Today, I broke my arm. When I got home from the doctors with my cast, I fell asleep on the couch from the medicine. When I woke up, there were swastikas, "I love the KKK", and multiple penises written all over my cast. My dad thought it would be funny. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I fell asleep on the way to a pool party and woke up covered in sharpie swastikas and dicks. FML
Today, I was laying on the couch with a cast on my broken ankle. My brother thought it would be funny to shoot my cast with a high-powered pellet gun. It went straight through the cast and now I need to go back to the hospital. FML
Today, I fell down the stairs and broke my arm. I went into hospital to get it put in a cast, but still went into school afterwards. I got written up for truancy because I didn't have a doctor's note. The cast was still on my arm. FML
Today, my dad got drunk and played a practical joke on me; a practical joke that resulted in my knee being broken. Now, I'm sitting in a hospital bed all alone while my dad hunts for "hot nurses". FML
Today, after a stay at the hospital for two broken legs, I finally got home and attempted to relax. My dad went to hand me the remote and dropped it right on my nuts. FML
Today, I'm sitting in the emergency room because my girlfriend thought it would be funny to superglue my penis to my thigh while I was sleeping. FML
Today, I went to the hospital to get a cast that I have been wearing for the past three months removed from my wrist. Thanks to said cast, I couldn't have any summer fun at all. The doctor took a final X-ray and said, "Well look at that, your wrist wasn't fractured to begin with." FML
Today, I fell off of the deck in my backyard, which wouldn't have been that bad if my drunk, idiot brother hadn't jumped off behind me yelling, "FINISH HIM!" while delivering a bone-crushing body slam. He is fine. I, however, am currently getting a cast for a broken arm. FML
Today, my "friend" put itching powder in my cast while I was sleeping. FML
Today, my dad picked me up from school, something he'll be doing while my broken leg heals. He thought it'd be hilarious to arrive early and ask the staff where his "crippled" son was, loudly saying I'd broken my leg in a "masturbation-related accident". FML
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Top comments
robbilee 14
just paint it or cover it with marker
stacster 0
well grab a sharpie and start turning penises into space ships
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Comments (243)
robbilee 14
just paint it or cover it with marker
jl7 0
you'd think that would be common sense
TheRealFamilyGuy 5
1# are you a descendent of Altair?
GothicAngel17 24
(Y)
jjusn 0
FTW
BisFitty 7
OP, LMFAO, your dad was right!
robbilee 14
#39 why would u ask me that?
GeraldisTheG 3
#1 what about ezio?
z620 0
well, your dad was right. it was funny, just not to you
jannie22 0
you don't paint with markers XD
soccerluver315 14
Theyre called paint markers and yes they exist.
CrzyMnky 0
I agree. Swastikas are bad. :|
blowAnut 3
Because you kind of look like Desmond from assassins creed
kuraifenshi 18
Nah, he totally looks more like Malik-
LaidToRest48 9
well at FiRST he prob thought it was funny
Ozmat 0
owned
TheAftermath 0
Bad bad dad. Cover them up with markers! Problem Solved.
jenifriend 1
ha that's funny but kinda mean too.
Sweej 1
Shutup fat bitch. That's also funny but kinda mean too.
MrBond007_fml 6
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
what are you so upset about, there aren't any black or jewish people in Australia, if you lived in like LA or New York, than yah that would suck.
Sirin_fml 47
Are you high? Of course there are black and Jewish people in Australia.
dragonaair 5
There is a spot in Sydney where there are heaps of Jewish people, actually. We have lots of black people here as well. Don't say shit you don't know about.
FYLDeep 26
That's pretty typical actually. Jewish people are often found in highly concentrated areas.
GothicAngel17 24
uhm excuse me? not many black people? You cant walk down the street here without seeing a few hundred of them! in groups of like 20! and they bash u full on for that shit! poeple get killed! what drugs are you on?! honestly, the ignorance of many Americans about Australia annoys me.
MrBond007_fml 6
Ethnic groups:white 92%, Asian 7%, aboriginal and other 1% Religions:Catholic 25.8%, Anglican 18.7%, Uniting Church 5.7%, Presbyterian and Reformed 3%, Eastern Orthodox 2.7%, other Christian 7.9%, Buddhist 2.1%, Muslim 1.7%, other 2.4%, unspecified 11.3%, none 18.7% (2006 Census) LOOK IT UP!!! https://www.cia.gov/library/publications/the-world-factbook/geos/as.html
clockworkangel 0
193 ..we live in 2011 not 2006 things change.
MrBond007_fml 6
ya, but that's all I found. and they don't change that dramatically. and please everyone who wants to bash my comment continue reading all of the comments until the end, I'm pretty sure your not going to say something that has not already been said.
abstar 0
that is the most ridiculous set of statistics I've ever seen. no way is there only 7% Asian and there are a far larger array of nationalities than 92% White. how ridiculous! I'm pretty sure that source is rubbish.
GothicAngel17 24
not sayin its a bad thing theres lots of aborigines. Im against racism
Bad_kitty 0
How old is your dad?? He should really grow up.
SamanthaRose143 6
Amen.
pinkclouds 0
lmao!!! oh my gosh that's terrible!!!! :D
beasting 0
well that sucks
bv110 2
your dad=douche bag...just sayin, if it were my dad, his ass would have been kicked with a hammer within the next minute! just paint over it with white paint should be fine but refuse to unlock your bedroom door while your asleep!