Today, I came home to find that while my husband and children were mindlessly watching TV, one of our dogs got into the cupboard that stores the deep fryer. He got the lid off, ate all of the old oil and barfed everything up on the couch. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I went home for lunch. Upon opening the door, I smelled something horrid. My dog had opened his cage, eaten all the dog treats, and had diarrhea all over my bed and bedroom floor. FML
Today, I made dinner for myself after a long day full of annoying family drama. I had the pan sizzling away when I went to grab some herbs from the fridge. As I turned around, I tripped on the rug, sending the entire frying pan of food flying into the air. It landed directly in front of my never-endingly hungry dogs, so I watched as my ruined dinner disappeared. FML
Today, my dog got his head stuck in a container, panicked, and shat himself all over the living room. FML
Today, I came home to find my dog had learned how to open our fridge. He ate the birthday cake I was saving for a friend's surprise party, and to add insult to injury, he'd also apparently thrown the barely digested cake up all over my bed. FML
Today, I was craving some comfort food, so I grabbed a bag of nachos from the cupboard and sat down to binge-watch Netflix. As I opened the bag, the chips exploded everywhere, spilling all over the couch, and floor. I spent the next half hour picking up crumbs while my dog and cats happily ate the scraps. FML
Today, I came home to find that my dog had figured out how to open the fridge again. He'd helped himself to raw eggs and crab. FML
Today, I fell asleep while watching a movie. My puppy took this opportunity to help himself to half a gallon of vegetable oil. FML
Today, while taking out a jar of mayonnaise, it slipped from my hand, landing on its lid, exploding, and covering both of my dogs from head to tail in it. Terrified, they fled, leaving a trail of globs of mayo. After cleaning both dogs and the house, they both threw up from eating too much mayonnaise. FML
Today, I came home to find the dog had learned how to open our stair-gate and kitchen door, devoured the entire fruitcake I'd made for a special occasion, and then vomited said fruitcake all over the fabric sofa. FML
Today, I sat down on my couch with a nice cool beer after a tough day at work. I tried opening a bag of chips. The bag exploded, covering me in chips and crumbs, turning me into a sticky human nacho. Well, my dog certainly saw me as a snack, and I had to shower and change clothes. So much for relaxing. FML
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Top comments
iemislayer 10
Why do you have oil in the frier sitting in the cupboard??? It should always be drained before storing away
starcable 9
wow if I was the husband and my wife came home to that she probably kill me for not noticing something like that.
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Comments (82)
karlcolt45 19
at least they all didn't get into the fry oil
alexafml 5
I don't really like dogs in the house, if he's digging he's bored. You should let him go play outside :)
Ameel_fml 19
Or maybe he could just smell the oil and thought it would make a good meal? Just because the dog ate something it shouldn't have, doesn't mean its bored and/or kept locked in the house with no way out.
Sputnikspak 13
That sounds like something my dog would do. He thinks cat poop is a delicacy... Time to get some Nature's Miracle. Maybe a gallon jug will do.
mgrabi01 10
Your nasty for keeping oil in a deep fryer thats stored away in a cupboard. Clean your dishes so that the next time your dog decides to have an adventure in the cupboard, it won't have anything to lick clean! Nasty people!!!!
ntiger8705 2
YDI. You should never keep used oil in dark closed places. it becomes rancid and full of bacteria and your whole family could become sick, not just ur dog. either strain it n store it properly of dispose of it after the first use. that's disgusting.
travisbell5 1
Dogs must be starting to get smarter. First dog opening door and now this... WOW :-P
jadenation 3
'murica
sxm 13
That's ******* hilarious.
MooseKnuckle5150 13
It happened on his watch, he can clean it. But, why the **** did you store it with old oil in it??
twiztedone 19
And this is why you don't leave things like that down for the animals to get! Why would you leave a deep fryer filled with old oil down? Sounds more like YDI then FML.