Today, I got put in a speech impediment class because apparently I have a lisp. No, my tongue is just swollen, and I can't talk very well because of it. I've talked normally for the past 17 years. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I have a speech impediment that's recently become more noticeable. My entire family has decided that the best way to go about handling it is to mock me whenever I try to say something. FML
Today, I gave a presentation in class. I felt pretty good about it, until afterwards when I was told I lost points for communication because I'd been chewing gum. I wasn't, I just have a speech impediment. FML
Today, I got slapped by a date because she thought I was making fun of her speech impediment. I wasn't making fun, I just have the same speech impediment. FML
Today, I gave a presentation. My teacher deducted points because I "need to learn how to speak more confidently, because you often stumble over your words." I have a stutter. FML
Today, I found out that I have Dysarthria, a condition where you can't pronounce certain words. I can't even pronounce the condition. FML
Today, I overheard my boss and a co-worker talking about me. Apparently when I speak, I slur my words so badly that it sounds like I'm speaking in tongues. According to my boss, "he could be possessed by a demon right now, and we'd never even notice." FML
Today, I was giving a presentation to my college class. I've had a natural stutter my whole life, so I stuttered through the whole thing. My professor tried to hold in her laughter for 15 minutes. FML
Today, I started my treatment for dental aligners. I talked to myself a bit to see how I sounded and it turns out that I have a small lisp. I wanted to share how I sounded with someone, then I realized I don't have anyone I can call. I have to wait 3 days until someone can hear my funny new lisp at work. FML
Today, a customer punched me in the face for repeating their order back to them because they thought I was making fun of their speech impediment. I have the same speech impediment. FML
Today, during a series of violent sneezes due to a cold, I bit my tongue. My tongue is now so swollen I cannot close my mouth and am drooling profusely. I have to get ready to go to my job as a cashier. FML
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Top comments
UserDoesNotExist 12
How did your tongue get swollen? At least tell us.
399 41
Cat got your tongue :Þ
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Comments (26)
dannidoll93 24
How does that even happen without someone discussing this decision with you? Even if you DID have a lisp, you might not want to do a class on it. I can't stand when people meddle in stuff that has nothing to do with them. Hope your tongue feels better soon anyway, OP.
Aethereal 14
Especially since it's implied they're at least 17...
dharmaint 15
Does anyone know this
hellnosucka 27
who else read this with a lisp?
Jetix7402 22
I'm not gonna lie, I did...
Siriusproblem 10
Really? ****, I've had a speech problem and they took me out of it when I entered high school because it was a "lost cause"
jensenisbatman 12
Well then don't go to the class
MuffinMn 9
lithp*
Aethereal 14
How come a 17+ year old can be moved to speech impediment class against their will? And they wouldn't even take a simple explanation of a presumably visible temporary condition? Is there a higher authority you can turn to?
Ambitiousmould 8
You have speech impediment classes? Where I come from, if you're lucky the only thing that happens if you have a lisp is that people rip the piss out of you.
wordygirl 11
I can't believe you let it get that far. You should have wrote down that it's not a permanent thing and gave it to your teacher. Lord, stand up for yourself! It doesn't seem anyone else did.
jumr0583 9
I was kicked out a higher reading class due to the fact that I have a stutter and could not make it far enough through the portion of the test where I had to read out loud.