Today, I realized that in my relationship with my significant other, the roles are switched. We went out for a nice dinner, I paid, and when we got home he "had a headache" and asked for an aspirin so he could go to sleep. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend was complaining about how we never see the movies he wants to see. So I took him to the movies, and he picked which one. Then he fell asleep. FML
Today, I took my girlfriend of a year out on a date, a nice fancy dinner and a movie. After dinner, I said that I was feeling sick and just wanted to go home. I didn't have the heart to tell her that dinner was so expensive that I didn't have money for the movie. FML
Today, I went to the movies with my crush, who had asked me out on a date. Assuming he'd pay, I left my money at home. When the time came to buy the tickets, he only bought one for himself. FML
Today, one my friends died. All my crying gave me a headache, so I asked my boyfriend to bring me some aspirin. My headache didn't go away. Instead, I got diarrhea because my boyfriend gave me laxatives instead of aspirin as a "joke" to cheer me up. FML
Today, I took my boyfriend out to dinner to an expensive restaurant. He overate, and now I have to nurse him through food poisoning. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were on a date and he starts complaining about how his back is hurting him. He complains the whole evening. Fast forward to later that night, we are in bed so I ask him if he was feeling OK. He says, "I guess so. I'm just confused about my feelings for you." FML
Today, I took my boyfriend to meet my parents over dinner. During the meal, he excused himself to the bathroom, and when he didn't come back after a few minutes, I went to check up on him. I ended up finding him in the living room, pocketing a pack of ambien from my mom's bag. FML
Today, my roommate was complaining about a headache, so I offered her some aspirin. She looked at me like I was stupid and said, "Uh… That stuff's only for heart attacks." I'm living with an idiot. FML
Today, while cuddling with my boyfriend, he got up and said he needed to go home because he was tired and just wanted to relax and watch TV. That's what we were doing. FML
Today, I had a first date. We really hit it off and wound up watching movies together and talking late into the night. I ignored a developing migraine all night, then tried to leave hurriedly when it got bad. He stalled me leaving by asking what's wrong. I started vomiting. FML
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Top comments
DocBastard 40
Welcome to the 21st century where people are people and there are no "roles".
powderbluetang 11
Damn, they've learned our tricks!
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Comments (201)
Arrangements 4
People are allowed to say you're ignorant because although we don't know you personally. You still stated your opinion on something, and sadly for you it was a bad statement. That reflects a part of your personality. You're pretty one-sided
bizarre_ftw 22
What kinky shit are you into that getting punched in the dick would give you a boner?
bizarre_ftw 22
There are 365 days per week?! O.O SHIT!!!!!! I think I failed preschool!!! I only know six!! Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, extension of Saturday night that starts after I go to sleep and ends when I wake up Monday morning.
bizarre_ftw 22
53 - we may not be the same but we are equal in right and worth, there is a difference
ilovefall10 21
I honestly do not see the problem here. He didn't do anything worthy of a FML. He had a headache so what? You think only females get headaches ? Before you hate me , let me just state that I am a girl myself.
kareltje 17
Ask him if he's got a head-ache in his dick head. If not, he should stop complaining. You're not stuffing anything in his "head".
joy118 5
Hopefully she's not "stuffing" anything anywhere... she's a girl lol
Jasonf6 0
Wow, way to live in the past. So, in your world the guy pays while the woman gets waited on hand and foot?
tyrrell030491 7
Thats not too bad. For the last 2 weeks I (male) have been doing the cooking and cleaning, while she sits playing xbox!
StromyG2 10
He's not that in to you.
bradserbert 0
Sounds like someone have a secret lover