Today, I gave my boss a nickname. Everyone thought it was funny. Unfortunately, "The Troll" was behind me and heard everything. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my boss threatened to write me up, after I made a slightly rude joke about a coworker everyone hates. A while later, a colleague told me the same joke. Turns out my boss had gone around telling it to everyone else and taking all the credit. FML
Today, I found out my boss likes to shit talk about me when I'm not around. The best part is that I don't know what I've done to piss him off. FML
Today, I overheard a conversation between coworkers, during which my name was mentioned, then, "and then I followed her around for a bit, but she didn’t do it again." Everyone laughed. I've no idea what I did that was so funny. FML
Today, my boss finally pronounced my name correctly. My name was then followed by the words, "You're fired." FML
Today, for some reason, I called my boss "Mum" in a meeting. To make it worse, I panicked and followed it up with, “Can I have a raise?” Everyone laughed except my boss. FML
Today, my boss suspended me for laughing too hard at my desk and causing a big scene in front of our customers. I was laughing because he'd forwarded me a hilarious email. He was practically smirking as he handed me my official warning. FML
Today, my boss shouted and screamed at me for my fuck ups that have humiliated the company and cost thousands to put right. It was only when he paused that I was able to tell him he had the wrong guy, he wanted my coworker down the hall. I’ve been here for four years and he still doesn’t know my name. FML
Today, I accidentally called my boss "Mom." Now she is jokingly telling everyone that I'm the long-lost daughter she gave up for adoption, because she knew I'd be a failure. FML
Today, my boss mistakenly drunk-texted me and was talking shit about me. FML
Today, my boss wrote me up for saying "pissed" in front of a client. This is the same boss who nearly pissed himself laughing when a client made an extremely off-color Holocaust joke a few weeks ago, in front of half the department. FML
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Top comments
saIty 17
I bet he had his troll face on ready to fire you.
DanGleesak 11
Your boss was trolling you.
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Comments (138)
docscientist 10
Who would've thought your boss could've possibly been around at work?!
docscientist 10
Who would've thought your boss could've possibly been around at work?!
badactor009 0
Crazy talk, right?
Ray_of_midnight 23
U FIRED?
badactor009 0
Don't worry about being fired. The boss can keep you around and just waste a decade of your life if you are dumb enough to stay. The plum assignments will go to anyone but you. The boss will position others to skate right by you. You just sank any hope of career development and advancement you might have had at that place. Way to go. You are a Dilbert cartoon come to life.
volleyball332 0
Very original
30STMlove 0
kill it with fire!!
bepatientimadoc 6
Can you imagine how painfull this must have been for OP's boss? I mean to hear ppl talk abt u like that behind u back is terrible. The bosses job is never easy. at least have the guts to say it to u bosses face! YDI
meirasanya 10
I'm guessing they were laughing because he was behind you, not because of the stupid, unoriginal nickname you "created"
Daralea 21
Fired AND fried!
rexreta 5
Probably because he was standing right behind you XP