Today, I discovered that the upside of losing weight is that men have started hitting on me. The downside? They're all twice my age. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, now that I've lost a significant amount of weight, all the guys that turned me down saying they “liked me as just a friend” all of a sudden are in my DMs saying, “Hey beautiful” and asking me out on a date. Nice to know I’m only liked for my body. FML
Today, I realized that being 60 pounds lighter has made every guy that crossed my path worship the ground I walk on. When I had the weight, guys would flinch at me, or not give me the time of day. I just want to be treated as a human being, no matter what size I am. FML
Today, I'm in the best shape of my life after losing 2.5 stone over 2 years. I never got any female attention when I was overweight, so I was quite surprised when at the gym an attractive woman came over and started flirting with me. It was going great, until she said, "You'd be perfect if you had a dad bod". FML
Today, I learned that my husband is attracted to obese, unhealthy women after celebrating my weight loss of 175lbs and improving my overall health. FML
Today, I realized that I’m undateable because of my weight. I’m 33. My entire life, I’ve always been dated in secret, guys went out with me to make fun of me behind my back, always got cheated on, always get friendzoned, etc. It’s not fair that I have to change my body type to get my chance at happily ever after. FML
Today, the guy I've recently started seeing confided that he's relieved I'm on the heavier side, and that he has a thing for watching chubby women eat. I just reached my ideal weight after losing 40 pounds. FML
Today, my mom and dad were talking about how if I lost weight, I would be attractive and have guys all over me. My dad said, “That’s exactly what I’m worried about.” It took me a while to realize they both think I’m ugly. FML
Today, I finally met the guy I've been talking to online for a year. I'd dropped 10lbs off my weight. He'd shaved 20 years off his age. FML
Today, my boyfriend suggested I try on some old clothes, after weeks of eating better and exercising. The good news: they fit again, and are even a little bit loose. The bad news: somehow, I look fatter now than I did before I started trying to lose weight. FML
Today, I came to terms with the fact that in order to get a boyfriend, I need to slim down. When I put full-body shots on dating apps, I get swiped left on. But when I put headshots, I get matches. And lots of them. But I can’t catfish these dudes. Time to go on a diet and hit the gym. It’s not fair. FML
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Top comments
ferrettamer 6
What if they were half your age?
perdix 31
Lose more weight. There are a lot of middle-aged chubby-chasers out there, but not a lot of young ones. As men age, they either lower their standards, or find out that sex with fatties is awesome, and become plumpa humpas. Good job on losing some of your weight, but you'll have to keep it up if you want to attract boys your own age. You might find it easier to give one of those old dudes a try and let him surprise you.
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Comments (122)
mfelax9556 8
ew thats nasty
Crazy_Toss3R 0
that's how life works these days
lol_that_sucks12 0
yep..
LemonStarship 5
My name is weezy but I ain't asthmatic.
seanders 10
Heh I don't see the problem. Post back when they're ambushing you in alleys
fat_snooki_lol 6
If you're in Sydney and sad and lonely, give me a shoutout. lol
cantfightfate 0
that happens to everyone. just work on your "get the hell away from me" look and it won't be as much of a problem.
mvc_pacheco 6
Twice she said. Twice she said
WishResign 0
how's that nasty? older dudes need love too, op! they have feelings. their dick withers with lonliness. *sniffle*
mfelax9556 8
i know old people need lovin too but they can find someone closer to their age!
skittle68 0
::shrug:: I'm 24 and my bf is 38. Who cares??
seanders 10
94: Congrats on dating on pedobear. When he was your age, you were 10.
FreePali 0
They also have twice as much money as guys your age, OP. Make sure there's no pre-nup
EpicPear 0
96 - Does it matter? they are still adults now
mandy_Reeves 0
yes...it happens to me too! I lost over 100 pounds and I get old men always hitting on me at the grocery store and Target or StarBucks.
mandy_Reeves 0
dam!!!! your bf is HAWT!!!!! my hubby is 38 too! older mens ftw girl!
pooponyuou 0
do they have tons of money?
tellithowitis 13
beggars can't be choosy
harry_potter_luv 0
Aww haha well at least it's someone right?
ImaginaryFoe 1
Agreed. Take it as a compliment and keep it moving. It's not like you were likely to meet your soul mate through a random pick-up anyway. The blokes your age are probably too busy hitting on girls half their age.
karmaslave 5
It's really not a compliment to be hit on by creepers unless you are seriously desperate.
theFMLiest1ofThe 0
beggers can't be choosers
katey280 0
gotta hate it..
ferrettamer 6
What if they were half your age?
spikey818 9
you can't attract younger ones?
ImFreeFalling 0
Um just be thankful guys are hitting on you. Don't complain about it on FML.
CitrusGirl 0
Even if she's 18 and they're 36? Age matters.
MissSarcasm01 18
Age is a number, maturity is a choice.
chloec16 0
Eww. creepers jeepers peepers.
TheRealFamilyGuy 5
there not flesh-eating creatures
7lollypop7 0
Meepers fleepers queezers? xD
CitizenSnipz 0
Pedobear. HOLY SHIT MY IPHONE CORRECTED ME ON MISPELLING THAT WTF
demarcusT 0
you are all biebers
tompullinger 0
hahaha creeps
beeffyboy 0
up side. cash
TheRealFamilyGuy 5
Another upside is you'll be a Milf, just like Barbra Bush
Karma495 0
omg XD you are a realpeter!
DeviRegression 0
Not always a bad thing. Love of my life is 17 years older than me. IMO, dudes that randomly hit on you when you're out and about probably aren't going to be the ones you hit it off with either, though (regardless of age).
LittleMissSusie 0
You're 20 and the love of your life is 37? Wtf is wrong with the both of you?!?
EpicPear 0
Age is only a number.