Today, I fell down some steps, and my dad laughed at me. He then changed his facebook status to "My kid's an idiot." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I fell down a flight of stairs. The guy behind me was kind enough to ask if I was okay. He then called his friends over so they could laugh at me. FML
Today, I fell down the stairs. Lying on my back in extreme pain, I called my mom for help. When she came over, she said I looked like a dead bug, took a picture and posted it on Facebook. FML
Today, I fell down the stairs. My mom came running from the other room because she thought it was the dog. She rolled her eyes and walked away when she saw it was me. FML
Today, I joked with my dad, saying I'd gotten my boyfriend pregnant. In response, he slapped me, threw my phone across the room, smashed my laptop, and then took a moment for what I'd said to sink in. FML
Today, I fell asleep while using my laptop. The next thing I know, it's 8am and my dad is screaming at me for posting "u skank-ass cunt-face" on my mom's Facebook timeline. I never made that post, but he won't believe me. My asshole brother, meanwhile, can't stop smirking at me. FML
Today, I tripped and fell down some stairs at a family gathering. Instead of making sure I was OK, everyone laughed at me. Including my quadriplegic uncle, who asked his personal support worker to lift his arm just so he could point and laugh with everyone else. FML
Today, I fell down the stairs while reading the 'mind your step' sign. FML
Today, I laughed at my friend for tripping on the sidewalk. While imitating him to show “how stupid" he looked, I stepped on the exact same sidewalk, twisted my ankle, and fell over in front of a bunch of strangers. FML
Today, my dad got drunk at a party and flashed me and my friends. FML
Today, I helped my parents move out of their old house. While I was guiding my dad down the stairs with the couch, my mom asked me to pick up the tape on the step below me. I bent over and grunted. My dad thought I said "Go" and kept moving. He knocked me down two flights of steps. FML
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Top comments
scottovious 0
If the shoe fits wear it proudly... IDIOT!
ellice17 3
lmao
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Comments (64)
ellice17 3
lmao
jennybenny318 0
How do you know if OP's a girl?
WhiteFlagWarrior 2
IUs ghisa a replay or a question?
urdirtyolduncle 15
OP, you left out the part where he got "20 likes"
Cmliedtke 0
who said it was a girl... and either way, on the FML app it has a female sign in the corner of the FML so there ya go.
drewhelms42 0
douche.. haha
krazy_glu3 0
hah!!! your dad is hilarious!!
TheDrop 0
OPs dad hates OP
Anaxes 5
Holy shit #10, really? Being completely mentally deficient, I tend not to notice these things. You are a credit to the academic community you no doubt founded being so immensely smart, you obviously must know every single decimal place of Pi and be able to tell the exact amount of molecules in a piece of steel just by seeing a picture of it. I think I'm going to start a religion about you, being the smartest form of life in existence.
mitri_fml 3
No need to flame people for short simple statements..
Anaxes 5
#41 - I will decide who to flame and when for I am your god Xivilai Anaxes.
ShadyFTW1 0
Nah, 37 was a win. Nice job 37.
Anaxes 5
Yes, you should stop ruining my Cheerios.
jennybenny318 0
Well it doesn't show up on my itouch.
cheex87 0
hahaha! your dad's got a good sense of humor!
mmmskittles 3
and is apparently on facebook. what a catch. too bad your mom got there first.
carcinogan 0
too true Corporal!
allmidnighteyes 11
At least you weren't pregnant when you fell?
jesses393 0
haha so true
scottovious 0
If the shoe fits wear it proudly... IDIOT!
ramram1500 0
true!
FYLDeep 26
He just thought that was a retarded form of birth control OP.
atomicbaboon 0
Don't worry, we've all been there.
DocBastard 40
Lies! You can't prove that I've ever called OP an idiot.
WhiteFlagWarrior 2
Damn, manu women for DOC. The bottle is from thee latest one, no?
WhiteFlagWarrior 2
Crap, sorry, iPod was in Italian
thatfrenchguy 8
Doc, I'm going to need your help on this one because it's early and I'm not sure but...there is a mistake in the fml right? "my kid's an idiot" would imply that that "an idiot" of the kid is the subject of the status. just curious because no one has pointed it out.
Necromal 2
56 "Kid's" is a contraction of "kid" and "is." therefore it's not in the genetive tense but the accusative.
Bk130 0
Ask yourself, if your kid fell down that stairs, would you do the same? I would lol
mmmskittles 3
better question is: if your kid fell down and no one was around, did it really happen?
Bk130 0
Hope not because the first thing on my mind would be "Dam do I need to take her to go see a doctor?" LOL
angel55033 12
soooooo how many "likes" did he get? lol