Today, I came home on leave after a seven month deployment in the middle of the ocean for the Navy. My entire region got hit by the worst flood in recorded history. I need a speedboat to go to the Quick-e-mart. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, both of the roads leading to my small town were washed out by rising flood waters. I now live on an island in the middle of Wyoming. FML
Today, I was giving a tour of my boat to a man who seemed interested in purchasing it. Everything was going great. That is, until, the motor stopped running in the middle of the ocean. FML
Today, while on vacation with my family, I went parasailing. Just as I was about to take off, the wind picked up and I got blown off course. I ended up crashing into a boat and had to be rescued by the coastguard. FML
Today, I'm in my fourth month of training in the US Navy. I'm 3000 miles from home. I joined to give my wife a better life. Since I've been gone, she decided that she liked being single. FML
Today, I went camping. My tent is flooded, a raccoon ate all my food, I lost the anchor to my boat which as a result is now across the lake. Three more days. FML
Today, I got back from a six month deployment overseas. My girlfriend of three years couldn't pick me up from the airport because she had an intramural softball game to go to. FML
Today, during a boat trip with my boyfriend's family, I got seasick and went to the side of the boat to puke. A current rocked the boat so badly that I fell overboard, prompting a panicked rescue and my boyfriend's mom muttering that I'm a pathetic attention whore. FML
Today, our boat broke down in the middle of a lake at sunset. We called our friend for help, and his truck and trailer got stuck in mud at the boat ramp. We called the sheriff's office to tow his vehicle out of the mud. The tow strap broke. FML
Today, there's lethal flooding in the Reno area, with all roads to my work closed and flooded. My boss still expects me to drive through it, in the dark, to work at 6am. FML
Today, after I was on deployment 6000 miles away, and because my wife was struggling pretty bad with work, kids, and taking care of everything on her own, she finally had a breakdown so I came home early to help. I found out she was fucking another Navy dude the whole time. I should've stayed out there. FML
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Top comments
letmeinplease 0
Well at least you've got practice...
Dopeyrox 0
well, at least your use to the water right?
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Comments (104)
nolovin 0
That sucks man, i am sorry. What type of ship were you on, cuz anything has to be better than a frigate
TheRealKilo24 0
Good lord the ocean is fallowing you!!!!!!
sexysue 0
try swimming in the snow. lol
cactus_fml 0
Oh, the irony. FYL, OP. Hope the damage isn't too bad. :/ Maybe you live on a hill.
theninja1800 11
at least you get more water time???
bethany_camille 0
you have a quick e mart? awesome name!!! thanks for serving our nation!
panpanesquivel 0
there are quick e marts , they do exist. dint hate because he's i'n the military , who cares what branch as long as you give a crap about your job and your defending or bettering this country? and to you that think that anyone i'n any part of the military wants to just kill people get over it it's not just infantry i'n the marines, army,navy, or air force. you need someone to handle the people trying to attack us, would you rather be over taken by enemies of the us ? or be protected by these brave people ik I wouldn't like to do my husbands job and be deployed to were a ride i'n a vehicle could be your last,
Veryblueapple 0
Poor Guy. How are there even people saying YDI? lol. Makes no damn sense.
Fakeddd 0
Welcome Home, Seaman. Yes, I know it's spelled semen, but that was funny.
thefmlman2011 37
say hi to apu for me!