Today, I found out I have sodium fluoride poisoning. Apparently, my water has a high level of sodium fluorine. I've been drinking much more water lately trying to be healthier. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I heard on television that a body was found in my city's water reservoir. Word is that it was dead for over a week. I've been drinking and showering with that water. FML
Today, I realized I need to cut back on drinking. Not booze, but water. I compulsively drink so much water that my body is bloated from water absorption and I have to pee constantly. FML
Today, I found myself sitting in the bathroom at work searching the internet for the alcohol and caloric content of cool mint Listerine. I now believe that I may have a problem. FML
Today, I woke up, took a shower, made some pasta, drank 3 glasses of water and brushed my teeth. I then left my apartment to see signs posted all over warning us not to use the water without boiling it because the water company just found E-coli in the water. FML
Today, I'm starting to have a chlorine sensitivity. I'm a swimming teacher. FML
Today, I noticed a thick layer of mold growing inside the straw of my water bottle. I use that bottle every day. FML
Today, I choked on water so hard that I threw up and shat myself. FML
Today, I found out the reason I've been itchy for the last two weeks is because I'm now allergic to chlorine. I'm also a swimming instructor. FML
Today, my parents took my to hospital with headache, cramps, sweats and tremors. The doctor thought I was an drug addict in withdrawal, which, after some questions, turns out I am. I gave up fizzy soda last week and am in total withdrawal from caffeine and all the other addictive chemicals in soda. FML
Today, my brother started ranting about how fluoridated water is a conspiracy to "turn people gay". I said the government must be doing a shit job of it, since he's been drinking the stuff longer than I've been alive and is still married to a woman. He punched me so hard, my vision blacked out. FML
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Top comments
lovelyvampire 16
I didn't even know that was actually possible.... just try and drink bottled water instead of from the tap. it'll hopefully prevent that.
901_khad 10
If FML has taught us anything, it is that when you try bad things happen.
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Comments (64)
Llama_Face89 34
Well. Guess the only **** you that would be more obvious is a big middle finger in the clouds..
ayomaggots 8
I got sick from drinking my tap too. I started boiling the water to kill the germs and refrigerating it. it works like that
The_Unlucky1 19
Irony.
theonecasey 27
Speak your mind, but please try and be respectful.