedroom every now and again" was to start farting in bed. Not quite what I meant. FML
Today, I was sending my boyfriend dirty texts to try and turn him on so when I see him the next day he will want to get intimate. Twenty minutes later he texts back, "ew stop." FML
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Top comments
Mauskau 36
And that is when you pretend you didn't see the message and never reply...
iAlissa 34
That's a panty dropper for sure.
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Comments (55)
darkfireflame 15
Oh believe me, it gets worse. It gets worse.
ragini95 16
Everyday dating websites get weirder.
Desticles69 13
I've gotten a similar message before.....weirdos
mistressmommy94 4
damn haha that really sucks...uve had my share of awful things said as well lol
margie_cakes 6
I never understood the "sexy" connection with women calling their partner "daddy", either. Kinda weird, if you ask me.