Today, I left my parents house to drive 90 minutes back to college. As I was getting off the exit for my school, I realized I left my bright pink vibrator sitting on my dresser back at home. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I got home from my vacation. The last few days of my trip, I stayed at my father's house. I was having trouble sleeping last night so I decided to use a little "discreet" vibrator that I travel with. When I unpacked back home, I realized I'd forgotten the vibrator in my bed at my father's house. I'm mortified. FML
Today, I gave my mom an extra pillow since the ones in the guest room were too flat and hurt her neck. Hours later, I remembered that I'd stashed my vibrator in that pillowcase during a romantic camping trip with my husband. She found it. FML
Today, I got home from my 6-week vacation. Apparently, my mum cleaned my room for me while I was gone because my vibrator was neatly tucked into my blanket, next to my pillow instead of being hidden under my bed. FML
Today, I came home from work and found my sister using my vibrator in my own bed. FML
Today, I realized that the only place my missing vibrator can be is at the house of the people I just dogsat for. In their spare room. Which also serves as their kids' playroom. FML
Today, I got a new vibrator, raced all the way home, tore my pants off, took it out of the box, and then my grandmother walked in my front door. Apparently she's spending the night so she can make it to a doctor's appointment in the morning. FML
Today, I ran out of underwear and so I went into my mom's drawer to borrow a pair from her. It was then that I found out my mom uses the same vibrator as I do. FML
Today, at work, my vibrator rolled out of my bag so far down the table that I couldn’t catch it, and had to run round the table to grab it by leaning between two of my male coworkers. That vibrator lives under my bed, so the only way it could've got in my work bag would be my boyfriend pranking me. FML
Today, the vibrator I ordered online was delivered. I'd paid extra to make sure it would be here before the weekend, so I could sneak it into my room while everyone was gone. My dad decided to stay home all day and answer the door ahead of me. FML
Today, I needed money to go to the movie. I asked my mom if I could reach in her purse and grab a few bucks. When I opened up her purse her phone started to vibrate. I yelled over to my mom that her phone was ringing. She said the phone was next to her. I looked in the purse. It was a vibrator. FML
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Top comments
Houdrummer 0
If your dad catches it your F'd. But if your mom catches it she might just hide it for you. hide it in her Vajay-jay
liquidpaper 0
Could be worse. Unless your parents are the freaky religious masturbation-is-a-sin type, in which case FYL.
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Comments (72)
wrestler_fml 0
damn that sux... shouldnt have used a vibrator, huh? god getting ya
jim_witness 0
Yea, my mom packed up all my stuff one day and found my "sleeve" with the ****. Fortunately she found it with the younger MILF neighbor. You have to look for he good in any situation.
jl12345 0
are u all retarded? i dont think she was complaining about the 90 min like it was so far to drive in general...just pointing out how far she'd driven before she realized. and im sure many parents go into their kids rms when they arent there, not to snoop but to tidy up or something. obviously an embarrassing situation.
HIMnHER 0
so what at least you are having solo sex then with a partner.
gangstabby01 0
question: if you were driving, how or why did you notice you left it in the first place..? shouldnt you notice those things when your unpacking and not driving? its not like you needed it at that time..
allisonjean 0
it could've just been one of those random things you think of, it's happened to me before. a couple of times i've been about an hour and a half into a car trip, when i realize i forgot my straightener at home. happens to everyone. To the OP: 90 minutes really is not that far. You could drive that like, ten times a day, or more. I drive 90 minutes every few weeks, spend the day there, then drive home. big whoop. it's not that far. after driving three days to florida, 90 minutes speeds by.
Callyn 47
#23, I know I could make it if I really wanted to, but after 5 hours on the road I want to kill myself or someone else. I would never even try a round trip in one day or else I'd be worried that I might actually just run someone off the road when they did something stupid.
spiggle4 0
ooooooooooo man.. i know how that is. fyl
khaldun 0
Callyn, been there, done that. Well, the wanted to part. XD Fortunately by 2am the roads clear out for the most part and I get to play "dodge the truck drivers that are nodding off." =P
persekore 0
Ach, I feel your pain. I came back to school after summer vacation in another province and realised after a week that the only place I could have possibly left my vibrator was in the futon I use as a bed now ... there was no possible way it would go unnoticed, because when I'm at school it gets remade as a couch, but my mother never said anything. It just vanished off into the ether. ^^;
pppupu 0
every mom deserves a present when their kid comes to visit.