Today, I discovered what it feels like to get a ruptured sinus. More specifically, I discovered what it feels like to get a ruptured sinus from being hit in the face by a pigeon that was deflected from the windscreen of a van moving at about 35mph. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, a gnat hit my forehead, fell into the space between my glasses and my face, and bounced off my eye while trying desperately to escape. When I tried to get my glasses off, it fell into my mask instead, and I accidentally inhaled it. FML
Today, I discovered that I had left my sunroof open all night during a storm and my front seats was soaked. I grabbed a towel for my seat but didn't close my sunroof because it was nice out. As I pull out of my driveway, I felt something wet hit my forehead. A bird shit on me through my sunroof. FML
Today, I went to the supermarket and picked up some groceries, along with what I thought was a bag of chips. I ripped it open in the car and realized it was a bag of birdseed. As I spat out the birdseed through the car's open window and tried to clean the mess, a pigeon flew into my car and attacked me. FML
Today, a bird crashed into my face. I didn't think that actually happened to people outside of cartoons. FML
Today, I found a dead bird on my windshield. Thinking I was clever, I turned on my windshield wipers to get the bird off. Unfortunately, the dead bird fell through my open window and onto my lap. FML
Today, while driving home from work, I heard a loud crash immediately followed by the sound of wind and shifting glass over my head. My sunroof exploded for no perceptible reason 5 days before Christmas. FML
Today, a bird ran into my window. My overzealous cat ran at it like the Flash and smashed his face in the window. He yelped and ran away, then as I was running to see if he was OK, I slammed my face in the door jamb. FML
Today, I found out the hard way what it feels like to have a seagull poo on your face while cycling. FML
Today, I was watching a beautiful flock of birds flying overhead while walking in the street. The guy next to me was lucky enough to catch bird poop with his forehead. I was lucky enough to get distracted by it, trip, and break my ankle. FML
Today, as I was driving, a bird swooped down, right in front of my car. I didn't have enough time to react, and so I had to listen to my wife cry the rest of the way home. She kept talking about how it bounced off the windshield and how it probably had a family. FML
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Top comments
dreamering 16
Take the positive side: You could have been hit by a cow.
PSQ91 6
FYL. Pigeons suck, they're so useless.
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Comments (105)
PSQ91 6
FYL. Pigeons suck, they're so useless.
titan87 0
They clean the streets there not called flying rats for nothing.
ugliness 6
we have mostly seagulls over here, they clean up 2x as fast as pigeons and beat the shit out of crows when they try to get some food :D but I agree, pigeons are useless :/ I guess at some point they separated from other types of dove and over populated everywhere
Thabb 0
Don't tell Mike Tyson that.
bowlingstar 1
40- I love your pic!!!!!!
j_cat187 20
pigens are good for target practice. whach them explode with the 7mm rem mag
iBoardSlide 0
well you need to learn how to punctuate a sentence properly (:
PurpleRae420 0
OW HOLY **** MAN I FEEL BAD FOR YOU YOU SHOULD DEFF GO TO THE HOSPITAL HOPE YOUR OK MAN!!!
boatkicker 5
I'd trade in my seagulls for pigeons any day. Gulls are too noisy. Pigeons less so.
Felix_Felicis15 8
According to my cousin, if you give a seagull an Alka Seltzer tablet, it'll explode.
yummylicious 5
hey **** you all I love pigeons
TookaWooka666 0
Haha OP is like Fabbio when he got pwned by a bird while riding In a roller coaster.
Gvfell 9
I think they are about as useful as wasps.
6969awesome 0
don't sneeze ;)
shanie123 10
I would have freaked out.
valri3 0
I would have just stated, "WTF?"
XmyviolentheartX 13
Lol. At least it didn't shit there too.
lulututu 4
pigeons are gross, ew.
nerdpower_fml 1
OP, you probably have AIDS now.
Soloman212 28
If he did it would be our fault, fellow primate.
Tayman24 0
lol
dreamering 16
Take the positive side: You could have been hit by a cow.
redbluegreen 41
Or an elephant.
Lumenoire 0
Or a heffalump.
redbluegreen 41
Don't even get me started on woozles.
FunnyGuy5051 7
Or a bus.
hughsmith 0
or your mom
AlterrOnmi 0
or your dad
aavatar10 0
Or one more time by Brittney Spears
Felix_Felicis15 8
Don't forget about the Jagulars along with the Heffalumps and Woozles!
xoCOURTNIEox 0
wtf haha
mariazzz 5
at least it didn't shit on you
WillKill4Beer 0
Hahahaha!! I like your profile pic! She's getting down on that Royal Wee Wee, lol! ^_^
HeavyMetalViking 0
Hide your kids everyone! Homing pigeons are everywhere!!!!
icecreamdriveby 5
NigaHiga?
belzedar16 0
that's shit..