Today, I learned that most teenagers would rather grab free candy from the broken vending machine than help the guy stuck underneath it get free. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, at work, I had to help a teenager who was stuck in a toy car for kids, and no, it was not in one piece when she finally got out. FML
Today, I used the last of my money to buy a bag of vending machine chips for dinner. It got stuck. A passerby saw and generously offered to buy another bag of the same chips to dislodge it. Gratefully, I accepted his offer. It stayed stuck. FML
Today, while I was working at a supermarket, a kid started to cry in line because he couldn't get candy. Since we have free lollipops behind the desk, I gave him one. His mom complained to my manager and said I was grooming her child. FML
Trick it is, then
Today, after a stressful shift at work, I bought three bags of candy to hand out to trick-or-treaters tonight. I didn’t realize until I got home that one bag had a hole in it, and there were three empty M&M wrappers inside. My grocery store sucks. FML
Man vs. Machine
Today, I spent way too long battling a vending machine that ate my dollar but didn’t give me my snack. After shaking it, kicking it, and practically hugging it, I finally gave up. As I walked away in defeat, it dropped the snack. I rushed back to claim my prize… and the janitor grabbed it before I could. FML
HELP!
Today, I went to the vending machine, put in a dollar, and reached down to grab my snack. The slot door wouldn't open, so I pushed it harder. I got my hand in, but the door got stuck again, this time with my hand inside. I tried to push with my other hand. It got stuck too. FML
Little shit
Today, my son asked for candy at a supermarket checkout. I said no. He laid on the floor and began screaming as if I'd killed his pet rabbit. Other parents nodded at me in silent sympathy, while strangers judged me with their glares. I bought the candy. He still screamed. FML
Cheap and gross
Today, while at my job in a candy store, a boy stuck his hand into the bin, contaminating the candy. As I politely explained that the dad had to purchase the affected candy he refused, yelled, then angrily agreed to buy them. The total cost of the candy with the extra pieces? $1.69. FML
Candy Andy
Today, I was so hungry that I literally stole candy from a baby. FML
Today, a kid got his hand stuck inside my store's giant gumball machine. He started crying, and his negligent trainwreck of a mom bitched me out for being "unobservant." I'd been mopping up the mess she'd made after she'd spilled an open can of beer all over the floor. FML
Top comments
ThomasBombadil 31
Candy Crush!
Mynamewontfi 40
They've got their priorities straight.
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Comments (126)
Capitan 15
They see the positivity before negativity :)
iKJH 7
They were just making the machine lighter for you.
kayteakay 26
Assholes! I hope they get cavities.
CurlyQute 17
How did you get under it? Were you shaking the machine and it fell on top of you?
insomniac8400 13
If it makes you feel any better, I'd grab some free candy, but then id help you.
ahsanmasood 4
oh god! was it you??? i hope not...if it was...i hope you are feeling better!
miranda19234 6
Just one question…why were you under there and what was your intentions
SirTimtastic 6
That's really surprising since you're in Canada
tayymeds 23
I no longer wish to live on this planet
RedPillSucks 33
No longer? At what point did you realize that people do crazy shit? Since the beginning of civilization ?
False_Stupidity 42
I hear mars is accepting immigrants...
breakinlegs 19
How did the guy get stuck under it? Shouldn't have been shaking the vending machine!