Today, I flew to England to visit my boyfriend, who has been working there for the past three months. I went to his hotel and waited for him; he never showed up. I called one of his colleagues to ask him what was going on. He had no idea what I was talking about. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, I went to pick up my long-distance boyfriend at the airport. It has been over six months since I last saw him and four days since I last heard from him. He never showed up. FML
Today, I got a call from my boyfriend's boss. She was wondering if he was okay, since he hasn't shown up to work for the past two weeks. Now I'm wondering where he's been going when he leaves the house each day. FML
Today, the guy I have been seeing left town to visit his family for three weeks. A few hours later, he called me from the airport to say he is never coming back. FML
Bad look
Today, after patiently waiting to see my boyfriend for a month because he was overseas, I excitedly went to the airport to finally pick him up, only for him to walk straight past me to greet his friends. He didn't even bring back anything for me, but brought back a suitcase full of goodies for his friends. FML
Welcome home!
Today, I went to the airport to pick up my long-distance boyfriend. Having waited six months for this, I was stoked. After waiting for three hours and sending numerous messages, I was eventually informed I was a week early. FML
Suavely done
Today, my boyfriend left for a 2-year job posting in China. We had agreed to maintain a long-distance relationship, and even worked out a visiting schedule. Later that night, after trying to reach him, I realized the numbers he gave me weren't for China. The country code doesn't even exist. FML
Today, I showed up to work and my boss was nowhere to be found. A phone call later, I find out he's in Dubai. Oh, and since I'm his personal assistant, I should be able to take care of matters until he gets back. I've only been his assistant for a week. FML
Empty seat
Today, I booked a flight to see my girlfriend. At least I thought she was coming, the flight isn't cancellable because I was broke and could only afford the minimum ticket. I just wanted to make her happy. Well, it's now four days before the flight and I haven't heard from her for a week. I've been left on 'delivered', thinking at 4 am. FML
Today, my boyfriend, who lives 100 miles away and whom I haven't seen in 2 months, told me he was visiting my city with some friends. I assumed this was an opening to an invitation, but no, he just asked me about the best places to get drunk. FML
Today, I woke up early, showered, dressed, and made the 40 minute drive to work, only to discover when I arrived that today was my day off. When I got home my live in boyfriend was gone. I called and he told me he was at the beach, right near my work. FML
Top comments
Brelywi 15
Aww that sucks. On the plus side, cute boys with English accents are all around you!!
DocBastard 40
Wh...wh...what? You mean a CT scan of a crushed skull doesn't turn you on? Pictures of steak knives soaked in blood don't get you riled up? What the hell is the MATTER with you, son? You need serious psychiatric help.
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Comments (85)
klxs 2
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
So does anyone else notice that sometimes when you get really bored and start touching yourself to DocBastard's latest avatar that you just feel really really dirty and weird and stuff? I dunno, I mean I kind of have a fetish for small woodland animals, myself, so it shouldn't faze me, but for some reason wanking to x-rays of a blood-soaked knife buried in some guy's back just makes me feel like a bit of a weirdo. Is this normal? I don't FEEL like a freak, nam'sayin? :/
_Oblivion_ 12
No you're first dumbshit.
_Oblivion_ 12
LOL I love the mods
PaulB123 11
No. Neither are you.
Danny0522 8
No, I don't know what you're saying
DocBastard 40
Wh...wh...what? You mean a CT scan of a crushed skull doesn't turn you on? Pictures of steak knives soaked in blood don't get you riled up? What the hell is the MATTER with you, son? You need serious psychiatric help.
KeyboardWarrior 10
I'm gonna comment first one day just to see what the mods will whip up. Nice fetish you have there #1.
j_cat187 20
I think doc just got trolled.
Danny0522 8
That's not the first time I've heard that, but if it's your professional opinion....
DevLights 1
I wish I could have seen the original comment.
iknowimawesome 13
This just made my day.
Jakesterk96 8
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
How did this long ass comment get #1?
_Oblivion_ 12
35- I caught a glimpse and it said "last", trying to act like a smartass
littletinyME 5
39- Do you not understand how comments work?
Jakesterk96 8
My fault, I assumed he was using his phone like me to comment (takes forever). But if your comment gets moderated, do u get a chance to edit it?
Shrike 24
ಠ_ಠ You're new here, aren't ya kid?
_Oblivion_ 12
Mods are funny people. They will humilate you and they will remove your comment. However this particular one is a great example of a mod's sense of humor. A mod edited the 1st comment because it was so ridiculously stupid it was literally screaming "MESS WITH ME" so the mod edited it to her liking. You are enlightened.
CeruleanThree 8
What the hell did I just read?
bettyc4 26
Get help
DQEight 8
Dafuq did I just read?
THE_A_TEEN 28
Ever since I created this account, I have waited fir a comment like this. I waited and waited, but it never happened, until today! Now I can die in peace knowing that this was one of the most hilarious Mod Intervention's i've ever seen. That or that guy is seriously ****** up inside the head. I suggest A PUBLIC BEATING IN THE MIDDLE OF FML TOWN SQUARE!!!
Cryptic_Equinox 0
LMFAO. Thank you mods, you just made my day.
nabila21 0
The ****?
GoW_Chick 15
I think it's wonderful the mods can do their jobs so well and give us all a good laugh on someone else's expense, this is what FML is all about people! *sniffle*
Jonkbaby 23
your boyfriend is in another castle
SecretMe00 5
Why are people thumbs downing a mod? I don't see a point in it.
Sirin_fml 47
I will wildly speculate it is because he is not in fact a moderator.
SecretMe00 5
And how do you know if it's a mod or not?
Sirin_fml 47
The whole "FML Staff" thing, unless I've been dreaming all these years. :-(
THE_A_TEEN 28
Secretme00, are you ******* serious? Look at Sirin: her name ends with (fml staff), her comment is a yellowish/gold color, she has a medal in the top right hand corner. That is the signs a mod. Commenter #1 doesn't have these signs. MORON!!!
McMan 23
I wonder... *Goes to make an account with (FML Staff) behind it*
BABYPUNCHINGGUY 0
I totally know how you feel brosef
McMan 23
I wonder... *Goes to make a account to with (FML Staff) then has comment removed. When Sirin is asked she says it's because he's Canadian but knows that he has uncovered a major flaw in this FML conspiracy and that anyone reading this should further the cause.* VIVA LA REVOLUTION!
McMan 23
Gentlemen, it has been an honour playing with you tonight. *Plays the violin while the ship goes down.*
firecopy 6
Why no calling card? Wee.... You know the rest :/
DQEight 8
125 Don't forget to accidentally slip onto a lifeboat!
brown4lifejot 1
This sort of ruined my day knowing i missed out on all this.
marisadc79 0
You need help badly
LIZistheSHIZZ 10
Wtf?
parkerwashere 6
You must have gotten up on the wrong side of the padded room this morning.
Princesswarrior 0
Wtf Is Wrong With You Mental Much ? You Need God To Fix You And Animals Seriously ? What Are You A F-Ing Animal **** Person ? Your Human Think Of Being Gay Or Straight Or Bi Idk **** This Is The Weirdest Comment I Ever Read You Got Problems O.o
Brelywi 15
Aww that sucks. On the plus side, cute boys with English accents are all around you!!
crazychick1269 7
British and australian accents are so damn Hott
_Oblivion_ 12
I think 1 just earned the "fastest comment removal ever" award.
cash_monkey72 9
They tend to have shitty teeth though...
mfjkr 10
Yes...yes they are..
maphineRAWRS 10
I'm Australian and I didn't even realize we had accents.. Haha
tellithowitis 13
No, no they aren't. I prefer flivver flabber
Brelywi 15
I wish I could teach my husband to have an Australian accent... Or Scottish *drool*
micahsmommy 13
I'll give you the accent thing. I'm a Brit living in the states and people comment on my accent all the time. However as to hot English men those seem to be few and far between.
GoW_Chick 15
If I may add in my input about hot accents, I love Irish, and Finnish accents.
Brelywi 15
I've never heard a Finnish accent, but Irish is definitely hot.
Eiregal2 10
I used to think I didn't have a very thick Irish accent until I went to America. I spent five days in new York having very excited people remind me of my origin "omg your Irish!!" one even hugged me, bless you Americans, so easy to make happy lol
downtime 13
I think when people hear the Australian accent its more a feeling of "naww, they think they're people". Our accent sounds like someone with a bit of brain damage or intellectual disability. But whatever floats your boat...
mama2b3 20
Way to find the silver lining! So true!
KiddNYC1O 22
God I'm hard...
simone92 3
Aussie accents deffs aren't as hot as Irish!
taco_bender 12
But Australian chicks are hotter than Irish girls.
girl112891 7
I forget I have an accent all the time but there are words my boyfriend and his friends have teased me about and I don't say them anymore. But Americans have lazy tongues!
1happymummy 14
Good luck finding a 'cute english boy' they are a rare occurance over here!
kareltje 17
Finnish accents are horrendous...
NattyB123 8
Haha I'm Australian and didn't think our accents were attractive, but whatever tickles your pickle... :)
blushy 14
i think you should have a blast and lots of hook ups to get back at that ass
cradle6 13
Doesn't sound like he exists. Or maybe, you and him have been the same person the whole time! 0_0
tellithowitis 13
JUST FREAKING PARTY! YOURE IN ENGLAND!!!!!!!!
airforce987 20
Just like the club that you can't talk about according to the first two rules!
Eiregal2 10
The pubs close at like ten in England and they have the smoking ban, woo, party hardy!
vikskellington 0
24 hour drinking in a majority of pubs now
SecretMe00 5
Like a schizophrenic?
UsernameInCanada 7
Genius man! Like Aaron Stampler (Edward Norton, same guy as in the club whose first two rules shall not be said) from Primal Fear
DalekScythe 0
Say hi to The Doctor for me! :)
CinderellaC 4
That's a committed lie he's living
biggestfan23 11
The question I have is why wouldn't she make arrangements with him before she went there
Nutty4Muffs 3
She did, and he lied to her about England and everything, probably met over the internet. Valuable lesson for OP and Trolling at its best (worst?).
thebeautybleeds 17
Well if he 'went to work in England for 3 months' we can assume he's not from England, and as such probably someone she was dating offline.
snrdncr08 2
Well, you can clearly see that the OP is from New England, so it may be safe to assume that her boyfriend is from there as well. That would explain why he was working in England (anyone ever heard of a traveling job???) as well as help to disprove these dating online theories. (By the way, what's so wrong with dating online anyways? It is possible to do it safely, but anywhos) And as for the comment asking why she would fly out there without making arrangements first, I can offer two theories. One, she didn't trust him, or two she wanted to surprise him?! I think that's a pretty safe assumption and if you can afford to do it, who cares? They may have been dating for a few months or a few years, we don't know. Who are we to judge? In any case, OP, I feel terrible for you. You will find much better and soon this will all just be a post on fmylife.com.
snrdncr08 2
United Kingdom* Wow. Epic fail.
mxnuelh 2
Fly for a boyfriend ??? How crazy girls are nowadays !
Branflakes78 13
Well 3 months is a long time, I would fly to a different country to see my Girlfriend if she was gone for 3 months!! Maybe you guys don't have real feelings for your GF or BF and your just in on the sex!
downtime 13
54, 3 months is not a long time, and many people try not to waste money on such things when they are trying to afford living costs such as rent or a mortgage. Cost of living in the UK is high, the cost of the flight can be very expensive depending on where you live, and its only going to be for 3 months. 3 years, sure, you have a valid point. But 3 months is nothing. You must be a teenager to think that's a big deal and not have the financial issues of the real world.
thebeautybleeds 17
Well they've been together for more than three months at least. I'd say they'd been together for quite awhile. He told her he had to go work in England, and 3 months later she decides to surprise him. I don't see what's so wrong with what she did. They were likely in a relationship for a long time. And why does everyone seem to think they only knew each other online? From what I gather he left her claiming to have to work abroad. I don't see any 'Internet dating' implication in the FML.
thatKidzmOm 10
106 I know if my bf left for 3 months, even with the costs of living and raising my daughter, I'd scrape up the money to fly and see him. I would miss him too much
downtime 13
126, From here the cost of that flight alone is $2000 + taxes etc. On top of which you have to pay through the ass just to live there. Goodluck not spending about $200 a day without even having a room to pay for. Assuming you do you've got to factor in hotel costs - cos lets face it, she may not be able to stay with him if he is living on his work site. So say you stay there for a week, you're looking at a minimum of around $3400. Of course, you'd scrape together that much money to see someone who is returning in a couple of months anyway...learn to video chat.
snrdncr08 2
I would have to disagree with you, 106. I was married to a Marine and by month 3 of his deployment I would have given anything to fly out and see him, regardless of the expense. To say that 54 must be a teenager and not have to deal with the financial issues of the real world is ignorant. I can list entire units of wives, husbands, and children who would disagree with you in an instant. Love is a powerful thing.
downtime 13
That's not love, its called impatience.
kittycatkelss 29
Who hurt you? Damn.
lolmigosh 15
Um what?
quite_bored 9
Well, maybe this story will help you understand. There was once an ugly barnacle. He was so ugly that everyone died. The end. Did it help? No? Ok.
Pelreskovich 11
Sounds like you no longer have a boyfriend. I'm sorry. :(
iseyixes 18
Reminds me of that "Friends" episode where Chandler told Janice he was transferred to Yemen because he couldn't break up with her....lol
chillyCholo 5
Why didn't you just call him?
ByronJess 17
Obviously OP missed him and wanted to see him bad enough to fly all the way there. I'm sure they've been in contact, he's just lying.
ninjuh_wingman 29
Your boyfriend doesnt quite seem real. It could just be me.
TOXICxANARCHIST 0
Fer sure haha
DontForgetMe4 0
I'm assuming the guy was lying to you..but its possible he had some problems? and didn't clue his friends in? ah, I don't know. he's a jerkwad.