Today, I came home from a crazy costume party and took a hot shower. When I opened my eyes and saw the water running from my head was bloody, I freaked out and called my friend for help. She had to remind me that for the party, I'd coloured my hair red with washable hair dye. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I tried dyeing my hair at home to save some money. I carefully followed the instructions but when I rinsed it off, my hair turned a shocking shade of shiity neon green. Not wanting to leave the house looking like a radioactive toad, I wore a hat and hoped nobody would notice. FML
Today, I got my hair dyed at a fancy salon. While the stylist was pulling out the foils in my hair I sat up and started screaming in pain because the hot foils were burning my scalp. All she said was "oh, you're fine". I went back home to find an oozing burn wound on my scalp. FML
Today, I decided to lighten my hair. I applied the dye and waited 20 minutes. When I went to wash the dye out, the water wouldn't turn on. After my head started to burn, I called the landlord in a panic. Turns out there was a water main break and the entire city block doesn't have water. FML
Today, I decided to change my hair color. After waiting in anticipation, I took a shower to rinse out the dye and reveal my new, blue hair. Rinsing revealed not only blue hair, but blue skin caused by the watered dye running over my body. I now look like a smurf, and it's not coming out. FML
Today, I got industrial toilet cleaner in my eyes. Despite the raging fire party going on behind my eyelids, I resisted the urge to stop, drop, and roll, and calmly got in the shower to wash it off. Wherein I promptly slipped, fell, and whacked my head full-force on the bathtub on the way down. FML
Today, at a wild party, I cracked open a few glowsticks and drew patterns on my face and arms with the glowing liquid, then started dancing, hoping to impress some hotties. I was tearing it up until my skin started to burn, really bad. I ended up running out screaming and calling 911. FML
Today, my husband thought it would be hilarious to slip a little fake blood into the bathtub while I was relaxing in it, eyes closed. When I opened my eyes, the water was one big cloud of red. I screamed so loud that I might as well have been dying, and yes, he recorded everything. FML
Today, I woke up with my face covered in blood. Turns out that yesterday at my colleague's birthday party, I got so drunk that I started yelling "Nappy time!" before falling out of my hammock and face-first onto the concrete ground. FML
Today, I fell in the shower and knocked myself out. When I came to I turned off the water and called my mom. She seemed more worried about the amount of water I "wasted" than she was about me. FML
Today, I woke up in the shower at my coworker's house, with my clothes on and soaking wet. Apparently, the night before I drank too much and punched my best friend. The sad part is, I passed out on the couch, but somehow ended up in the shower, facing the wrong way. FML
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Top comments
Blue_Black_fml 21
Sorry to say this OP, but you're an idiot..
Rayth 19
A bit forgetful are we?
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Comments (79)
DraconicFeline 31
61 - Nah, it's pretty long, but not the longest. Didn't you ever read that follow-up from the guy with the beeping sound in his basement? He wrote a short, long, and epic tale version of his search (including a sword fighting duel with a spider).
skyrim_fanatic 17
that sucks, but i am just happy it was nothing serious ;D
metallicaNLC 2
at least you didn't waste a bunch of time and whatnot by calling an ambulance or going to a doctor or something...
Meepson 9
Fake as ****
Qwermy 16
alcohol at that party?
fakedsincerity 32
Heh. At Halloween I had fake blood all over me and went to sleep without washing it off and woke up and there was "blood" all over everything and for a second I freaked out until I remembered. lol. I feel your pain, OP.
PrimeStarscream 30
Oops. Did any light bulbs explode? Did people throw tampons at you and say "plug it up?"
mike762414 6
Let me guess, OP, original color is blonde?
MartinDJ 26
Love the Game Of Thrones reference ;)
littlelesbian 9
Honestly OP, Ive been there. But most of the time I wake up, forgetting I dyed my hair, and startle myself. We all have those moments