Today, I got the chance to speak to some of the top academics in my field. I was so hungover that I couldn't remember the title of the Masters degree I've spent two years studying for, let alone make intelligent comments. I'm pretty sure the only thing I got right was my name. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I presented the worst seminar presentation probably in the entire history of my graduate department. I kept stumbling over questions, and overall, making an ass out of myself. I probably should leave my masters program at how thoroughly I burned myself. FML
Today, I had my first job interview in months. The guy chuckled mockingly at my master's degree in philosophy and wound up admitting that he had no idea why I'd even been selected to be interviewed. FML
Today, while not feeling well at work, I had to finish up some papers. I was so out of it, I couldn't remember how to spell my name. I had to improvise by pronouncing each syllable of my name out loud. My boss now thinks I'm a dumbass. FML
Today, I tried to impress my boss with my knowledge of a subject and ended up sounding like a complete idiot. FML
Today, I worked up the courage to ask a question in a packed lecture hall. The professor repeated my question, except he'd misheard me and rephrased it into something wildly incorrect. The class laughed. Instead of correcting him, I nodded. Now half the class thinks I don’t understand the difference between correlation and causation. FML
Today, the only part of my Psychology final that I was 100% confident in was my name. FML
Today, I taught my first seminar as a teaching assistant. I prepared for hours and rehearsed and discussed it with the professor. Two students fell asleep, I said "shit" twice and I froze mid-sentence, then said, "Sorry guys, I have no idea what I'm saying." FML
Today, after I took my first set of exams, my professor posted on Twitter, scoffing at how stupid one student's answer was. The answer he quoted was one that I wrote. FML
Today, after finishing a two hour essay exam that will determine the future of my career, I realized I misread the question. FML
Today, I was sitting in my cubicle at work, nursing a hangover, and thinking how stupid I was for getting so shit-faced last night. I then realized that I was voicing my thoughts out loud, and the whole office had gone quiet, listening to me castigate myself. FML
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Top comments
jemmers 13
Wow you really deserve it this time, my friend. Next time, lay off the alcohol the night before a meeting like this. You really messed it up and I have no sympathy for you.
DocBastard 40
You only get one chance to make a first impression, and you blew it. I'm sure you made quite the impression. If you're going to act like an idiot in front of people, at least do it drunk, not hungover.
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Comments (74)
shelbzlynn 14
YDI for getting wasted and hungover before an important thing like this. Guess common sense isn't that common.
KayleeT 9
Come on, you HAD to know that wouldn't have turned out well. It's such a clearly bad decision I don't even know what state of mind you had to be in to make it.
Zazoo1995 23
Drunk, obviously.
sexysax93 3
I'm not going to lie, but I spent a good 30 seconds trying to read this fml with a Canadian accent.
EpicSquishii 21
I'm not going to lie, but I spent a good 10 seconds wondering why you thought anyone would care whether or not you were going to lie.
RoseBlack123 37
Um why is this under intimacy?
mbuck87 19
Maybe OP finds academics sexy
Shortay123 14
#16, If you look closely it's actually under miscellaneous. Hence the ?
superxmario91 11
Don't drink and lecture next time
chuka81 27
And that is how alcohol delayed me from getting my Masters Degree. Moral Lesson: Don't drink more than you can handle before a big meeting.
SystemofaBlink41 27
Considering how you couldn't pull through being 'hungover' instead of drunk, there might be a slight chance you got your name wrong too...
FML_14u2c 14
A girl I knew got so drunk once that she told people at a party that her name was "furner." (It was actually Jennifer...) With Jennifer in mind, I can only imagine what name OP gave those important people.
CanadianCutie22 16
rough night ?!
Adhdkid107 9
I usually don't say this but you really do deserve this OP. Think about it next time.
AlexiAwesome 10
One for one, OP! good job...