Today, I found out that the loving nickname my Chinese mother has been calling me my entire life essentially translates to "little retard". FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I realized what my mom has been calling me for 20 years. She always calls me her "little fehler." With her being from Germany, I always thought it was a cute little nickname. Apparently, she's been calling me her "little mistake." FML
Today, I found out that the nickname my friend has been calling me in Japanese for the past year is the word for "Idiot". FML
Today, I discovered that my name literally means "burden". This wouldn't be so bad if both my mother and father knew this when they named me. FML
Today, I figured out my girlfriend's mother has various nicknames for me. My girlfriend and her family are from Poland and speak on the phone in their native tongue, but they don’t know I’ve been learning the language either. I heard her call me “idiot”, “loser”, “moron” and various other “nicknames” multiple times. FML
Today, I learned that the cute pet name my boyfriend has been calling me for the past month is actually an acronym for "pain in the a**". FML
Today, I finally found out that the tattoo on my lower back means "slut" in Chinese, instead of "good fortune" as I always thought it did. FML
Today, I accidentally called my boss "Mom." Now she is jokingly telling everyone that I'm the long-lost daughter she gave up for adoption, because she knew I'd be a failure. FML
Today, my mother who learned English as an adult sent an email to my boss, thanking them for hiring me even though I'm "retarded." I’m a law school graduate who was diagnosed with a minor learning disability in kindergarten, but she still calls me "retarded" when speaking English. FML
Today, my dad opened a Chinese fortune cookie that read, "Experience is the name everyone gives to their mistakes." Now he won't stop calling me Experience. FML
Today, I discovered that my cool, unique first name translates to "unwanted" in Hindi. Both my parents studied abroad in India for five years. FML
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Top comments
thomcmoore 23
Mother knows best?
DocBastard 40
Better than "Big Retard", I suppose.
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Comments (124)
meilzz 23
If my limited Mandarin Chinese is correct, then I do believe that OP was most affectionately called "xiao di neng," pronounced kshi-ao dee nahng in English.
lina21 12
Asian parents can be harsh dude. Laugh about it and move on? Unless she's done other things to indicate she's abusive or whatever, it's just one of those things
lisslyi 19
“我亲爱的宝贝小白痴！”
Futacy 30
Squiggly line, squiggly line, bookshelf, cross, box with squiggly line, toothpicks with squiggly line, bigger bookshelf, cat face.
lisslyi 19
Ah my bad. :( didn't realize it looks like that on other people's screens.
Binda33 4
Use the information to put the guilt on her at every opportunity. Good times especially would be right before your birthday or any gift giving holidays! Play it right and you can use this for the rest of your life! :D
cheesebond 29
My grandmother always called me ugly in Spanish as a "compliment"
ridl_14 3
In Germany, a common pet name for babies/small children is 'Little shit'...
missyfiona89 28
xiao bai chi?
Alina_Eduardovna 9
I just learned my Russian mother has been calling me an ass my whole life. :/
StateFarm98 10
(Weirdly) She probably means it in a loving way. My friend's dad calls him ******** all the time but he knows it's a joke, it may be similar with what your mom is calling you
davincidasecond 24
So what, she's the female Chinese version of Red Forman or something?