Today, I confessed to my husband that I quoted Lightning McQueen in an interview and got my dream job because of it. He wont stop laughing and telling my friends. I'm never going to live this down. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I confessed to my co-worker that I've secretly loved him for months. He laughed hysterically for about a minute straight before shaking his head and excusing himself from the store. Even the fact that my boss fired him for leaving early isn't cheering me up. FML
Today, I confessed my feelings to the girl I like, who also happens to be my coworker. She told my boss, and they're laughing about it as I type this. FML
Today, I finally had an interview for my dream job. It was all going great until I started chuckling uncontrollably, snorted like a pig and hit the guy with the world's largest snot rocket. All I could do was slip out the door as he sat paralysed with shock. FML
Today, my husband told me the hottest thing I'd ever done was when he pranked me, saying he was in legal trouble, and I told him what to do to stay out of jail. As he put it, I'm "a sexy Saul Goodman." FML
Today, after five years of working a soul-sucking dead end job, I was offered an amazing role in a new field. When the HR rep told me, I was so excited that I screamed at the top of my lungs, cheered like a maniac, and started laughing so hard I cried.I'm pretty sure he thinks I'm off my meds now. FML
Today, while talking to the girl I have a crush on, I bragged how people tell me I have a voice for radio. She responded, "And the face for it too." FML
Today, my husband told his parents that he was quitting his job so that he could focus on school. They asked him what he was going to do for money. When I told them that I'd be the one working, they took one look at me and burst into laughter. FML
Today, I proudly drove my new car to work, feeling on top of the world. As I parked, I noticed everyone in the lot staring at me. I smiled and waved, thinking they were admiring my car. It wasn't until I got to my desk that my boss informed me I'd dragged an orange traffic cone under my car the entire way to the office. FML
Today, I accidentally said, "Hell yes!" in front of a potential employer and a group of kids before an interview at a daycare center. FML
Today, I finally quit my job after talking with a friend about making our own design/multimedia company. While I was on my way to his house, he called me and told me not to quit because he got an awesome job offer and couldn't refuse. FML
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Top comments
pjsr 33
Interviewer: Would you consider yourself a team player? OP: “I create feelings in others that they themselves don't understand."
blightsight 10
ka-chow
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Comments (15)
Pan 2
What was the quote?!?! 😂😂
blightsight 10
ka-chow
julfunky 29
To be fair, it’s unlikely this one quote got you your dream job. Your qualifications and experience weigh more than this quote does.
pjsr 33
Interviewer: Would you consider yourself a team player? OP: “I create feelings in others that they themselves don't understand."
Charlie Given 28
Then tell your husband to go quote a movie and get a job
RichardPencil 32
Remind him that because you have that job, you can afford to have nice Cars.
johnnyswallop 18
Nothing to live down. You're awesome.
Bianca Jane Childs 1
Was it "I wanted to give the folks a little sizzle." or "One winner, 42 losers. I eat losers for breakfast." or "I decide when I’m done." that did it for you? Our did you physically quote by "flashing your fake headlights"?
Mathalamus 25
Then why did you tell him?
blahblabbity 19
wow, maybe i’ll start saying “kachow!” in interviews...
Davros 12
I hope it wasn't "the beach ate me" from Cars 3