Today, I received a packet of papers in the mail by the state suing me for child support. I am 22 and still a virgin. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I got a letter from the state that I'm being divorced. I've never been married. FML
Today, I got served paperwork stating that my ex-fiancée is suing me again for child support. About 7 years ago, I proved via DNA testing within the court system that I was not the father the first time. I see a talk show in my future. FML
Today, after moving back in with my parents, I found out they had held on to a chunk of mail still being sent during the time I had been changing my old address. Included was a summons to jury duty. FML
Today, I got served with a child support hearing. I've never met the woman suing and the person she’s going after has the same name as me. The court people told me not to worry, but those are famous last words and I know it. FML
Today, the cops showed up to my house and served me a child support order from the girl I had a one-night stand with, and who'd promised me she would abort the baby. All this was two years ago. My wife of three years was in the house and heard everything. She packed up her things and told me she’ll be calling her attorney. FML
Today, I was cleaning out my room and picked up my bed and found a condom. I'm 15 and still a virgin. FML
Today, I got a call from the county’s courthouse where I used to live saying I was being sued for fraud and expected in court to defend myself. Apparently, my ex took a loan out in my name and now I get to pay $2300 worth of legal fees and restitution to this loan company. FML
Today, a judge ruled against me. I filed for divorce because my wife got pregnant even though I had a vasectomy. Apparently, not informing your spouse of a vasectomy is worse than cheating in the eyes of the court. FML
Today, my divorce certificate arrived in the mail. Reading it felt like I was punched in the face by a brick. FML
Today, I got a letter stating that now that I'm in my mid-twenties, I need to start getting cervical exams. The only people interested in getting anywhere near my vagina are doctors. FML
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Top comments
Geoff_fml 0
still a virgin, wow, that is quite a feat these days, congrats, most people lose themselves in highschool, so tight
griffin3 0
Im still a virgin im 37 keep your head up
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Comments (62)
turdburgers 0
#s 52 & 53- Yes, because we didn't have to wait until our twenties to get laid automatically means we ****** random ***** and have low morals. Not everyone fails to meet someone with whom they can have a long-term, loving relationship (in which they have sex they don't regret in the least) in their teens.
Whiz_boy 0
Get a lawyer. Move as much money as you can to Switzerland. And if all else fails, get CrEaTiVe... May god or at least a good lawyer be with you.
nyknicks167 1
22 and a virgin ahahahahahahahahaha thats a fml by itself
flora8866 0
I agree with #52! I am 20 and still a virgin and I dont regret it!
Fml37 0
I think the real fml is that your 22 and still a virgin. Oh and btw just cause you lose your virginity doesn't mean you ****** a random girl off the street. Are you gonna never have sex cause your morals are too high? Come on, you only live once.
theclash06013 0
A) Ouch, I feel bad for you. B) You'll win in court. C) #59, and like half of these people being a virgin @ 22 isn't an FML, it just means he hasn't found someone yet, not banging random ****** isn't an FML
nyknicks167 1
#60 did u even read #59's comment bc they clearly said that "just cause you lose your virginity doesn't mean you ****** a random girl off the street."
Master_Frie 0
Why are a lot of you like "if you really still are a virgin"? If you're not going to beleive anything here why are you here???
dummykitty 0
Court papers, including notice of child support garnishment, and many others, are indeed sent through the mail. You don't need a proof of service for notices, only if you're being sued. I work at a Superior Court in the Family Law Division. I wish people would stop giving legal advise off of something they saw on TV.
awantoch 0
Abstinence.