Today, I caught my boyfriend of 8 years cheating on me. I punched him in the face, he broke up with me. And I still had to cook him an entire turkey dinner. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I found out my boyfriend has been cheating on me. He married someone, and got another girl pregnant. We were together for 8 years. FML
Today, I caught my boyfriend cheating right after I maxed out my credit card buying him everything on his Christmas list. FML
Today, my boyfriend drove to my house to break up with me. He only did so after I'd vacuumed the whole house to compensate for his cat allergies. I thought he was just coming to dinner. FML
Today, my fiancé broke it off with me on our 3-year anniversary at 12:01 a.m. on Thanksgiving morning. Guess who gets to go to family gatherings where everyone will be asking where he is. FML
Today, I beat my boyfriend in a video game. He promptly dumped me and told me to leave. FML
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me for "cheating" on him with his best friend. What did I do? I gave him a hug and a kiss on the cheek when I finally met him in person, after years of hearing about how great he is and how much we would get along. FML
Today, my bodybuilder boyfriend has been cheating on me, so I slapped him. He has such huge shoulder/neck muscle stuff, his head didn’t even move, and I dislocated 2 fingers. FML
Today, my boyfriend is pissed at me for giving everyone food poisoning right before the holiday and ruining the weekend. He’s the one that forced and berated me into using the nasty expired ingredients in his mom’s kitchen, even though I knew better. FML
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. While he was dumping me, he was holding hands with his new girlfriend. FML
Today, my boyfriend became convinced that I cheated on him, and broke up with me, saying he would "get me back." When I came home, I found his key on my counter and my cat missing. FML
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Top comments
SpideyRules 9
and WHY did you have to cook for him??
Narcentricity 1
why?
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Comments (243)
becca9985 34
Please tell me you work as a chef in a restaurant, because, otherwise, I can't possibly think of a good reason you would still have to cook him a turkey dinner. I'd chuck the uncooked turkey at his head as I kicked him out the door.
J15237 25
What for? You knee him in the dick and leave whatever the **** is going on to his stupid ass.