Today, I used the last of my money to buy a bag of vending machine chips for dinner. It got stuck. A passerby saw and generously offered to buy another bag of the same chips to dislodge it. Gratefully, I accepted his offer. It stayed stuck. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, I went to get my car fixed. There was a vending machine in the waiting room, and I was hungry. The snacks were overpriced, but I still had a little money left over. I noticed a bag of Cheetos hanging loose, so I paid for them, hoping to get two bags. They both got stuck. FML
HELP!
Today, I went to the vending machine, put in a dollar, and reached down to grab my snack. The slot door wouldn't open, so I pushed it harder. I got my hand in, but the door got stuck again, this time with my hand inside. I tried to push with my other hand. It got stuck too. FML
Man vs. Machine
Today, I spent way too long battling a vending machine that ate my dollar but didn’t give me my snack. After shaking it, kicking it, and practically hugging it, I finally gave up. As I walked away in defeat, it dropped the snack. I rushed back to claim my prize… and the janitor grabbed it before I could. FML
Selecta blues
Today, I tried to get something out of a vending machine. It got stuck. I tried getting something else to knock it down. That got stuck too. I tried a third time… take a wild guess. One massive tirade later, someone came and tried to help me out. Stuck. Four times in a row. How is that even possible? FML
Hangry
Today, I stopped at a mini-mart and bought a family-size bag of potato chips, a tub of dip, a box of toaster pastries, and some snack cakes. The guy at the counter said, "Wow, someone's hungry!" I told him it wasn't all for me, paid, and left in a huff. It was all for me. I ate it all by that evening. FML
QUIET!
Today, I tried to quietly open a bag of chips during a movie. The bag made so much noise that people turned around to stare. When I finally got it open, I dropped the entire bag on the floor and chips scattered down the aisle. FML
Today, I had to pay my bus fare in very small change. After carefully counting out coins under the withering glares of a bus-load of people, I quickly slid them into the machine, and somehow ended up jamming it. FML
Damn
Today, after having the worst night of my life, my boss chewing me out and acid reflux all morning, I went to the snack machine at work to get the only thing that makes me happy, Reese's PB cups. I had just enough money to buy the very last one in the machine, and it got stuck. FML
Today, as a joke, my friend put my bus money in the vending machine. Not only did the machine not return my money, it wouldn't give me an item in return. FML
Today, I had to skip lunch to work on a big project, so I stopped by a vending machine. The number I wanted was 126, but I accidentally typed 124, using my last dollar. 124 was the only empty row. FML
Top comments
pjsr 33
Rock the machine back and forth until it falls on you and puts you out of your misery #mykingdomforabagofchips
PenguinPal3017 19
I had a night class in university from 7 to 10. We had a break halfway through. I hadn't eaten yet so I bought a bag of chips from the machine. It got stuck. So I bought another. Also stuck. I bought a third and they all fell down. I was a little embarrassed walking back into class with three bags of chips.
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Comments (20)
Miss_Whipped 43
Two suckers for the price of one!
pjsr 33
Rock the machine back and forth until it falls on you and puts you out of your misery #mykingdomforabagofchips
WHSKitty 7
Wtf?
WHSKitty 7
That # makes no sense to me... and it apparently isn’t anywhere else online, either...
julfunky 29
You actually searched “my kingdom for a bag of chips?” HAHAHAHAAHAHAA. Ahh. Now try “my kingdom for a horse.”
yeongji 31
It works. I was in the same situation back when I was a kid in school, except it was over a can of pop and not chips. I ended up rocking it so much that a few other cans of pop came loose. I ended up sharing the extra ones :)
pjsr 33
You do know people have been killed that way?
Donut_Wizard 23
I’d recommend calling the A Team, but they charge a lot for an appearance.
WHSKitty 7
Roflmao
Dave_Davington 34
Should've gone to the supermarket. Best prices you'll ever get short of buying wholesale, and there's no risk that they'll get stuck somewhere inconvenient after you've paid.
Earl_KarmasBitch 36
No risk? We obviously who in very different places.
Dave_Davington 34
Don't you be assuming where I who, good sir.
Earl_KarmasBitch 36
I have no idea what autocorrect was thinking there.
Nick Bornhoft 4
well at least he tried lmao
RichardPencil 32
He obviously passed on the golden opportunity to take you out to dinner. There’s your FML there! Maybe he has a strict “no poor chicks” policy.
Davros 12
Sounds like one of the games at the county fair.
Glowworm56 27
That happened to me once in college. The apple juice got stuck in the vending machine, and I'm not strong enough to shake it down, so I bought a strategically placed second one to knock down the first. It also got stuck. The third one managed to knock the others down--so I got three apple juices instead.
Cody Vertigo Bonthoux 15
me "shatters vending machine glass"
PenguinPal3017 19
I had a night class in university from 7 to 10. We had a break halfway through. I hadn't eaten yet so I bought a bag of chips from the machine. It got stuck. So I bought another. Also stuck. I bought a third and they all fell down. I was a little embarrassed walking back into class with three bags of chips.