Today, I let out the most horrific, loudest, and most vile smelling fart I have ever had in my life while in the middle of yoga class. Out of embarrassment, I tried to lessen the tension in the silent room by giggling, but no one saw the funny side. I was given looks of horror, and avoided by everyone else for the rest of the class. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, while in class, I had to sneeze. Not wanting to make a lot of noise, I held it in, only to instead let out a huge, long fart. Everyone, including the teacher, turned and stared at me intently. FML
Today, I went to the gym and accidentally farted during yoga class. Everyone looked at me and the instructor said, "Let's all take a moment to appreciate the power of core strength." FML
Today, at work, I needed to fart and thought it would be fast and silent, so I let it rip. I was wrong. Everyone turned around and looked at me as my fart rolled on for a good 10 seconds. The worst part, I screamed, "It wasn't me!" while I was still farting. FML
Today, while waiting for class, I let out a huge fart in front of everyone thinking no one would hear it over the music. I was wearing headphones. FML
Today, we were doing stretches in dance class where you are on your hands and doing the splits in the air while your partner helps hold you and stretch your legs further. Right as I lift my left leg up, I farted hugely right in my partner's face. I couldn't make eye contact for the rest of class. FML
Today, I accidentally farted while on my flight home. It was silent but so deadly that several people were visibly distressed. The overweight guy sitting next to me got a bunch of dirty glares. I was too ashamed to own up to it. FML
Today, I accidentally farted while shopping. There was an awkward silence followed by a god-awful stink and a lady's little girl bursting into tears. FML
Today, I farted A LOT during an exam, all silent, so I figured I should be OK. Then I looked around and everybody was suffocating and giving me sly looks. I'm now known to everyone in the department as SuperFart. FML
Today, my boss was telling everyone his mother recently passed away and he'll be off work for a while. I'd been holding in painful gas for a while, so I tried to ease it out. It turned into a long, squeaky fart in front of everyone. Everyone glared at me as if I was trying to be funny. FML
Today, I thought I was all alone in the class, so I lifted up my leg and ripped a huge fart. One of my students was still in there. He told everybody. FML
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Top comments
chelly_bee 0
that would be embarrassing but the other people need ti grow up. it is only a fart. everyone passes gas.
Joseph_Stalin 0
A few Russian scientists would like to speak to you. We are currently making improved gas bombs and we feel you can really help us!
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Comments (148)
Joseph_Stalin 0
A few Russian scientists would like to speak to you. We are currently making improved gas bombs and we feel you can really help us!
dane4422 0
LOL that's so funny NAT Lamo
CreepyGuy666 2
WTF this is hilarious :D
SAMHAlN 0
joseph this is Mussolini sup Mann long time no see eg?
Nowel 0
I thought girls didn't fart. just kidding but sucks to be you. I don't people are going to be close to you during yoga from now on.
missdezzybabee 0
fail for trying to cover that fart.
chuck_yams 0
I can taste it...on my tongue...onions...onions and...ketchup?
GrEaT_BaMbInO 0
step brothers. FTW. lol
BigPappaSimo 0
now the suits just seem kinda fuked up!
punjabi44 0
LOL I laughed soo hard when I saw the first sentence and if I was in your class I probably wouldve burst laughing my ass off so hard that I would shit my self, i'm just sayin
mclovin55 0
Way to rip one in yoga class!!(:
GrEaT_BaMbInO 0
next time go to a private room. YDI fir making people bask in your vile odor. .
Richisme 0
yoga IS supposed to relieve stress, right :)
Spastastic 6
There was a King of the Hill episode where Hank had to take a yoga class, (I forget why) and there was something called the "wind-releasing position". Immediately after he asked why it was called that, everyone started farting. This fml reminded me of that... Johnny Depp did the voice of the yoga teacher, who was really creepy and gross.
MissGrinch 4
-searches for this episode immediately-
dejwilley 0
it was because he hurt his back at work lifting two propane tanks at once. I love that episode!!!
TheIrishJaneDoe 9
That's exactly what I thought of! This is getting creepy. Wait, are you *actually* in my pocket?
Spastastic 6
-shifty eyes- maybe...
FerrariCake 2
Just for your information, chicks farting is not funny. It's a double standard, because guy farts are funny, but that's just the rules by which society operates. I don't make them, I just observe and learn. On the "socially unacceptable behavior scale", chicks that fart loudly rank just below mothers that drown their own small children. Now you know. So fix yourself.
Alkix 2
#30 Link to "socially unacceptable behavior scale" or it didn't happen.
AudaciouslyInsan 0
36! Stop being lazy, find your own link to the "socially unacceptable scale".
Sonfang 19
There is nothing wrong with a girl that farts, just the same as there's nothing wrong with a guy that bakes and cleans. Have a good weekend!
BakNBitz 0
Socially Unacceptable Behavior Scale: Best: Walking around topless Middle: Mother drowning baby Least Acceptable: Woman farting There is your scale
joemk2012 0
100% agreed
FerrariCake 2
It's settled then... that is the official scale.