Today, I found out that my mom doesn't know my phone number, but she does know the names of both of David Hasselhoff's daughters. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I found out my stalker is my mom's new boyfriend. FML
Today, I found out that my contact name in my girlfriend's phone is "Dipshit McFucktard". FML
Today, I found out I was named after the woman my dad used to stalk when he was in high school. FML
Today, my mom called me by her favorite TV show character's name. Again. This is the eighth time this week. I'm an only child, and I'm 15. I thought she had my name down pat by now. FML
Today, I was going through my daughter's contacts, except all of them had names from Harry Potter. I found the name "Mom." I was relieved I didn't have some silly name, until I realized it wasn't my number; it was her father's new wife. My number was under "Voldemort." FML
Today, I found out that my mum has been texting my ex-boyfriend to tell him what a dick he is. FML
Today, I found out that my mom uses my Facebook account more than I do. FML
Today, I found out my mom pretended to be me and had AIM conversations with my boyfriend. FML
Today, my phone rang for the first time in four days. It was my mom. She dialed the wrong number. FML
Today, it was my daughter's birthday. I didn't know I had a daughter. FML
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Top comments
OneLittleAdditio 9
So? My mom doesn't know my number either she just finds me on her contacts and clicks send. the magic of cell phones!
DjeePee 25
Here's a thought: maybe your mom is good in remembering names, and bad in remembering phone numbers. I am.
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Comments (76)
jessiebelle90 0
you're an idiot
Lolerskatez 0
Atleast she knows the important things =]
Alleged_Cranium 7
Yep. Mom has her priorities straight.
andrewshields20 0
I wouldn't remember you number either if I was in a nursing home. dick.
DishHeads 9
WTH do you expect ??? names are easy, numbers don't mean anything, hard to memorise
sk3l370n 0
having a sex change might help?
CookieEaterO_O 7
looser :)
TexanDanny 2
he means get looser, like a girl
OneLittleAdditio 9
So? My mom doesn't know my number either she just finds me on her contacts and clicks send. the magic of cell phones!
Sadochan 0
Who the **** calls them 'cell phones'? ******* loser.
ImaginaryFoe 1
That's what I figured, too. My mum is terrible with numbers. I have no idea what useless bits of trivia she knows instead because I don't get butthurt over dumb shit.
Sadochan 0
I don't even know what the **** you're on about. If it's about my comment, the ***** your mum have to do with this?
marmlr339 14
this isn't even an FML. now in response to the guy above me... Americans call them cell phones. just because in Australia. that word is not used it doesn't mean it isn't used. and chill out!
TexanDanny 2
sado shut the **** up, you must be one of those lonely people that get on the internet and talk shit to feel good about themselves
elme0212 0
sado, #12 wasn't even talking to you, loser. how about you get a life?
sugarr0babby0 0
4 - I love your picture ! :)
doggone456 0
You sir, should learn a new word besides "****", you shouldn't ******* use it in ever ******* sentence, you ******* troll. :) anyways f the op's life
ImaginaryFoe 1
I repeat: I don't get butthurt over dumb shit. Don't feed the troll, kids.
W4X 0
^ Agreed.
Zebidee 9
Sadochan - please tell me you're a troll, because I'd hate to think that you were that ******* stupid.
Judus_beej 0
that's important information. if your moms on a trivia show she might need to know that for the final answer. your number is just your number. I forget mine all the time.
mandomandomando 3
I guess she loves them more! :p
TerrorDollie 0
She seems to have her priorities straight!
waswashere 0
nice
Brian Green 8
YEAH! Cuz remembering phone numbers that are literally a click away is so important now adays! SHAME ON HER!
TerrorDollie 0
She seems to have her priorities straight!
DjeePee 25
Here's a thought: maybe your mom is good in remembering names, and bad in remembering phone numbers. I am.
Mister_Grinch 0
Names - First and last or two words to remember. Number - Long ass digits that go on forever in some cases. I say it's a win for mom.